We learn gender roles so young

Discussion in 'Ladies Lounge' started by Shit with corn in it IRM'S BITCH, May 21, 2007.

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  1. My friends daughter went to a wildlife park today with her school. when she got home she had a bag full of goodies, toys and pencils, and badges and some stickers etc.

    her mum was looking through the bag and she found the stickers and said:

    "they couldn't have given the butterflies to the boys"

    I was like, "whats wrong with boys having butterflies?"

    she gave me a "are u serious?" look.

    I thought it was a prime example of how notions of masculinity and femininity are created. To me, a butterfly is a fairly neutral thing thats why it struck me all the more powerfully.

    Then I thought, what is wrong really with girls having butterflies and boys being excluded from them, I mean does it really matter? Maybe it doesn't matter, but why stifle a boys admiration of a butterfly?
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  2. R-Tistic

    R-Tistic Your favorite DJ

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    I donno.....all I know is that if I was five, and my classmate had on a butterfly shirt, I'd have jokes for him all day until he ran and cried.
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  3. UnbrokeN

    UnbrokeN Well-Known Member

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    gender roles arent socialyl inherited..its genetical

    i had diffrent intrests as a kid than the girls...and not because society pressured me to like these things..
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  4. yea, kids can be cruel. I wouldn't want my son to endure that, but neither would I want him to feel he couldn't like what he liked, say admire the beauty of a butterfly. The butterfly is merely a symbol of what gender stereotyping can do at its most feeble. At the other end of the scale, you have emotional detatchment because of its association with the 'feminine emotion' this inturn can lead to repression and other behaviour that is stifled and one sided - one sided in the sense I feel it distorts our being.

    I don't think raising a child gender neutral is possible, but I do think we need to be aware of our prejudices when we are so quick to say, 'no thats not for you, thats for girls' We should weigh up the pros and cons and see whether a boy and a butterfly is really that dangerous, and moreover, what are we actually scared of?
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  5. This is the comfortable way to look at it, the problem is we as men and women arent all the same. Me and you wouldn't of had the same interests just cus we were boys/

    to say it is purely genetical is hard to believe because there have been many studies which have shown that gender is constructed and how there are cross cultural differences of gender socialisation. See margaret mead and the new guinea children and Simone de beauvoir's the second sex as a couple of examples.

    btw:I'm not denying genetics completely, im just saying that gender constructs have quite a lot of power in fashioning the individual
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  6. R-Tistic

    R-Tistic Your favorite DJ

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    ^^Yeah...I don't think it's all genetic, although that has a big thing to do with it. It is obvious that football is heavily driven by testosterone, as are many other things that men do, which is why they are interested in them...the same way that estrogen drives women/females to have interest in things that stimulate their emotions versus their adrenaline and desire for thrill that men have. It is really a combination of both, just as everything else. Nothing is purely driven 100% by environment, or by genetics. A black kid in Jacksonville Fl will most likely have an interest in football, to where a kid in Canada will have an interest in hockey, because that's what their environment exposes them to...but the fact that they are interested in hockey and football versus Barbies and Easy Bake ovens are still proof of their testosterone in action.
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  7. Hidden_Poetry

    Hidden_Poetry New Member

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    Being that it was a "wildlife" center they were at. I really thing it wouldn't make a difference if the boys got butterfly stickers or not. Heck it would only seem right they got butterfly stickers since it was a "widlife" place. If it were me I would have given ALL kids butterfly, ladybug, birds, flowers etc etc. I mean, it really shouldn't matter. More so at that age.

    It's not like dressing your boy in an all pink outfit. That would be wrong, but stickers being gender base? Give me a break. Geesh.
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  8. skandelous_lala

    skandelous_lala back from the dead

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    Duh.

    Gender roles are started the day we dress girls in pink and boys in blue. Buy our sons Tonka trucks and our daughters Barbies.
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  9. UnbrokeN

    UnbrokeN Well-Known Member

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    but boys do not like barbies..and most girls do.

    gender roles are socially constructed to a certain degree because thats the way things work..but fundamentally, boys and girls act and behave diffrently
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  10. whats the 'duh' for?

    I wasn't making this thread like I had some kind of epiphany about gender roles but rather to get a conversation going about the implications of them.
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  11. Hidden_Poetry

    Hidden_Poetry New Member

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    You make this gender role post at least once a month. How much more conversation do you want about it?! ;o)
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  12. wel excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuze me

    didnt mean to bore you
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  13. Hidden_Poetry

    Hidden_Poetry New Member

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    Bore me? Who said anything about boring me. Never that. Duh, you should know that lol.

    I'm just saying, since you said you wanted conversation about it so you made this thread----Samii made a good point about the blue/pink etc. Pretty much puts an end to the early aged gender roles, doesn't it? lol

    Wonder why we do that? Would it be right for us to give our sons at an early age barbie dolls? or perhaps dress them in pink? Do you think if we did it like that, we'd make them gay? Something to think about, all goes back to the "it's a choice, not born". So much to converse about ;o)
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  14. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    Brit, why not let the boy wear a dress? What's wrong with that?

    Why do we have opposite sex bathrooms, especially in this age of gender neutrality?
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  15. why is it more severe for a man to wear a dress as oppose to a woman dressing like a man?

    I don't know.
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  16. Akustikz

    Akustikz .

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    butterflies? i barely get butterflies in my stomach, man up
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  17. yea, this is what can happen if something as simple as telling a boy to be dubious of the beauty of a butterfly is embraced. It is negatively taken into ones idea of self, (in this case the young boy)and how they project it and themselves onto the world.

    I have also noticed in my time that 'manning up' often means the opposite
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  18. Hidden_Poetry

    Hidden_Poetry New Member

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    Imagine not having gender washrooms. I'd be peekin.
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  19. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    Who says that?
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  20. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    They already have that in NYC... transsexual rights or something... anybody can claim victim.
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