When people say...

Discussion in 'Ladies Lounge' started by tight-eyes, Jul 13, 2006.

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  1. Konscious

    Konscious Resident Sage

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    It makes me mad, too, because... where were these hoes at when I was in middle school? All of my teachers were ugly old hags. he he

    Seriously though, it's a travesty.
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  2. Skrybe

    Skrybe ConnectedthruaForeignExch

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    ^
    LOL I'm sayin, homie! Best looking teacher I had was 3rd grade. Who gon' get some in 3RD GRADE?! It ain't even right. And then I hit 11th grade and what do the girls get? The male math teacher that's like "I hit the gym at least 6 days a week." WTF? Conspiracy theory, for real ....


    But yeah, this whole thing really is one of the more .... "interesting" talking points in the double standard discussion. I rarely bring it up - mainly because of the exact reason I already brought up, which is that the dirty deed gets blown off by others as "something guys want anyway." Hmmm ....
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  3. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    It may be a double standard, but when you consider the gender of most politicians, lawyers & judges... you have to ask yourself who set the precedent for these "standards" in the first place.

    And I agree with you Skrybe, many men are all too happy to accept that double stardard, themselves... to do otherwise would be to challenge the premise of some of the other sexual double-standards that a lot of those men use & benefit from.

    I think child molesters are equally disgusting, regardless of gender.
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  4. Konscious

    Konscious Resident Sage

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    I don't understand... why point out that most of the justice officials are male in the context of discussing why female criminals get off way easier than men?

    But these are little boys we're talking about... not men.

    I would be crucified if I were to say that little girls are happy that grown men come on to them or vice versa... even though when I was 17-18, I couldn't tell you the number of 13 or 14-year-old girls lying about their age in order to date me or some of my friends.
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  5. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    Twice in this thread the issuse of double-standards with regard to legal rights was brought up... If the females are getting off easier, I think its important to consider who it is that primarily creates & enforces the laws that allow them to... and why.

    I believe some of the underlying assumption, with regard to women getting off easier than men, lies in the notion that woman are overtly emotional, hormonally guided creatures that aren't as capable as men of thinking rationally and thus aren't held to stand accountable for their actions in the way that men are... like the PMS argument you brought up a minute ago, which we both agree is pure and utter bullshit.


    I understand that the victims in these crime are little boys, but we're talking about the mindsets of the grown men (& women) who perpetuate these stereotypes, and legally so. I believe the sexual double-standards we hold - that place men as the sexual aggressors and encourage men to seek indiscriminate sex, with women as the passive objects of mens' lustful desires - lead directly into double-standards of sexual victimization. See the connection? I'll be back to elaborate more when I get out of class.

    Like I said, we need to examine the legal precedent that has been set for these kinds of cases... and how it came about.
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  6. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    check this out: http://www.malesurvivor.org/myths.htm

    Myth #1 - Boys and men can't be victims.

    This myth, instilled through masculine gender socialization and sometimes referred to as the "macho image," declares that males, even young boys, are not supposed to be victims or even vulnerable. We learn very early that males should be able to protect themselves. In truth, boys are children - weaker and more vulnerable than their perpetrators - who cannot really fight back. Why? The perpetrator has greater size, strength, and knowledge. This power is exercised from a position of authority, using resources such as money or other bribes, or outright threats - whatever advantage can be taken to use a child for sexual purposes.


    Myth #4 - Boys are less traumatized by the abuse experience than girls.

    While some studies have found males to be less negatively affected, more studies show that long term effects are quite damaging for either sex. Males may be more damaged by society's refusal or reluctance to accept their victimization, and by their resultant belief that they must "tough it out" in silence.


    Myth #7 - If the perpetrator is female, the boy or adolescent should consider himself fortunate to have been initiated into heterosexual activity.

    In reality, premature or coerced sex, whether by a mother, aunt, older sister, baby-sitter or other female in a position of power over a boy, causes confusion at best, and rage, depression or other problems in more negative circumstances. To be used as a sexual object by a more powerful person, male or female, is always abusive and often damaging.

    Believing these myths is dangerous and damaging.

    - So long as society believes these myths, and teaches them to children from their earliest years, sexually abused males will be unlikely to get the recognition and help they need.

    - So long as society believes these myths, sexually abused males will be more likely join the minority of survivors who perpetuate this suffering by abusing others.

    - So long as boys or men who have been sexually abused believe these myths, they will feel ashamed and angry.

    - And so long as sexually abused males believe these myths they reinforce the power of another devastating myth that all abused children struggle with: that it was their fault. It is never the fault of the child in a sexual situation - though perpetrators can be quite skilled at getting their victims to believe these myths and take on responsibility that is always and only their own.
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  7. Konscious

    Konscious Resident Sage

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    So what you're saying is that you agree that these whores need to be locked under the jail, too, right? No special treatment, no PPD escapes, no insanity defenses, correct?

    I'll be back later to expound on the other points.
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  8. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    Yes, I agree that those women need to be prosecuted according to their crime, not their "gender".
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  9. Skrybe

    Skrybe ConnectedthruaForeignExch

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    Gotta admit, I nodded my head hard on this one, for real. I heavily agree. Long as you agree that both sides tend to try and use double standards to their advantage when they can. ("Of course I'm not good at cooking. I'm a MAN!" "He ought to hold the door open for me. I'm a woman!")

    It just irritates me when people complain about double standards, but use every chance they get to act on those double standards - when it'll be beneficial to them. I admit, I've been guilty of it before myself, but I try to stay away from it these days. I'm not saying you're trying to take advantage of a double standard by getting aggravated when someone says that women are more emotional than men; I'm just saying don't flip the script when you have an opportunity to use that double standard to your advantage, because I've seen a lot of people (women and men) do it a lot.


    LOL Just to play the devil's advocate, I think I'll go ahead and add that I've been in a few relationships where some wrong things were said and done, and I've had a few female friends of my exes come up to me and explain what was going on with the ex. As it turns out, I've never had one of my male friends go up to an ex and say "Well, the real problem was that Skrybe was just really emotional that day ..."

    :bounce:
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  10. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    No diggity, Skurbee. I'm just as guilty of it as the next. I'm not exempt from any of the shit I talk about... I make mistakes, too... so I wasn't speaking from a point of self-righteousness... just throwing some info out there for people to really think about.

    I can be a hypocrite, too... I'll use a double standard to my advantage when it suits me, but I know its wrong... and, like you, I work hard to change that behavior because I know better. Thats the shitty thing about "knowing better", you then actually have to apply that knowledge and do[/i] better. Sucks :-/
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  11. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    Man, Konscious was rippin' shit in this thread... still, no BBG to be found.
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  12. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    Give it a rest, dude... lol. *smh*
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  13. yea you was ripping shit cus I weren't here you chauvaunistic self-righteous neanderthal.
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  14. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    ^Name-calling is so juvenile... I thought you were better than that, BBG?

    Must be the estrogen acting up again?
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