[WK/1] MIDDLEWEIGHT MATCHUP Gramur 0-0 v. DethStryque 0-0

Discussion in 'Rapmusic.com Battle League' started by Riot, Jan 30, 2011.

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  1. Riot

    Riot The Dark Hero.

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2001
    Messages:
    12,505
    RAPMUSIC BATTLE LEAGUE


    -Check Ins-

    Checking In is Mandatory from now on

    -Due dates-

    All Verses Due THURSDAY night 12:00am Pacific
    All Voting Due Sunday Night @ or around 8:00pm Pacific
    (Voting is considered open until Mods close matches)

    -Line Limit-

    Minimum 12 -- Maximum 30
    Agree with opponent on check in
    If there is no agreement, 2nd emcee to post must match 1st persons verse
    (2nd emcee can post less but not more lines then his opponent)

    -Voting-

    You Must Post Links to 5 Battles you Voted on
    Each Battler is required to vote on at least 5 Battles
    1 Vote deduction for each battle not voted on
    Voting is open only for those who are signed into the RBL
    If You are signed in you CANNOT vote until your first battle is up!
    Votes must be explained, No Hate Votes, Crew Votes, Revenge Votes
    Everyone Mustvote on Contender, & Title matches

    -General Rules-

    1st emcee to post can't edit after 2nd emcee posts
    2nd emcee can't edit after the first vote is made
    No Biting or Recycling, if Caught your out of the RBL
    Bitching, Crying, Freeposting, Swaying. Whining..
    Beefing, Cursing, Spamming & other forms of Badmanner
    Is strictly to go in the Beef, Magazine, Predictions, or Hookups
    (If broken the Mod has the right to Edit & Clean Up Threads)
    New rules will be voted on by the Mods & Members of the RBL
    Mods can Adjust rules accordingly to circumstance!
    Questions, Suggestions, Ideas, Problems.. Contact the Mod!​



    .
    test
  2. Gramur

    Gramur Yung Troy

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2008
    Messages:
    855
    in..14
    Posted via Bag Phone
    test
  3. DethStryque

    DethStryque DethStryque theInvincible

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2008
    Messages:
    2,093
    In.Nah let's go 30.Better yet? Let's split the difference at 22.
    test
  4. Gramur

    Gramur Yung Troy

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2008
    Messages:
    855
    if you go first, then yea...if not, 14 it is
    test
  5. DethStryque

    DethStryque DethStryque theInvincible

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2008
    Messages:
    2,093
    I'll go first
    test
  6. Gramur

    Gramur Yung Troy

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2008
    Messages:
    855
    umm...you suck

    You can't reach my criteria with your garbage material
    the only Total you gettin near is whole grain cereal
    who's fearing your style? I know you're a wuss
    I stay weeding out the lames and you'll be full of that kush
    I'm bout' to whoop you in 22, you're boring as lectures
    splitting the difference of 14 and 30 only makes me 8 times better!!
    I got some anger that's been built up since forever
    so I'll take the chip off my shoulder and put it on this square like checkers
    cuz winning this will be easy, you scared to lose? you better lose me
    or your featherweight ass is Gone With the Wind like that movie
    I can tell your ego's big, you're a big headed man
    so dammit.... I'm smashin pumpkins like the band
    Your broke style shows me you're not getting grands and cakin
    cuz your Grands come with grits, eggs, hashbrowns, and bacon
    give me props cuz I'm good like Meagan
    and guaranteed to make you leave on bad terms like Reagan
    I'll open up ya girl's puss til it's the symbol of Masons
    yessir....I'll beat the vag til it's drier than raisins
    yea I'm lyrically hazin, blazin and killin you doc
    they'll see Deth at a Funeral that don't include a Chris Rock
    welcome to my vicious world where you're considered as wack
    you're like the fishes you floppin when you not in habitat
    test
  7. DethStryque

    DethStryque DethStryque theInvincible

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2008
    Messages:
    2,093
    In the '09 RBL you NEEDED 2 "NO-SHOWS" to be 3-3.This MARK IS AVERAGE!
    My punches SHOCK YOU like I called down bolts from heaven tuh gitcha carcass savaged
    N LYNCHED YOU WITH ELECTRIC EELS while RAIDEN used you for TARGET PRACTICE
    I'll spark n ravage ya heart n cabbage! Your spine'll shatter from PRIMAL DAGGERS
    You "Got dat COLLEGE SWAG"? I'll COCK THIS MAG n give you dat WINO STAGGER
    My rhyme flow's badder! Plus I'll send a shell of heat tuh blend his spleen
    Winnin? I'll upend his dream n leave his RECORD 3-4 like NFL DEFENSIVE SCHEMES
    Words shine til my SENTENCE BLINGS n judges REFUSE GRAM like REPENTED FIENDS
    I let off heat like VENTED STEAM with ratchets like REPAIRMEN UNIONS!
    Your bombs miss like errant crewmen and you RECYCLE like KAREN NOONAN!!
    I'm BLACK FLY n DROP BOMBS like TUSKEGEE AIRMEN SHOOTIN!!
    Rush me B? I'm FLARIN RUGES N spit blazin rap barrages
    Punches stretch you n I'll step on ya spine like Asian back massages!
    You ASS OUT like I SNATCH YA DRAWSLESS!! I jab the jaws of jabber jaws with
    Raptor claws sicc shatter maul this rapper scald his cadaver with chatter flawless!!
    Splatter all his thoughts with a cocked fifth.When I hock spit I drop sicc gutter psalms
    That PUTS FOOT to ya GRAMMUR/GRAMMA like I PUNTED YA TONSILS then
    TRAMPLED YA MOTHER'S MOMZ
    Commando bust da llamz let off ammo like mustard bombs as the preamble for those clustered swans uttered songs when this sucker's gone!!
    Gram? You ain't got the heart for this but my hardest scripts are marvelous!
    These larks uh split ya heart n wig til you're plugged n slammed n BLOOD AND SAND like SPARTACUS!!
    These cartridges uh smack your team n make this bastard teen backward lean
    Dawg,I'll CHECK YOU WITH A "L" like I MOVED MY KNIGHT N TRAPPED YOUR KING
    test
  8. DethStryque

    DethStryque DethStryque theInvincible

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2008
    Messages:
    2,093
    test
  9. Mrjdm998

    Mrjdm998 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2011
    Messages:
    7,040
    Gramur:

    "the only Total you gettin near is whole grain cereal"

    Corny as fuck, terrible line. Sorry to call that bout straight away, but it has to be done.

    "splitting the difference of 14 and 30 only makes me 8 times better!!"

    The idea is great, however it makes no sense. Switching times to lines would make more sense.

    "give me props cuz I'm good like Meagan
    and guaranteed to make you leave on bad terms like Reagan"

    I like the second line, and the set-up was good.

    "I'll open up ya girl's puss til it's the symbol of Masons
    yessir....I'll beat the vag til it's drier than raisins"

    I like it.

    Overall I didn't like your verse much. The punchlines weren't very string and you didn't make up for it with schemes (Which were meh) and multis (You had a total of zero). Sorry man, try harder.

    Deth:
    I'll be honest, I don't like your style much. The lines are a bit too long in my opinion. It's not a major thing and it's just my opinion, but I'm just throwing it out there.

    "Rush me B? I'm FLARIN RUGES N spit blazin rap barrages
    Punches stretch you n I'll step on ya spine like Asian back massages!
    You ASS OUT like I SNATCH YA DRAWSLESS!! I jab the jaws of jabber jaws with
    Raptor claws sicc shatter maul this rapper scald his cadaver with chatter flawless!!"

    Fucking love this. Especialy the back massage line.

    "Dawg,I'll CHECK YOU WITH A "L" like I MOVED MY KNIGHT N TRAPPED YOUR KING"

    Bit played.

    I liked your verse, even though it's not my style. The schemes and multis were great. There weren't many name flips/personals, but there weren't many in Grams either,

    Overall: Neither of you hit personaly, but Gram had weak punches. Deth outclassed him with his punchlines, the schemes/multis were just dirt in the grave to me.

    Vote: DethStryque
    test
  10. smittyrhythm

    smittyrhythm you love 2 hate me

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2011
    Messages:
    1,147
    You can't reach my criteria with your garbage material
    the only Total you gettin near is whole grain cereal
    --- ok

    Who's fearing your style? I know you're a wuss
    I stay weeding out the lames and you'll be full of that kush
    --- ok


    I'm bout' to whoop you in 22, you're boring as lectures
    splitting the difference of 14 and 30 only makes me 8 times better!!
    --- best bar so far


    I got some anger that's been built up since forever
    so I'll take the chip off my shoulder and put it on this square like checkers
    --- ok

    cuz winning this will be easy, you scared to lose? you better lose me
    or your featherweight ass is Gone With the Wind like that movie
    --- pffftt…

    I can tell your ego's big, you're a big headed man
    so dammit.... I'm smashin pumpkins like the band
    --- ???? LOL, umm ok…maybe would’ve applied against Jack Lantern


    Your broke style shows me you're not getting grands and cakin
    cuz your Grands come with grits, eggs, hashbrowns, and bacon
    --- meh

    give me props cuz I'm good like Meagan
    and guaranteed to make you leave on bad terms like Reagan
    --- meh, stll waiting for that punch

    I'll open up ya girl's puss til it's the symbol of Masons
    yessir....I'll beat the vag til it's drier than raisins
    --- still waiting

    yea I'm lyrically hazin, blazin and killin you doc
    they'll see Deth at a Funeral that don't include a Chris Rock
    --- ahaa!! Here we go, FINALLY a punch that applies at Deth

    welcome to my vicious world where you're considered as wack
    you're like the fishes you floppin when you not in habitat
    --- flopped


    versus

    In the '09 RBL you NEEDED 2 "NO-SHOWS" to be 3-3.This MARK IS AVERAGE!
    My punches SHOCK YOU like I called down bolts from heaven tuh gitcha carcass savaged
    N LYNCHED YOU WITH ELECTRIC EELS while RAIDEN used you for TARGET PRACTICE
    --- stretched, but something you tend to do…good plays

    I'll spark n ravage ya heart n cabbage! Your spine'll shatter from PRIMAL DAGGERS
    You "Got dat COLLEGE SWAG"? I'll COCK THIS MAG n give you dat WINO STAGGER
    --- ehhhhh, you know me…Im lookin for what applies

    My rhyme flow's badder! Plus I'll send a shell of heat tuh blend his spleen
    Winnin? I'll upend his dream n leave his RECORD 3-4 like NFL DEFENSIVE SCHEMES
    Words shine til my SENTENCE BLINGS n judges REFUSE GRAM like REPENTED FIENDS
    --- Ok here we go^

    I let off heat like VENTED STEAM with ratchets like REPAIRMEN UNIONS!
    Your bombs miss like errant crewmen and you RECYCLE like KAREN NOONAN!!
    I'm BLACK FLY n DROP BOMBS like TUSKEGEE AIRMEN SHOOTIN!!
    --- missing bar?

    Rush me B? I'm FLARIN RUGES N spit blazin rap barrages
    Punches stretch you n I'll step on ya spine like Asian back massages!
    ---lol

    You ASS OUT like I SNATCH YA DRAWSLESS!! I jab the jaws of jabber jaws with
    Raptor claws sicc shatter maul this rapper scald his cadaver with chatter flawless!!
    --- lol, mr.multiple over here

    Splatter all his thoughts with a cocked fifth.When I hock spit I drop sicc gutter psalms
    That PUTS FOOT to ya GRAMMUR/GRAMMA like I PUNTED YA TONSILS then
    TRAMPLED YA MOTHER'S MOMZ
    Commando bust da llamz let off ammo like mustard bombs as the preamble for those clustered swans uttered songs when this sucker's gone!!
    --- ok

    Gram? You ain't got the heart for this but my hardest scripts are marvelous!
    These larks uh split ya heart n wig til you're plugged n slammed n BLOOD AND SAND like SPARTACUS!!
    --- ok

    These cartridges uh smack your team n make this bastard teen backward lean
    Dawg,I'll CHECK YOU WITH A "L" like I MOVED MY KNIGHT N TRAPPED YOUR KING
    --- And closed with the bar you dropped in sign-in, SHAME

    Gramur- wow, you know how to wordplay good for you!! But it isn’t enough. When you told me to ‘read your verse’ and compare it to mine, knowing deth was yet to drop, I laughed. And not an lol, I literally laughed out loud. The chris rock funeral bar was the closest swing at a personal. No where near enough ammunition, and if you expect to beat me that way youre in over your head

    Deth- Let me start off by saying the obvious, I hate your style. It’s cram packed with multi’s that never apply and youre all over the place. Like watching somebody with terets type rhymes. BUT, you applied against your opponent this time around. Your personals landed, and over ran Gramurs verse for miles. Im not gonna lie I deducted points for your closer, but it didn’t matter. The plays against his name and history were far too strong. Not to mention, and I cringe at writing this, but your rhyme structure with your multiples aint half bad. I’ll give you credit. Good verse.

    v/ dethstryque
    test
  11. Mista FREEZE 2001

    Mista FREEZE 2001 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2001
    Messages:
    368
    *FREEZE chuckling*

    I actually agree with everyone else who voted. I think DETH won and I really like the 3-4 NFL line but MAN HE ADDS A WHOLE LOTTA OF FILLER IN EACH SENTENCE! It is like waaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy tooo much tooooo finally get to a punchline. I hate it that ppl place so much on multis that they miss rhyme schemes and punches. I also hate it when they write bars they could never use LIVE ON STAGE AND IN AN ACTUAL BATTLE.....

    BLECH! Deth does that.... A LOT!!! Doesnt matter... He won here!!!
    test
  12. Ja¢k £an†e®n

    Ja¢k £an†e®n Spirit of Vengeance

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2005
    Messages:
    721
    who's fearing your style? I know you're a wuss
    I stay weeding out the lames and you'll be full of that kush
    I'm bout' to whoop you in 22, you're boring as lectures
    splitting the difference of 14 and 30 only makes me 8 times better!!
    I got some anger that's been built up since forever
    so I'll take the chip off my shoulder and put it on this square like checkers
    give me props cuz I'm good like Meagan
    and guaranteed to make you leave on bad terms like Reagan
    I'll open up ya girl's puss til it's the symbol of Masons
    yessir....I'll beat the vag til it's drier than raisins
    yea I'm lyrically hazin, blazin and killin you doc
    they'll see Deth at a Funeral that don't include a Chris Rock

    vs

    My rhyme flow's badder! Plus I'll send a shell of heat tuh blend his spleen
    Winnin? I'll upend his dream n leave his RECORD 3-4 like NFL DEFENSIVE SCHEMES
    Words shine til my SENTENCE BLINGS n judges REFUSE GRAM like REPENTED FIENDS
    I let off heat like VENTED STEAM with ratchets like REPAIRMEN UNIONS!
    Your bombs miss like errant crewmen and you RECYCLE like KAREN NOONAN!!
    I'm BLACK FLY n DROP BOMBS like TUSKEGEE AIRMEN SHOOTIN!!
    Splatter all his thoughts with a cocked fifth.When I hock spit I drop sicc gutter psalms
    That PUTS FOOT to ya GRAMMUR/GRAMMA like I PUNTED YA TONSILS then
    TRAMPLED YA MOTHER'S MOMZ
    Gram? You ain't got the heart for this but my hardest scripts are marvelous!
    These larks uh split ya heart n wig til you're plugged n slammed n BLOOD AND SAND like SPARTACUS!!

    i read this shit like 4 times. everybody countin gramur out cuz they automatically expected dethstryque to win. but i liked more lines from him than i did from deth. i was really feelin the kush, 8x, n chris rock lines. over all solid verse with not much filler.
    dethstryque seems like he tries too hard to make everything rhyme. you succeed, yes, but the end result is often a forced n stretched load of fuller ending in a bland multi. which gave your verse about "8 times" the filler that gramur's verse had. but you did have some clean hard hitters in there. my favorites being the punt n sparticus lines.
    so in the end, dethstryque's super lyricism kinda was his downfall. the few really dope punches couldn't outweigh the tons n tons of "cool flow but ehh material" lines..

    vote: gramur
    test
  13. lyricalpriest

    lyricalpriest Rap Games Dawson Creek

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2000
    Messages:
    24,093
    vote deth.. edit** i had a whole break down of each person verse. but for some reaason something fuccidy fucked up happened.

    deth wins with superior punchlines and rhyme scheme hands down!
    test
  14. Severity.

    Severity. New Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2010
    Messages:
    104
    This battle was mediocre in my opinion.

    Gramur's best line was the "Death at a Funeral" joint, but I had to wade through like 18 bland lines to get to it. Stylistically, not that interesting either.

    Deathstryke's lines were uneven in some cases way too long. His style's similar to mine in some places though, in terms of multi usage. Most of the lines were bland, but the concepts were more interesting even when the execution failed, at least. Death's last line was his best, but in this battle its not saying that much.

    Overall this was lackluster, but my vote goes to Deathstryke for at least trying to be creative & spicing up his writing wit multis. Just shorten those lines, man!

    Vote = Deathstryke
    Biotch! You wish you had a phone like mine...
    test
  15. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones www.TaCsmassivecock.gov

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2008
    Messages:
    76,201
    Gramur:

    I'm bout' to whoop you in 22, you're boring as lectures
    splitting the difference of 14 and 30 only makes me 8 times better!!

    Your broke style shows me you're not getting grands and cakin
    cuz your Grands come with grits, eggs, hashbrowns, and bacon

    yea I'm lyrically hazin, blazin and killin you doc
    they'll see Deth at a Funeral that don't include a Chris Rock

    whatsup, Gram. been a while. this verse didnt seem like you put much time into it. "gone with the wind like that movie" "smashing pumpkins like the band" was weak. you coulda put more time in and made those into a nice line. the rhymes were pretty simplistic. prolly just rust though. keep working

    Deth:

    you already know, i like you, but i dont like your battle verses. you said you were going to work on doing shit differently in this league, but this is the same exact shit you dropped in the battle area. same as before, you let your rhymes dictate your lines, and you dont come with punchlines. Twista couldn't make your shit flow right. you need to tighten up your lines and work on this shit. as i've said before, the multis are cool and shit, but writing like this is grindtime aint gonna work.

    vote- Gramur
    test
  16. HeartCloaker

    HeartCloaker Winter is coming

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2010
    Messages:
    221
    V/Deth
    I got bored with both verses when they were talking about what they were going to do and neither had spectacular metaphors or punches, but I think deth was slightly less boring. He should shorten his lines though.
    test
  17. Riot

    Riot The Dark Hero.

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2001
    Messages:
    12,505
    Deth Wins.
    test
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