[VOTE][Week 1] Rico vs nO gOoD!

Discussion in 'The Rapmusic Storytelling/Topical League' started by Tacky Jones, Aug 22, 2010.

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  1. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones www.TaCsmassivecock.gov

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    [​IMG]

    VERSES

    VERSUS DUE: Every Friday @ 11:59 PM PST
    LINE LIMIT: Minimum of 16 lines, Maximum of 64
    ** NO RECYCLING, NO EXCEPTIONS **
    •Recycling is the equivalent to that of a no-show and will be treated as such, thus resulting in a loss in favor of the participant whom chose to recycle and a win in favor of his/her opponent
    •Extensions may only be granted if a moderator has given consent prior to a verse being posted in the match OR your opponent gives his consent
    •If granted, the extension will override deadline for both participants extending it for no more than 24 hours
    •CHECK-INS are encouraged, but not required
    •Verses MUST incorporate AT LEAST 1 of the provided topics or pictures
    •A failure to show will result in a loss and a sign out by default
    •If your opponent fails to show, you MUST STILL post AT LEAST 5 lines (4-15) AND 3 voting links in order to claim victory
    •A Championship Title WILL NOT be decided by way of no-show!!!
    •If an opponent fails to show in a Championship match, the remaining participant will be ranked as the number 1 seed, but will not be considered a Champion until a win by vote
    •Upon your second no show, you will be suspended for two weeks of competition. A third no show will result in a three week suspension and a fourth will result in a suspension for the remainder of the season. There is no suspension for first time no showers.
    • Competitors are limited to posting 3 times in their own match, which allows for checking in, posting votes, and posting a verse. For each post over 3 unless deemed necessary by the mods, the competitor will be docked one vote.
    • Each competitor may only post once in another competitors battle allowing for a vote and nothing more, if you would like an explanation or to explain as to why a vote was cast a certain way, you can pm them or point things out properly in the vote to begin with. Violating this will result in losing a vote in your match.
    • A verse can be edited if and only if it is the first verse to be posted and the other verse has yet to be posted or it is the second verse posted and a vote has yet to be received.
    • Members found constantly disruptive to the league will have their sign-in ignored.


    VOTING


    VOTES DUE: Every Sunday @ 11:59 PM PST

    •You MUST vote on AT LEAST 5 matches AND post links in your thread
    •EACH link NOT POSTED will result in a 1 vote DEDUCTION
    •Voting on the Championship and Contender matches is mandatory
    •Champ and Contender links MUST be labeled accordingly
    •Your votes MUST be AT LEAST 2 FULL lines in length per verse in order to be deemed valid (Discretion given on incomplete verses)
    •Failure to vote and/or post LABELED LINKS will result in vote deductions in your battle
    •If your opponent fails to show, you are still accountable for voting on 3 matches as well as posting those links in your match and labeling the CHAMP and CONTENDER respectively!!!
    •Votes posted AFTER DEADLINE will NOT COUNT!!!
    •Voting is open to PARTICIPANTS, RSTL MODERATORS, and PAST CHAMPIONS ONLY!!!
    •PAST CHAMPIONS MUST vote on a MINIMUM of 3 matches in order to be counted as a legitimate voter
    •Editing your vote for any reason must be done within the hour of the original post time. Otherwise, the vote will be null and void.

    ----------------------------------------------------------------

    Any changes must be agreed upon by both participants and cleared by a moderator

    MODERATORS ARE LAW OF THE LAND
    AIM NAMES
    NASTY- LyRiKaLxLoRd
    T.a.C- thedude8125
    ShadowWarriorfs- ShadowWarriorfs
    test
  2. nO gOoD!

    nO gOoD! Life Music :: Press Play

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2001
    Messages:
    14,243
    check...



    don't duck.

    edit. RICO is it cool with you if we extend this for 24 hour longer. its sometimes hard for me to commit x amount of time to do this.. I'll be here though for sure.

    2nd edit, I'm writing right now, and I have no idea as to what time we are following, bear with me. I have no intention of this battle getting no showed. I'll post. be easy
    test
  3. RICO

    RICO my daughter right there

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2002
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    6,773
    nogood, i dont belive ive ever had the real pleasure of meeting you....always seen you around tho.


    im here dough
    test
  4. RICO

    RICO my daughter right there

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2002
    Messages:
    6,773
    every day before work, i would creep to her bed,
    re-tuck her in tight, and lay a kiss on her head..
    my baby girl is my world, she's the worlds greatest gift,
    just for god giving her life, im greatfull for this,
    when I come home, and see here smile with glee,
    It makes me smile as well cause she was smiling for me,
    we were like 2 peas in a pod, stuck together like glue,
    i'll never forget the way she'd light up a room
    and my girl was the sweetest thing ive ever seen,
    a lil pep in her step but still as sweet as can be,
    her swagger was outrageous a soon to be queen
    respectful and sincere what else could she be


    she moved so swift, kinda like a Hawaiian dancer,
    until she didn’t move too much after being diagnosed with cancer,


    God, why you pick on the lil people why you punishing me?
    Like im the target, and you gunnin for me,
    She was my every thing, my dreams and my love….
    My lil girl was the sole reason that every day I woke up,
    .......
    "sweetie, don’t worry, you just gotta be strong,
    don’t give up my lil soldier, you just keep going on,
    i tried my best just to keep you from harm,
    now hurt so bad, that life is from the IV's in your arm,
    “Daddy my whole body hurts, am I gonna be okay,
    “ya honey bunches……your gonna go home today”

    but days turned to months….and the lil girl never got cured,
    and she never gave up, because her soul was pure….
    Daddy, would visit his girl, not wanting to let go,
    but after many nights of prayer daddy knew he had to let go.....



    “ im here to see…..” "I know sir, she’s the third door to the right”,
    ……”hey pretty girl…hows my mama doing tonight”
    well......
    .......“shh….if it hurts just rest your eyes”….
    …..i know your gonna get rest tonight….”
    Gosh baby, your still so pretty, you’re my queen for ever,
    And no matter what happens, your gonna be with me for ever,
    Always remember that daddy loves you more than life it self
    And ive looked for answers, and asked god for help,
    You look so peacefull laying in bed…
    One last time……….i’ll re-tuck you in and give you a lil kiss on your head..........

    *pulls the plug*
    test
  5. nO gOoD!

    nO gOoD! Life Music :: Press Play

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2001
    Messages:
    14,243
    WARNING SIGNS..

    it all started at 6 am, the door's locked,
    it was a clean house. mom kept the floors mopped.

    but I'm more shocked, that I'm only six,
    In the midst of theft, drugs, and lowly tricks.

    mom cursin, sayin things she says to vent,
    got fired stealin from the till.. to pay the rent.

    gettin some help should have been.. the first step,
    but shit I'm only six, I haven't seen the worst yet,

    so if this bit spooked ya, from the cartoons.
    this next bit I spit is how I got the dark wounds


    [​IMG]

    from birth the curse that lurks beneath the surface..
    is let loose.. when you work for the serpent.

    it's like I've seen death in disquse as a child
    and every year with the next, I get wild and wild

    problems pile and pile, with every mile and mile
    walked in these shoes, ev-er-y breath and step

    no dad, no mom, man I've wept and wept
    no food, so bored so I slept and slept

    man its crazy, mom too lazy to raise me..
    like she hated me, coulda paid her to trade me

    in for something different cause I looked like dad,
    I thought he hated me too, I was shook right bad.

    I'm not bad, so don't call this man a molester
    I'm just the son of a man they call hannibal lecter..



    -------------------------------------


    I didn't have time to sit and write this week , so I ended up rushing this in the last 30 minutes to at least give you some critiques on your verse. well done dude.
    test
  6. Shadow

    Shadow Kotaro's Master

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2004
    Messages:
    60,692
    Rico - The story in this was nicely done and developed pretty nicely. I enjoyed this family type of story and thought it flowed really well. I thought some of the wording could have been better but i still think it was pretty solid for the topic you choose. Good work


    Fave Line -
    "i tried my best just to keep you from harm,
    now hurt so bad, that life is from the IV's in your arm,
    “Daddy my whole body hurts, am I gonna be okay,
    “ya honey bunches……your gonna go home today”"


    NG - This was a cool story but wasn't as developed as much as i thought it should have been. It had a lot of potential and i think that with time, you could have made it better. I did enjoy the rhyming and the flow was solid. I really do enjoy your work but i think that the fact that you were strapped for time hurt this piece. Still a nice piece of work.


    Fave Line -
    "from birth the curse that lurks beneath the surface..
    is let loose.. when you work for the serpent.

    it's like I've seen death in disquse as a child
    and every year with the next, I get wild and wild"

    Overall a even matchup i thought. The rhyming and flow by both were solid and the stories were solid. I thought NG had a better potential for a story but Rico developed it better. So he gets my vote. Nicely done guys


    Vote Rico
    test
  7. Calibre

    Calibre Peoples Champ

    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2003
    Messages:
    5,907
    v - Rico

    Rico - I really felt this piece, from start to finish the imagery you drew
    was fantastic. The idea was well thought up - rhymes and flows
    were cool also. Amazing Stuff.

    No Good - I been reading you for time, your a sick writer. Was really getting into your story, wanted to see more but understand the difficulties of writing to your full potential without time on your side.
    Your lines before the picture seemed really good in terms of flow and smoothness, however it seemed to fade off a slight bit after. Still a good job for 30 minutes.

    Nice battle guys.


    v/Rico
    test
  8. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones www.TaCsmassivecock.gov

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2008
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    76,208
    rico - this shit was depressingly sad. almost brought a tear to my eye lol. but very well written. the story developed nicely. nice lil twist having the patient be the daughter. i thought for sure it was a wife/girlfriend. kept my interest the whole way through very well. i think you could step up your rhyming a lil. but other than that, very well written peice.

    ng- for the time you said you put in, very nice. like the other two voters have said, this story had nice potential. it'd be cool to see you write out what you had planned to and post it in the open mic. anyway though, mechanically this was sick. had the flow and nice rhyme schemes to it.

    vote- rico. had the more developed story. both writers came with some dope shit though. looking forward to seeing more from you two.
    test
  9. Cigma

    Cigma Maxwell's Demon

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2002
    Messages:
    12,377
    This was tough.

    Rico's story was emotional, kinda layed it on really thick. I wanted to feel the dads love for his girls, see the history the dad had with his girl besides just being told.

    my baby girl is my world, she's the worlds greatest gift,
    just for god giving her life, im greatfull for this,

    This is lackluster to me.

    but then you came with lines like;

    she moved so swift, kinda like a Hawaiian dancer,
    until she didn’t move too much after being diagnosed with cancer,

    Bam! that's clever, great imagery, and then sobering.

    NG - great potential ending, but not nearly enough to get there.

    it's like I've seen death in disquse as a child
    and every year with the next, I get wild and wild

    that ties in so well with the Warning signs theme and the ending of Hannibal Lecter son.



    Vote Rico
    test
  10. Scrolls-Oracle of Omen

    Scrolls-Oracle of Omen *DBS*--*A.B.C*

    Joined:
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    Rico- Damn dude...tryin to read a verse...fucker almost made a dude cry lol. Damn where to start. Story was well thought up...clever..inspirational..sad..flow was great. Alotttt of emotion. Couldn't of asked for nething better. Well done bro...

    Ps...this story gave me the tingles. Lol

    No good....no bad for a rushed verse. Shoulda gave urself more time. Lol. Good shit though..flow was good. Story was ok. Next week take Ur time.

    Vote...Rico
    test
  11. Shadow

    Shadow Kotaro's Master

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    Rico up 5-0
    test
  12. RICO

    RICO my daughter right there

    Joined:
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    6,773
    voted on all open battles and critiqued on the no show verse..
    test
  13. Shadow

    Shadow Kotaro's Master

    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Rico wins 5-0
    test
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