WEST: 6. Pent up and SteveThaGreat -VS- 7. UFO and Brit Boi -V- 1. D.I.C. and Ribo

Discussion in 'RSTL Grudge Matches and Tournaments' started by DiC GeTs GuLLy, Aug 21, 2006.

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  1. DiC GeTs GuLLy

    DiC GeTs GuLLy Hello

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    [​IMG]


    The Standard League Rules will be Enforced in the Tag Tournament

    Due Dates

    VERSES DUE: Friday 12:00am PST/3:00am EST
    Verses posted after the deadline will not count!

    VOTES DUE Sunday: 12:00am PACIFIC/3:00 Midnight EST
    Votes posted after the deadline will not count!

    • Check-in (Posting in your match to show that you are aware the match exists) is encouraged but not required.
    • Verses must incorporate at least one of the provided topics and must be at least 16 lines and must not exceed 64 lines.
    • Anyone who does not post at least 4 rap lines, incorporating at least one of the provided topics, is considered a no-show.
    • During check-in, you can ask your opponent to agree to a line limit (Minimum 16) and if your opponent agrees, Moderators will hold both participants to that limit.
    • Posting between 4-15 lines is considered a “show” but will not result in a match. If you post 4-15 lines, and your opponent posts between 16-64, you will lose the match but you will remain in the league. If you post 4-15 lines, and your opponent does not show, you will “Win by no-show”.

    Voting:
    • If you do not show you can still vote and post the links in your match to receive full voting points. In addition, if you do not show, yet vote on at least 4 matches (Or, every match available, should there be less than 4 matches to vote on) you will remain in the league.
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    • No second chance votes! If your vote has been edited, even it was only to hide it, your vote will not count towards the match or towards your vote requirements.
    • No bias votes! If you have a personal investment in wanting someone to lose, whether because that member voted against you once, or you just don’t like that person, whatever the reason, do not vote in the match. If have a personal investment in wanting someone to win, whether because they’re crew member, or because you want to face that person in the next week’s brackets, whatever the reason, do not vote in the match.
    • ”Bias” must be confirmed by a Moderator.
    • If there is a match which you will not be able to vote on, due to “Bias” of any type, state so within your match prior to Verses Due Deadline. If this reduces the number of matches available for you to vote on to the point where you are unable to vote on at least 4 matches, the point scale will be adjusted according to how many matches you do vote on.
    • 3-ways are inevitable. In order to provide a tie-breaker in a 3-way, you are now required to indicate in what order the contestants finished (1st, 2nd, 3rd).
      anyone who does not show or vote is suspended one week and must sign-in again to be inserted the following week.

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    If You Don't Post A Verse, You Don't Get To Vote Unless You're An Ex Champ. Ex Champs Must Vote On A Minimum Of 4 Battles For Their Votes To Count While They're Not In The League Or Have No Showed In Their Match. If They Fail To Vote On All 4 Matches Before Due Times, None Of Their Votes Will Count.
    ____________________________________________________________________

    I Have No Problem With Crew Votes, But I'm Going To Limit Them To 2 Crew Votes Per Match Because Any More Than That Seems Severely Biased And It's Only Fair To Not Be Cluttering Your Crew Mates Match With Votes. Any More Than 2 Crew Votes And None Of The Crew Votes Will Count At All. Got To Keep Shit Fair And This Has Been An Obvious Problem Of The Past.



    TOPICS: http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread.php?t=1004335
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  2. SteveThaGreat

    SteveThaGreat Zeus

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2006
    Messages:
    37
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  3. UFO the Phoenix

    UFO the Phoenix I DONT BELIEVE IN ALIENS!

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 1999
    Messages:
    2,986
    I'm here....due friday ok....get at me Boi
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  4. Pent uP

    Pent uP I'd Like to Fight Ten Men

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2001
    Messages:
    14,147
    Idiot Savant

    StevetheGreat/

    Pent uP

    the eulogy's complete, of a kid who was unusually unique/
    his talents eclipsed by trickles of drool upon his cheek/
    from youth Drew grew to be a freak, so he was teased by the others/
    they would squeeze at his blubber...
    and they fell down laughing on their knees as he stuttered/
    but the real reason he suffered... his tv had The Apollo on screen/
    and Drew was hurt 'cause he didn't know how to follow his dreams/
    he took the little pride he had left, and swallowed it clean/
    practiced with bottles and rings, but he'd need some help to make it/
    so Drew told his mom a secret he'd kept to himself for ages/

    Though tellin her he felt debative, Drew subconciously knew
    She saw him tossin these tools and how folks stopped mocking the drool
    When he caught what he threw, so at first he offered three clues
    But then stopped the persuit and claimed juggling is what he wanted to do
    And he needed to drop out of school because he felt too stupid to learn
    Trudging behind a few steps a turn he was dubbed a nuisance and squirm
    Wanted to be of use to the world against his moms prudest concerns
    Arguing a pleasure recieved that he claims, 'you couldn't earn'
    She said, 'if u do this and burn, your home will always be here'
    So he commenced practicing for Apollo each year

    that's when Pablo appeared, a demon-child who despised the retarded/
    soon as Drew tried to get started, Pablo would decide that it's garbage/
    Drew began to cry, then he farted... and all the kids laughed in disgust/
    they were savagely rough, Pablo said, "your retarded ass should give up"/
    Drew responded, "s-s-stop trashing my stuff!" but the sonning continued/
    and he almost quit except for something as simple...
    as a promise he made mom to never stop till he was stunning the venues/
    when he got his chance Drew trembled, at The Apollo feeling like he made it/
    the crowd sat in amazement, motionless as if they needed to stare...
    as a retard juggled 20 different objects.. 50 fucking feet in the air/

    He competed with flair even while pissing in bottles he juggled
    Being no more than modestly humble he was still caught in these struggles
    As Pablo trashed his act his head sought to be hung low
    But as hecklers got ideas, Drew cracked and went awkwardly gung-ho
    Knocking tennis balls with bottles, sending them at his hawkers
    Giving the crowd black eyes like antiquing with magic markers
    The rest of the crowd thought it was part of his act
    So they started to clap, as he turned maniacal with a retarded ass laugh
    Security barged in with straps aiming to grab his arms in a flash
    Drew tried thwarting the trap and ended up with ten darts in his scalp

    in the ambulance, his heart went to flat... and his mother was pissed/
    they killed her stuttering prince, so someone would suffer for this/
    she'd had enough of this shit, and she had plans to get even/
    she went to Pablo's house and demanded the reason...
    he turned around and ran like a heathen.. she chased him with passion/
    spectators were amazed with the action, then she basically grabbed 'em/
    now he's facing this madame, cheeks drenched with fearful tears/
    she gets one of her son's juggling knives and cuts him ear to ear/
    it all appeared as weird, but since everyone knew she'd done it...
    she wiped the blade off and slid it cleanly through her stomach/

    and as her world grew less sunlit, she saw trails from headlights
    that sailed at chest height until she was impaled by deaths vice
    the awestruck crowd prayed for their lives as the driver pulled his E-Brake
    and again he hit the doomed lady straight on as rage fueled the retake
    When his delusion escaped he headed for Pablo's Lifeless Corpse
    whom was white as ghosts, and when he noticed he cried with force
    and though love and hate compile remorse, that thin line is coarse
    add some blind emotions to recieve catastrophe defined as wars
    whether its an inner Fight, or external calamity
    knowledge is still half the battle, and turmoil cant stand the heat

    Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
    H. G. Wells
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  5. UFO the Phoenix

    UFO the Phoenix I DONT BELIEVE IN ALIENS!

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 1999
    Messages:
    2,986
    [​IMG]


    The Boom Box and B Boy

    By: Brit Boi Gee & U.F.O. the Phoenix

    I am the rhythm of the dance, the urban snare fox,
    I’m the boy’s foundation he stands on as he pop-locks,
    Inside me I am the guide, the beat, the vibe,
    I bring the boy back to life like an electric slide
    I’m the first voice of the youth; I’m like hip-hop's chorus
    Even if the ballads turn black, then my music will mourn us.
    In the streets, we stand in the heat while they gazing,
    At my partner busting moves on the pavement
    Awe struck, dumbfounded at the sight of block-hop,
    He using the fifth element, I’m like his stop clock.
    He dances without an edge, the music keeps him humble
    as the calico of the clothes brighten up the bundle
    of faces that gather around bringing life to hip-hop
    I’m just the DJ in the corner making the beat drop
    The atmospheres electric, the scene is projected
    on the people moving toward something truly eclectic
    the magnificent prolific, sounds of the monolithic
    boom box pumping out loud beats and lyrics
    Drowning out cynics, with symbols and bass,
    I’m the transistor, the concertino, and the driving pace
    I’m the thud, the scratching, the voice of a race
    the creativity, the individuality, the time the space
    that he moves in, but we occupy the same chamber,
    You could say I’m more than just his cd changer.


    I am the breaker of gravity controlling
    The universe within my shoes, no stranger
    To the solar system as I mimic its tools
    Son in the middle under the moon
    You don’t know my wisdom
    Death defying and petrifying all my victims
    Twitching to the kick drums
    With paroxysmal warm ups
    Until I get crunk to the music
    Then jump into the circle and go nuts
    Spirit catches the beat as I leave my feet
    Away from concrete certainty
    And spin my legs in organized confusion
    On the card board
    Provided as safety’s illusion
    Letting my head roll along with
    Unplanned cartwheels
    To make the crowd go “oooh!!!”
    With my stop freeze and start skills
    Commanding all attention to the middle
    With more flavors then basket robins and skittles
    Combine; see my combos are beyond ill
    Bystanders get dizzy from this
    Human windmill
    Guaranteed to send chills down the spine
    Of all observers
    So come prepare to witness a controlled
    Tornado
    And Katrina’s just the name of my X girlfriend
    So you know I raise hell
    But this ain’t new Orleans
    It’s a block party omen
    Street jam performing
    A rock steady vet where the brave dwell
    Wearing no gang cloths
    But throwing up sets
    Writing invisible graffiti
    With urban sign language
    I’m type dangerous
    In the center of the circle
    Rotating off my axis
    Like the earth on steroids
    I do the electric puppet
    No strings attached
    Just an imagination untapped
    I’m a B boy
    Stand back
    When I dance
    Matrix running man
    Robot funny pants
    Pulse in and out my stance
    With everybody’s hands in the air
    Giving me praise in advance
    With a cadence chant
    Til every sentence collapse
    And all column breaks
    Poetry in motion, can’t wait
    Napoleon Dynamite meets Harlem shake
    cabbage-patch cali bounce
    Tongue tilted out the mouth
    Arms cross saying what!!!!!
    Respect the dance moves!!!!!
    Mad faith in yourself
    Is all it takes, calm face
    Fancy footwork toe jam Labor Day
    Into the crowd silent proud
    moonwalk fade away
    ………….
    test
  6. TaLi RodrigueZ

    TaLi RodrigueZ Washed Up Rapper...

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2002
    Messages:
    4,546
    The Devil Inside (Ribo)

    [​IMG]

    The depths of hell where death and treason lie
    from the bleeding skies you might see a phoenix rise
    grip the demon's scythe takin lives, no reason why
    the heathen legion rides across the seas depleting tides
    drift from hell to earth in the time it takes to bleed
    a grave is a tool made for a fool to find his way to me
    i diminished the plight of edan, fuck livin a life of freedom
    envision the rats till you feel like the women and mice are breedin
    evil thoughts baffle ya brain keep you in shackles and chain's
    use a sword - remove ya core till only a rotten apple remains
    widowed damsel's read pleas, as I swam the dead seas
    I'd create a hole to take his soul, so his family's debt free
    providing drugs and alcohol, make it hard to stay sober,
    so when you see the light no need to fight - darkness takes over
    live within a nest of lies - an infested life source
    step aside my pet's abide or become a petrified corpse
    ill scratch your bleeding sores - make you eat a mortar
    just to keep the order so you people see a scene of horror
    reachin for a creaky door you feel the creepy aura
    of the greedy hordes of demon lords that deeply seek supporters
    you were born for evil, supporting wars that torture people
    the slightest ambition to die for religion but your source is feeble
    malevolent cries pots call themselves black pushing kettles aside
    I set them free with chemistry turning Dr Jekyl's to Hydes
    arguments settled with lies, poor families try to embezzle a prize
    met with demise - I'll keep lurkin.. each person has the devil inside



    (Dic)

    [​IMG]

    Diseases are spread by me in my head... soon I think it, they're dead
    Infecting the meager and send in the Reaper to put people to rest
    Acids eating their flesh as sewage retreats through their breath
    Until they stop breathing and drop leaving pieces of mess

    These scenes have been set across every home on the planet
    From mad cow's causing cancers to insects that roam and cause damage
    Roaches expanded from my advancement in the toxins I make
    Evolution bring resolutions for my tropical wastes
    Death is an obvious fate, but the torture's my pleasure
    Erupting through pipes, running with mice that love fucking up treasures
    My precious vermon are fed to serpants to breed evil in snakes,
    But they love the taste of meaty pets and humans that eat all their days
    Feeding their face and passion out asleep, obesity's fate
    When they awake, there's several poisonous bites through teeth of my mates
    They're my favorite to bring the sicknesses, infiltrating you're infant kids
    With wickedness, corrupting the well hearted lives of innocence
    Kindness diminishes as blemishes go from benign to malignant strips
    Eyes roll back in their tents with the entrances of DEATH sentences
    Extinctions will follow as the righteous turn into demon apostles
    Plagues are maid in hateful space to give my dreaming a throddle
    Wishes are granted, but this geenie doesn't sleep in a bottle
    I'm the boogie man, candyman and other things that are hostile
    Leave your existence behind as I sit and rip through your mind
    Reconstructing your DNA as you bleed from inside
    Peace is declined so welcome to the fortress of hell
    This is more than atale, it's where your future is forced to be jailed
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  7. Atheist

    Atheist Storyteller

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2002
    Messages:
    1,707
    [hide]Steve and Pent:
    This was a nice peice, and you wrote to the topic incredibly well. I know it's difficult for two people to drop something and go in the same directions/have the same goals etc, but you pulled it off brilliantly. This could have easily been one person writing. The story itself was decent, and the characters were developed and given their individual parts in the story. The flow was pretty amazing, except for this part;

    Drew responded, "s-s-stop trashing my stuff!" but the sonning continued/
    and he almost quit except for something as simple...
    as a promise he made mom to never stop till he was stunning the venues/


    Other than that, I don't have much else to say.

    UFO and Brit Boi:
    This was a wonderful read, and you both wrote such vivid verses full of happy scenes, etc, etc. This battle is really long, so I'm trying to keep my responses short, since I still have another three battles to vote on (sighs). This part was fantastic;

    He dances without an edge, the music keeps him humble
    as the calico of the clothes brighten up the bundle
    of faces that gather around bringing life to hip-hop
    I’m just the DJ in the corner making the beat drop
    The atmospheres electric, the scene is projected
    on the people moving toward something truly eclectic
    the magnificent prolific, sounds of the monolithic
    boom box pumping out loud beats and lyrics
    Drowning out cynics, with symbols and bass,
    I’m the transistor, the concertino, and the driving pace
    I’m the thud, the scratching, the voice of a race
    the creativity, the individuality, the time the space
    that he moves in, but we occupy the same chamber,
    You could say I’m more than just his cd changer.


    I loved how you both brought different qualities to the table because it essentially represented one of you as the boom box and the other as the b boy. That was a nice touch. UFO, I would quote some of your verse, but you had far too many quotables. It was written very poetically and, like most poetry, had a large amount of standout lines. Great verse, but you don't need me to quote some extracts.

    Dic and Ribo:
    Another great read. God damn it, this match is going to be hard to vote on in the end. Dic;

    They're my favorite to bring the sicknesses, infiltrating you're infant kids
    With wickedness, corrupting the well hearted lives of innocence
    Kindness diminishes as blemishes go from benign to malignant strips
    Eyes roll back in their tents with the entrances of DEATH sentences
    Extinctions will follow as the righteous turn into demon apostles
    Plagues are maid in hateful space to give my dreaming a throddle


    Ribo;

    widowed damsel's read pleas, as I swam the dead seas
    I'd create a hole to take his soul, so his family's debt free
    providing drugs and alcohol, make it hard to stay sober,
    so when you see the light no need to fight - darkness takes over
    live within a nest of lies - an infested life source
    step aside my pet's abide or become a petrified corpse


    Both nice extracts. Overall, this was a tough battle to vote on and, since it was so long, you can see that I didn't give me usual in depth breakdown. However, I hope no one gets offended by my decision because honestly, there was hardly anything separating either team. But I'm going to rank this match up as follows;

    1. UFO and Brit Boi
    2. Dic and Rib
    3. Steve and Pent

    Seriously, this was so difficult because everyone brought something different to the table. Pent and Steve hard a wonderful story full of character development and tragedy. Rib and Dic's verses were very dark in nature, and they wrote to their picture topics fantastically. However, I just loved reading UFO and Brit Boi's piece, because it was so full of vivid imagery. Essentially, it was a refreshing read. However, I can see this going anyway, so good luck to all of you.[/hide]
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  8. Insanevillian

    Insanevillian STILL in CHARGE

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2000
    Messages:
    16,814
    [hide]vote dic and ribo...

    i like the darkness of this piece and this is the best piece ive read so far this week...

    brit and b boy were close i liked the poetry in motion in that piece and the first piece by pent up was interesting, as it took a more real approach, but the last piece did it for me...

    the death and reaper vibe totally had me wanting to go out and kill people...

    sike. but anyways, thas how i see um...

    [/hide]

    [/hide]
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  9. Annihilation

    Annihilation CLAUS HOUSE

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2003
    Messages:
    458
    [hide]
    Pent up & Steve

    This was a really creative story, in retrospect having read all 3 this is the only verse that's attempting to tell a story, definitely the most ambitious of the three. It comes off as a flawless story, all 3 teams here came nicely together but I think Pent and Steve were the most congealed as it was a seamless transition from stanza to stanza or whatever the fuck u call it, the writing was nice with good vocab, really nice flow and scheme with lotta multis.

    The story was interesting, creative, ambitious and flawed. It had great developemtn of the protagonist with a very creative road to apollo with an almost Adaptation. like ending, however it isnt perfect. The ending was confusing at first, it felt contrived and slightly idiotic in its overt simplicity, however it does come off well in terms of its relation to the quote/topic at the end illustrating a nice point. It's at times very emotional but then spoiling moments that could be capitalized upon, like when Drew's mother dies she says "in the ambulance, his heart went to flat... and his mother was pissed", pissed? WTF, what kind of piss poor description is that, some moments were well achieved while others went the other way. Overall a very good verse.

    UFO & Brit Boi:

    The strong point of this verse is the total immersion and staying on topic and really painting a vivid portrait of the whole scene, you guys fleshed it out nicely and approached it well. The writing and vocab were nice, the flow was okay but it had alot of simple scheme and soft rhymes with no multis, for such short lines the flow should have been alot better, there's no excuse for it, part of writing rap is being inventive in what u want to say and how u phrase it so i lands on a hard rhyme, that's straight lazyness or ineptitude. I think tho, the verse accomplished it's intended purpose and fulfilled the topic chosen. While not very ambitious in that respect, it does what it does well, and I can appreciate that. Good verse.

    DIC and Ribo

    I thought both partners really were on the same page here as well, each fleshing out the image and staying perfectly on topic like UFO and Brit Boi. The scheme was dope, great flow and the imagery was very vivid with some nice lines, especially Ribo who I think came a lil stronger, although both were tight. This was a really nice collab, didn't set out that ambitious either, but really accomplished their topic at a very high level and creating a very entertaining piece. Wonderfully scripted.

    The Verdict

    While I thought Brit Boi and UFO came with a nice piece, the scheme and flow really limited the appeal of the piece, despite it's nice approach and great illustration, as it directly competed with DIC and Ribo which took the same sort of image description approach and nailed it with a hot flow and really terrific description with some nice quotables and staying on point, which is in contention with Pent and Steve's verse for the top vote. Both had nice schemes and flow, both were well written, and while DIC's had a more superficial appeal in terms of straight up instant gratification in terms of imagery and writing, Pent's and Steve's definitely grew on me the second read around as the whole creative picture came together, a much more ambitious and fresh story that was well done, even with its flaws.

    Vote: Pent up and Steve the great
    [/hide]
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  10. Annihilation

    Annihilation CLAUS HOUSE

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2003
    Messages:
    458
    [hide]
    1. Pent up
    2. DIC
    3. Brit Boi
    [/hide]
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  11. Pent uP

    Pent uP I'd Like to Fight Ten Men

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2001
    Messages:
    14,147
    ^^IV's vote doesn't count as it doesnt not provide 2 lines for each verse
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  12. Shrug

    Shrug Street Poet

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2005
    Messages:
    158
    [hide]props to all i really could see that all of you put down an effort to drop on this. I must give it to Pent uP and SteveThaGreat on this one tho. Topic utilization, flow, rhyme scheme, multis were off the HOOK, opener, closer, all dope. not that the others werent as dope. UFO and brit boi, your piece was so respectable. great idea off that jason bua painting. i actually have that painting in my room chillin so it was great to see someones vision off that. It was a long hard road to read which made me tired. the piece was right up there with pents and steves but it was lacking something that theirs obtained. i cant quite put my finger on it but regardless it was there. DIC and ribo your verses gave me nightmares. the piece seemed a bit chopped. ideas and notions were all over. you had some dope liners and multis but it didnt grab me the same. vote is
    1. Pent up and steve the great
    2. ufo and brit boi
    3. dic and ribo[/hide]
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  13. Shrug

    Shrug Street Poet

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2005
    Messages:
    158
    [hide] props to all i really could see that all of you put down an effort to drop on this. I must give it to Pent uP and SteveThaGreat on this one tho. Topic utilization, flow, rhyme scheme, multis were off the HOOK, opener, closer, all dope. not that the others werent as dope. UFO and brit boi, your piece was so respectable. great idea off that jason bua painting. i actually have that painting in my room chillin so it was great to see someones vision off that. It was a long hard road to read which made me tired. the piece was right up there with pents and steves but it was lacking something that theirs obtained. i cant quite put my finger on it but regardless it was there. DIC and ribo your verses gave me nightmares. the piece seemed a bit chopped. ideas and notions were all over. you had some dope liners and multis but it didnt grab me the same. vote is

    1. Pent uP and SteveTheGreat
    2. UFO and Brit Boi
    3. DIC AND Ribo

    great job you guys.[/hide]
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  14. DiC GeTs GuLLy

    DiC GeTs GuLLy Hello

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2005
    Messages:
    2,962
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  15. Pent uP

    Pent uP I'd Like to Fight Ten Men

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2001
    Messages:
    14,147
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  16. Pent uP

    Pent uP I'd Like to Fight Ten Men

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2001
    Messages:
    14,147
    UFO/Brit - 1+3+2 = 6
    DIC/Ribo - 2+2+3 = 7
    Pent/Steve - 3+1+1 = 5

    Pent/Steve win
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