Why do we always make excuses when W0MEN cheat?

Discussion in 'Ladies Lounge' started by MistaChipz, Feb 2, 2010.

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  1. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    I have no hard facts on the matter... it's just something I believe... I think we're quicker to let things go and move on... but of course, there are exceptions to every rule.
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  2. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    i never said that cheating is excusable or "ok" for anyone. over the years i have been consistent on the stance that cheating is cowardice at its peak and is in every case avoidable.

    all i said was that a good woman wouldn't leave or step out on a good man for no reason. what constitutes a "good" man is subjective...so your "not being good enough" diatribe is moot

    regardless, the point i was trying to make is that when most women cheat there IS a reason...yes a "reason" is an excuse...but it's a reason nonetheless..whereas with men, i've encountered far too many who simply have no excuse...you ask them why and they shrug or mumble some bullshit about wanting to be young. you ask them if they feel like they love their girl and they say "yes". you ask if their girl was treating them right and they say "yed"...ass backwards and with no logic.

    i feel like most men cheat out of impulse...the phone rang and they answered it. simple as that. that's why there aren't many who make excuses for them.
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  3. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    I think ppl make excuses for cheating women for a few reasons...

    women arent supposed to be sexually impulsive beings like men, they're not supposed to wanna get laid just for the hell of it. All women supposedly "naturally" desire to settle down with one mate, who can "protect and provide" for their offspring. If they screw around, there must be some deep, psychological explanation for it. It cant be just cause she got bored and wanted something new & exciting. Only men like variety [/sarcsam]

    Too, women are just coming out of an era where they were viewed as childlike dependents, not capable of being responsible/accountable for themselves. If a woman is outta picket, it must be because some compelling outside force caused her to behave that way, not like she could have possibly just been a selfish a-hole. Only men act that way. Women are too nurturing and caring [/sarcasm].

    Even still, I think society excuses cheatin men way more than they do cheatin women. Only, with men theres no need to make elaborate excuses... we're conditioned from very early on to just expect that men are prone to requiring variety and "spreading their seed", like mindless drones. Its taken for granted that all men cheat. That "all men are dogs". So when a man cheats, theres really no need to explain, we're supposed to accept/expect it. He is, after all, just "a man being a man". That sentiment is so embedded into our cultural fabric that we dont even realize that it too is just another bullshit excuse.
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  4. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    ^^ you've made some undeniable points.

    and im not gonna front, i do know some women that cannot/will not commit to just one man.

    but in my experience those women are the minority...because as you stated, for the most part women are still sexually repressed or not comfortable with their sexuality.

    i think a part of the reason why women aren't expected to cheat is because cheating, or enjoying sex [when you're a woman] equates to being a whore.
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  5. Imperial1

    Imperial1 For pressed ones only

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    So true. Like a man consistently getting his dick wet by any and everything he sees is not whorish activities.

    Imperial1
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  6. RapCritik

    RapCritik New Member

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    Men cheat to get as many women as possible.

    Women cheat to get the best man possible.

    Both men and women cheat. You decide which motive is more righteous.
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  7. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    I never said that you did.

    The same is true for your definition of a "good" woman... you're telling me something I already know. Besides, you first introduced the notion of a "good" man in this convo.

    My counter to you is why can't a woman make a bad decision and leave a "good" man? Without a good reason, other than pure selfishness and/or insatiability? Why is that so hard for you to accept? Your premise presupposes the notion that a woman never makes a mistake and that she is always able to recognize a "good" man. I disagree completely. If you want to harp on the semantics of "good," then we can go in circles on this. But going by what you and I probably consider "good," why can't this happen for you?

    Just because the cheating men you've encountered couldn't articulate a "reason" or "excuse" valid enough for you to accept on a level that you have rationalized for women does not mean that the difference between men and women cheating is so vast that it needs to be assigned one of inferiority and superiority.

    My suggestion to you is that you either get more experiences or try to acquire more knowledge on the real nature of cheating and relationships.
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  8. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    hyper-fucking-sensitive.

    at what point did i say that all women are more valid in their cheating?? let alone say that one gender was "better" or "worse"...go quote that part of my rhetoric and bold that shit. you're sooo bent on not being "man bashed" that you're twisting the words i type in clear plain english. imma type it again: stop putting words in my mouth.

    the question was simple: why do people make excuses for women cheating. my answer was simple: because women GIVE excuses...whereas men dont.

    im pretty secure in my experiences, grandpa. but thanks for managing to make it through one discussion with me without condescending...


    and you're right, we could talk in circles. but we wont.
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  9. thedream233

    thedream233 Thrillmatic

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    okay, I'm jumping in this one.


    First of all, no matter what there is always some kind of reason people (be they man or women) cheat. The reason might not be apparent, but its there, whether the man is selfish, the woman is selfish, whether the man or woman wants revenge, whether they arent getting satisfied, there is always some kind of reason. Sometimes its given, sometimes the reason is not given (again, I'm talking about both sexes) so enough of this women give reasons and men dont bullshit.

    another thing, your comment about a good woman not leaving a good man without a good reason is also bullshit.

    One of the biggest things I've learned about females is that in a relationship, theres nothing worse than a bored woman. If a woman is bored in a relationship it doesnt matter how much money the man brings home, how well he takes care of the kids or how many times a month he brings his woman flowers, a woman will look for excitement any way she can.

    I honestly thing that boredom is a pitiful excuse for cheating for either sex, but thats just the way it is for some people
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  10. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    I see it all the time. I called it "The Desperate Housewife Syndrome". And women do leave good men for all kinds of reasons, not all of them legitimate. Women make shitty choices too.
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  11. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    Sammi, now you're being disingenious and dishonest, so I won't continue this.

    And "grandpa?" Yet you're calling me hyper-sensitive? Where is my emotion? I destroy flimsy arguments with reason and intellect... not name-calling and curse words. Guess the kitchen got too hot for you? It's okay. You're not up for this.

    You and I both know what you wrote. I've repeated it so many times already and you still couldn't give a reasonable answer. No amount of non sequitirs will cover up your lack of a defense.
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  12. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    Try telling this to your girlfriend over there... she can't seem to accept it from me, being that I'm a man who doesn't suck up to women and make excuses for their actions and all.
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  13. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    no one said i didn't let my emotions flare. does that negate the fact that you twisted every one of my posts, made exaggerations about the things i posted, and straight up ignored certain parts of my posts when it was convenient for you??

    admit it: you are bent on not feeling inferior to females or being too sympathetic to females [a recurring theme amongst your many arguments] and as a result you misinterpreted my words and ignored me when i corrected you. [see post below]

    back on page one i said it in clear plain english: EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES...everyone would include females...my only point is NOT that females are justified in their cheating...but that most men do not know how to articulate their rationale for cheating. that was my POINT.

    my OPINION was that a woman will not leave a good man for no good reason...thats my opinion based off MY experiences...no one was trying to argue that. The Dream said he's seen countless women throw away good relationships...I've seen the exact opposite. Who's right? Who's wrong?...I stated what I felt, and you tried to argue my opinion which is ridiculous and asinine.

    cut the fucking check...you know you have a habit of talking down to me because you feel like you've been around the block more, know more, whatever the fuck. the fact is you read me wrong, and decided to argue with me because you didn't want me or anyone else to say that it's "ok" for women to cheat.
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  14. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    lmao.

    the defense rests.
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  15. thedream233

    thedream233 Thrillmatic

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    But you cant help but wonder why so many people in this thread disagree with your statement?
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  16. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    It's useless, dream... her ego won't let her admit defeat.

    She was caught and tried to sidestep and backpeddle by accusing me of ignoring irrelevant information.

    She restated her original statement 3 times, but with more words added to it to try the change the original meaning.

    If you challenge her, this is what she will do to you, as well.
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  17. That Nigga

    That Nigga aka Hot Shyt

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  18. RapCritik

    RapCritik New Member

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    Samii So Sexii ....

    You're absolutely right.

    The thing is, different women have different views on what's a "good reason" to leave a man, and further, different women have different views even on what a "good man" is.

    When you understand this fact, logic will tell you that a given woman can leave a given man for any reason.

    EDIT** Anyway Samii your mother taught you that saying for a reason. Your mother comes from a generation where women needed men to get by in the world as women weren't allowed to do for themselves. So if a woman found a man who brought in money and didn't beat them, she stuck with him through anything. It's about a woman's survival. These days women are allowed to do a bit more for themselves in the world and don't need men for survival, unlike your mother's generation. So you're free to pick and choose between men until you find someone you think is perfect for you. If he farts too much and you're always holding you're breath, leave his ass. You won't go to hell....
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  19. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    Samii's like 18... her mother is probably still in her 30s... she's from MY generation... he he... j/k Samanthia... love ya!

    The generation you're referring to would be the baby boomers or earlier... women in their 60s or later.
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  20. RapCritik

    RapCritik New Member

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    well, Ig, it stands to reason that Samii's mother was told that saying by Sammi's grandmother, who herself was told by Samii's great-grandmother .... and so on....

    My point was that the saying originates from an earlier generation of womanhood. I'm not saying that Samii's mother is the woman who invented it.
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