[Week 5] [Championship] C. MC Guttso (4-0) vs. 2. Ace the Prophet (3-1)(VOTE!)

Discussion in 'The Rapmusic Storytelling/Topical League' started by T.a.C, May 4, 2009.

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  1. T.a.C

    T.a.C Guest

    [​IMG]



    WEEK 5



    VERSUS DUE: Every Friday @ 11:59 PM EST
    LINE LIMIT: Minimum of 16 lines, Maximum of 64
    ** NO RECYCLING, NO EXCEPTIONS **
    •Recycling is the equivalent to that of a no-show and will be treated as such, thus resulting in a loss in favor of the participant whom chose to recycle and a win in favor of his/her opponent
    •Extensions may only be granted if a moderator has given consent prior to a verse being posted in the match OR your opponent gives his consent
    •If granted, the extension will override deadline for both participants extending it for no more than 24 hours
    •CHECK-INS are encouraged, but not required
    •Verses MUST incorporate AT LEAST 1 of the provided topics or pictures
    •A failure to show will result in a loss and a sign out by default
    •If your opponent fails to show, you MUST STILL post AT LEAST 5 lines (4-15) AND 3 voting links in order to claim victory
    •A Championship Title WILL NOT be decided by way of no-show!!!
    •If an opponent fails to show in a Championship match, the remaining participant will be ranked as the number 1 seed, but will not be considered a Champion until a win by vote
    •Upon your second no show, you will be suspended for two weeks of competition. A third no show will result in a three week suspension and a fourth will result in a suspension for the remainder of the season. There is no suspension for first time no showers.
    • Competitors are limited to posting 3 times in their own match, which allows for checking in, posting votes, and posting a verse. For each post over 3 unless deemed necessary by the mods, the competitor will be docked one vote.
    • Each competitor may only post once in another competitors battle allowing for a vote and nothing more, if you would like an explanation or to explain as to why a vote was cast a certain way, you can pm them or point things out properly in the vote to begin with. Violating this will result in losing a vote in your match.
    • A verse can be edited if and only if it is the first verse to be posted and the other verse has yet to be posted or it is the second verse posted and a vote has yet to be received.
    • Members found constantly disruptive to the league will have their sign-in ignored.
    TOPICS ARE IN THE MAG

    test
  2. Ace the Prophet

    Ace the Prophet A Prophet to the Game

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2005
    Messages:
    4,343
    Checkin in. Good luck Guttso!
    test
  3. MC Guttso

    MC Guttso Fingers in Pies

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2006
    Messages:
    480
    test
  4. MC Guttso

    MC Guttso Fingers in Pies

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2006
    Messages:
    480
    “Natural abilities are like natural plants, they need pruning by study”​


    From the rock legends who play their guitars,
    To crooked felons who steal money and cars,
    Driving fast past the last lonely man at the bar,
    With his farfetched thoughts of travels to Mars,
    He finds it hard coz he can’t look the part - but
    It all starts with a dream to reach for the stars,
    Development happens by taking a chance,
    We grow our talents like our natural plants,

    So I dance whilst my heart’s bleeding,
    And I see it’s philosophically pleasing
    To smoke my weed at the weekend,
    And my brain’s feeling good to
    Be free with my street friends,

    Nurturing talents in the challenging seasons,
    Turn my strength to give me some meaning and
    Find my reasons to change feelings of pretence,
    Things aren’t always what they are seeming,
    So we all need to follow in what we believe in,

    Being an empty shell, blank page, a clean slate
    Life’s full of templates for ways to behave,
    Innate drives begin to shape and create our fate,
    We all play a role in the path that we take,
    Right or wrong it’s either make or break, and
    I’m amazed at the state of the world today,
    Folks low in the gutter think there’s no escape,
    ‘Coz they’re neglected by effects of societal rape,

    Class constraints create unsightly groups,
    Kids born into wealth have the easier routes,
    And all the fools follow hot career pursuits
    Whilst the rest fight for school and food,
    To get fucked was the only thing that we knew,
    Shoot-up and take drugs, that’s what we would do,

    But even the top formed their own crews,
    To boost the power only held by a few,
    Boot camps of troops sent for wrong feuds,
    It’s not new to invade and complain it’s taboo,
    So I campaign for you to search for the truth,
    Stay true to yourself and not what you consume,
    Be the proof that anything can be achieved,
    If you have a passion in what you believe,
    And have the guts to teach what you preach.
    test
  5. Ace the Prophet

    Ace the Prophet A Prophet to the Game

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2005
    Messages:
    4,343
    Hey Guttso, I'm probably gonna need an extension til Saturday, man. Might have time to finish it up tomorrow night but I'm not sure if I will be able to, so I'm asking for one now, just incase, if that's chill with you
    test
  6. MC Guttso

    MC Guttso Fingers in Pies

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2006
    Messages:
    480
    Ok. That's cool. You've got to do what you've got to do.
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  7. Ace the Prophet

    Ace the Prophet A Prophet to the Game

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2005
    Messages:
    4,343
    If you’re going thru Hell, keep on going.”- Winston Churchill

    What is life? Mine’s been twisted around in so many ways that I can’t even tell you the times I’ve felt the need to take a line or drink and think it’ll all be ok. Just a shot of Jose and a couple of beers can take away the troubling tears that I’ve feared for the past couple of years. Cuz the Hell that I’ve felt is confusing and bruising my health. Nothing is clear. Something is near…


    See, I was seventeen, sneaking into the vicinity
    Of a girl who was too eager to give up her virginity
    And I was too anxious to accept
    The sex became everything Daddy’s Little Angel could expect
    Whenever I’d let my hands creep onto her neck
    Then slide onto her breasts and lead her to the bed
    As the feelings of her climax lingered to her head
    It’s the best drug she didn’t need a needle to inject
    So with that I was hidden from her family
    Stashed within her closet, dressed up less than casually
    Imagining exactly just how savagely her parents would react to me
    Oh, such a damaging catastrophe
    Is coming after me and I’m not sure what to do
    Her grandfather’s hated me since World War Two
    And her family won’t approve of the color of my skin
    I’m too American to become one of their kin
    But I’m addicted to this drug of lust
    And we said that it was love, so we felt it was enough to trust
    The physical qualities of what became reality
    So we snuck behind their backs, that feeling would empower me
    To think there’s not a way in the world we were ever gettin caught
    I don’t think the sex had ever been as hot
    As it was on that day when heaven became hell
    And it strung the devil right outta this angel
    You see, it started when she said that if I love her
    That I’d show up to her house with a brand new bunch of rubbers
    And an oil for massages so that I could rub her down
    And whipped cream to lick off her, we didn’t fuck around
    So I obliged to obtain all of our necessities
    “This had to be a dream, God must be blessing me
    This ecstasy is heavenly and it should never end”
    Little did I know that this Hell would then begin

    I rushed my ride to her house, much too eager to start
    Quickly parked, jumped out and locked my keys up in the car
    But simply shrugged it off, I would deal with it later
    Sex was at my fingertips, the feeling is contagious
    I crept in through the basement and snuck myself upstairs
    Every step was silent like I wasn’t even there
    So her parents didn’t hear me as I slipped into her room
    And got consumed with her aura with just a hint of her perfume
    And a lesser hint of clothes as she slipped outta her robe
    And fresh shower water quickly trickled to her toes
    Next thing you know I had her on the floor
    When a knock-knock-knock came rockin’ on the door
    “Who the fuck is in there?” He yelled in Vietnamese
    When he kicked down the door and killed our ecstasy
    Right then he threatened me and I’m not sure what he said
    But my hands on his daughter’s how his fury was bred
    He kicked me in the chest and connected every punch
    Til my blood-soaked face stayed wetter than a sponge
    I barely even budged til he claimed he’d go get his firearms
    And make my lover’s bed the one I die upon!
    “But how can I escape? I can’t even drive!”
    And with that I bolted out and ran for my life
    Expecting to be shot as I ran in my back
    How I made it out alive? I just can’t picture that


    And so it began...this trip through Hell which God has chosen to expel on my life until I decide I can find what’s right. Almost 3 years to the day and it’s still hard to make things clear, look in the mirror and ask who am I? A year ago I nearly drove a girl to suicide over the same drug named love. And recently I was the first to sleep with a girl who claimed she was celibate. Neither of us remember it. I’m in the 7th Layer and I don’t know if I’ll ever care.

    Cuz each and every day I’m creepin’ more into Hell
    But with every step I take’s another story to tell
    test
  8. L. Kross

    L. Kross His Highness

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2000
    Messages:
    23,268
    Guttso - Feelin the concept, one of the few cats that didnt choose Churchill. Great topic, nice imagery, good use of vocab. Shit was deep too, I like deep serious relateable material. Good show this week.

    Ace - Lol, fuck you for makin sex into one of the worst stories you have to tell. Go read my damn topical on this same subject lmao. One more thing, I woulda beat the shit out of the dad, fucked his daughter on his unconcious body. Lmao, okay okay on to the actual verse

    Great mechanics, loved the rhyme schemes, story was pretty descriptive, flowed good, you didnt get caught up anywhere nice job story tellin. The rhyme patters where also off the charts. Especially in those beginnin an endin pieces. You have the early signs of a genius writer. Keep doin that.

    This is a real close call, Guttso's story is way deeper an alot more relevant to most, but Ace's story was still well told an well written, I think its gotta be up to mechanics an I feel Ace pulled ahead with some impressive rhyme schemes.

    Vote - Ace
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  9. .:Pain:.

    .:Pain:. Futurely J. Keeper

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2005
    Messages:
    10,368
    Guttso - Ok so I can't really hate on your mechanics anymore, because your rhyme scheme is kinda just the way you write, and it's cool if you don't wanna rhyme 5 syllables at the end of every bar, lol. Flow was good though. As far as concepts, you did a real good job of staying with the topic and relating everything back to nature and the upkeep of plants. I would've liked to see some more unexpected concepts though, and more relations back to nature. For some reason, I found these two lines to be the dopest though
    Real clever use of words there.
    Overall, it was a real dope verse, but I think the concept could have been more prevalent and the overall concepts inside the piece could have been developed a bit more.


    AtP - That conversational opener with the rhymes was real dope and I hope everyone read it, cuz it sets up your verse perfectly. As far as your actual story went, it was a good narrator's voice. The storytelling was as straightforward as can be. I would add more abstract thought into it, more poetic devices, more symbolism. This line was pretty dope though
    The thing is, it was just like a story one of my boy's would tell me. For some that might be a good thing, but for me, it's not. When you write a story like this, using a concept that been done a lot in the past, you have to add extra personality, extra devices, extra everything to make it unlike any piece that has come before it, and you didn't really do that.

    Vote - Guttso, for the more conceptual piece...
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  10. *Iceman*

    *Iceman* New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2000
    Messages:
    3,138
    Good shit, both stayed on topic, both had original viewpoints of their topics, and both had fairly rhyming elements in their pieces...

    Guttso- I like how you freaked your topic, very well written. My personal thing though, im not down with simple rhyme schemes, just seems dated, but the piece still shined in spite of...

    Ace- Good story, grabbed me from the beginning until the end and very well told. Even though i loved that little poem thing at the start, that one and the one at the end just seem like a bit much. The story was good enough to stand on its own...

    v/Ace
    Great battle, hands down two top notch pieces this week...
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  11. Shadow

    Shadow Kotaro's Master

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2004
    Messages:
    60,689
    Wow this was verse nice....Guttso had the deep ish and Ace verse was insane...both verses were appealing but i gotta give this battle to Guttso...That deep ish touched my heart..good battle by both

    sorry for the lack of detail...mad busy moving.

    EDIT

    Guttso - It was your imagery and your attention to detail that gave you the win in this...i felt as if i were watching this as i read it. You seem to have a gnat for this kinda of thing and you felt right at home which was noticeable during throughout the verse

    Fav Lines
    So I dance whilst my heart’s bleeding,
    And I see it’s philosophically pleasing
    ^^wow

    Ace - I like how you broke up your verse...it was like a heaven and hell kinda spin which was dope...I liked the fact that even in your 'heaven' you knew/experience the hatred but it
    ex.
    Is coming after me and I’m not sure what to do
    Her grandfather’s hated me since World War Two


    I also loved how this was said
    "So her parents didn’t hear me as I slipped into her room
    And got consumed with her aura with just a hint of her perfume"

    My only problem with this was, i wanted you to describe what made this 'lust' soo addictive, i could tell you were addicted to her but i wanted you to tell me why...U describe how the actions went about but not what the appeal to her was because you described how she felt all the time..not mentioning yourself(hope that made sense)

    "See, I was seventeen, sneaking into the vicinity
    Of a girl who was too eager to give up her virginity
    And I was too anxious to accept
    The sex became everything Daddy’s Little Angel could expect
    Whenever I’d let my hands creep onto her neck"
    ^^loved


    Got Life? Please stfu..all anyone needed to say was please explain more(which MC Guttso stated) and i'll be happy to give more depth into the verse but don't give me a pissy fit ESPECIALLY since most ppl posted friday evening or late. i told u ppl i had ish to do...i have no problems give more depth
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  12. Got Life?

    Got Life? Resident Megalomaniac

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    13,681
    If any of shadow's votes are being counted, and I do mean any cause this kid is a lazy fucking goon that hasn't broken down a thing in any match beyond quoting some lines here and there then the mods in this league are goons.

    As for this battle...

    Guttso - ok so this was a cool verse for what it was though I still really don't see a strong correlation with what your verse was about and the actual topic given. Your strongest bars were definitely your opening stanza and from there the piece seemed a little lack luster and bland. Smooth flow and easy read throughout, but nothing special or memorable about this piece.

    Ace - You opened the piece up really well, but from the minute you hit the bulk of your verse you lost my interest. Pieces about sex and being lost and consumed in passion have to be passionate, also the foreshadowing of events to come by actually saying little did I know and all that is played as fuck to me. The whole piece was just boring for me and then the calloused ending fit, but since the character was already one I could give a fuck less about it didn't save the piece for me by any means.

    Vote = Guttso for having a verse that I disliked less.
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  13. Soull

    Soull New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2008
    Messages:
    506
    Interesting battle....

    Guttso - Ok, you had the lyrics/mechanics and all that down, and
    you did that with style. Definately some qoutables like :
    Driving fast past the last lonely man at the bar,
    With his farfetched thoughts of travels to Mars,

    However, I did think you didnt really do too much with the quote,
    and you seemed to stay inside your comfort zone, which is cool,
    but it definately places you at a disadvantage. Other than that,
    it was a solid verse.

    Ace - Also a solid piece, while it wasnt as emotionally engaging as Guttso's
    piece, you did a good job in story telling. I don't know if you
    intended the ending to be a twist, but the general story was
    quite predictable. Some qoutables :
    So with that I was hidden from her family
    Stashed within her closet, dressed up less than casually
    Imagining exactly just how savagely her parents would react to me
    Oh, such a damaging catastrophe

    Other that I thought it was a relatively close battle. but I think im
    going to give it to Ace, who was slightly more innovative.

    Vote - Ace
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  14. The_K3

    The_K3 ^Secksi^

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2005
    Messages:
    29,265
    guttso - u have a style that sets u apart from everyone else in this league by being technical in writing but not using the popular norm of multis, ur patters are nice thought the endin was a little weak but overall u had a nice verse although i think u coulda went on more with the quote.

    ace - good piece as well i think u coulda worded some multis differently so they woulda came out smoother i also feel u coulda went with more relation to the quote cause were talking about going thru hell and this was kinda wishy wasy at parts no offense.

    i think the verse was good i jsut think it didnt represent the quote well

    im actually undecided about this one sorry guys both were nice verses even tho i thought u could touch up on the relation to the quote
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  15. Orange407County

    Orange407County Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 2, 2005
    Messages:
    5,358
    ima vote Guttso here...that shit was sick, deep content, nice imagery, i liked it a lot and read it twice.. ace came dope until the end imo... i was expecting a more climactic ending then dude running out, shoulda closed it out all the way instead of the "keep going" aspect...lost my vote
    Posted via Mobile Device
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  16. liquid`acid

    liquid`acid gods busy can I help you?

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2005
    Messages:
    13,603
    Guttso:
    im suprised and impressed to see someone on this topic, not one of the three i expected everyone to write on, an you did a good job on it. the lines flow an rhyme together near perfect, i think there was only a couple times i had to stop an reread to ascertain how pieces fit together a couple times.

    i really liked 4th an 5th stanzas on ppl from two oposite walks of life

    but i think you could have duscussed peoples natural talents an the development of them a little bit more, like maybe the different talents that are needed to survive as the poor an rich people. simthin to think on, overall great verse


    Ace:
    un-vote related off topic. wtf @ the fonts, maybe its cuz im high as shit right now but this hurts my eyes a bit.

    first verse is killer, i like where you were goin with it, the 2nd verse fits really well with the first one but at the same time it kinda seems like you switched directions or somthen.

    it kinda seems like you got stuck at some point an changed what you were goin for or lost your concept along the way an just kept goin. which in a way is pretty sweet (on reread) it seems like this is somthin that actually hapend to you?

    "Cuz each and every day I’m creepin’ more into Hell
    But with every step I take’s another story to tell"
    soooo true



    vote = Guttso
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  17. T.a.C

    T.a.C Guest

    Guttso wins 5-3
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