Undercover Christian (Based on a true Story)

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by UFO the Phoenix, Apr 24, 2005.

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  1. UFO the Phoenix

    UFO the Phoenix I DONT BELIEVE IN ALIENS!

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    Undercover Christian

    I just entered mother natures left breast
    Ushered by a hobgoblin in a flower dress
    The milk here is spoiled filled with putrid imps
    They recite hymns like chants
    Calling for the gathering of unknown spirits
    My stomach is upset
    As the repeated verse reaches climax
    My chest holds my heart under arrest
    And the previous anointed oil
    On my forehead is burning my flesh
    Excuse me
    This is my first Unitarian Universalist visit
    I timidly explain to the animated women
    Sitting next to me
    Perplexed by my peace while others sing
    She gives me a cheerful smile
    Void of love
    The corner of her eyes judging me
    Reflecting her lies, I suppose
    Because the small talk
    Transformed into corroded dust
    Maybe it was my aura blush
    That made others in the room stare at me smug
    Their leader stumbled on words
    The strange Egyptian girl in front
    Gave me a blank look
    Wearing her Disney sweater
    She resembled a fairy tale princess
    Perhaps a demon Goldie-locks
    (I glance back she’s gone)
    The kids look like miserable robots
    With painted frowns herded around
    Like joyless cattle in the wrong flock
    The parents look even more lost
    Shuffling in seats like nervous beast
    I’m witnessing some invisible holocaust
    Fifty people or so stuffed in an onion box
    Surrounded by vampires, witches, and warlocks
    I’m wishing I would of brought my garlic salt…
    On the wall there’s no holy cross
    Only an abstract collage of colors gone wrong
    Posters of babble supporting disorder chaos
    This hollow temple teardrop seemed false
    On the outside this small pancake building
    Looks like a compressed lighthouse
    They take offerings for the community
    I pass the basket with polite doubts

    April rain on a Sunday morning
    I feel God crying for them all
    They mean well, holding
    Their sacred hymns over stubborn hearts
    Where the bible is only a mythical storybook
    And Jesus is compared to Abraham Lincoln
    Or some other great leader over looked
    They pray with open eyes
    Clap their hands like worried crooks
    Such a disturbing fellowship
    Becoming anxious again for the end
    My soul is shook

    As some lady looking like something
    Out of a Harry Potter movie closes the service
    Her fake laugh matched her tedious speech
    Monotonous worship - unfilled but deep
    Where the lights randomly switch on and off
    Man made special effects help them believe
    The rituals of this cult far fetch bizarre
    As a dozen guests testify to a empty God
    Dropping stones in a vortex jar
    Confessions, laughter, happiness minus love
    The final benediction is a quote from Bob Dylan
    May you all stay “Forever young”
    As they put out the candle next to the podium
    I speed walk tackling the exit in bewilderment
    By Jews who confess the remembrance of their people set free
    PASS OVER the fact, sightless to this new slavery………………………….

    ……………….Oh my…

    …………..What…………just………..happened………..in there?

    *Rains harder on my drive back home*

    *2 hours later the sun comes out and I finish this poem*


    Oddie Sloan - 04/24/05 “10:30am Sunday pagan service experience”




    A poem about a odd terrify experience I had at this Palomar Unitarian Universalist Fellowship meeting, I was invited because they shared poetry today, celebrating the April as the national poetry month, only I didn’t know what I was getting myself into, and this was the closest I ever been to a Satan Cult, it scared me to death, but I was protected by anointed oil and praying for wisdom and insight from God before hand. Now I’m a Christian and I don’t really believe in organized religion but there is something just wrong with praying to spirits and calling on God’s that have no foundation…. these people welcome all Gods, Religion and teach that Jesus was only human. Their model is your God is my God and my God is your God its ok who you pray to, nature loves us all…they don’t worship the father, son, or holy spirit…. but Unitary in ONE…Sorry if I offended anyone with this poem but I spoke it from the heart overwhelmed by what I just saw.
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  2. UFO the Phoenix

    UFO the Phoenix I DONT BELIEVE IN ALIENS!

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  3. Poetickz

    Poetickz The Humble One

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    ufo....absolute craziness...i loved how u started ur piece off...

    your imagery throughout the entire piece is very very vivid...very descriptive...very strong...the way u described the "empty" stares...and the movements and reactions from the parents and children...very haunting indeed.

    all i can say man...this did come out very disturbing...not in an offensive way...but i was feelin what you were feelin...damn good job of expressing yourself...sometimes the only thing you can do is vent it out in hopes that the fear will release with it.
    one
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  4. rhino42

    rhino42 Ich liebe der Tisch!!

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  5. skandelous_lala

    skandelous_lala back from the dead

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    Your imagery was very well... it was very easy to visulize it as you were describing what you witnessed.

    I am not going to comment too much on your feelings about your experiences. I've encountered churches before that I thought there was something off so I know what you're talking about with this piece. It was an interesting read.
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  6. Pent uP

    Pent uP I'd Like to Fight Ten Men

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    DAMN! Just when i thought i was good, u showed me a poem that shoved me back into the cover i've been struggling to jump out of!

    I'm not fond of religion, im also not fond of storytelling in poems, but i must say when something is good, i can't deny it its props, and this was by far the best read in awhile for me

    First of all each line transitioned smoothly into the next one, causing the read to be that much easier; I loved how you used your words in this piece it really brought it to life, I could picture myself in an acid-trip-like drawn cartoon where a guy thinks hes going to church and ends up with a gothic like cult. The emotion of fear and hate (for lack of a better word, im sleep deprived fuck you), if not resentment;

    Normally i'd be able to say the opening stanza was the best, lalalala

    but honestly each stanza here was just to hot; my favorite were the first two; the april rains line was just DAMN, all of it was crazy, but i guess somethings gotta stand out more than everything else

    overall i thank you much for asking me to read this joint and any time u want someone to critique ur shit, hit me up

    goddamn
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  7. Philly_215

    Philly_215 The Silent Poet

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    At first it seems a little off to me ( well from what i'm use to reading from you ) your words from the gate wrap around and drag me in but this time you where leading me and then:

    The kids look like miserable robots
    With painted frowns herded around
    Like joyless cattle in the wrong flock
    The parents look even more lost
    Shuffling in seats like nervous beast
    I’m witnessing some invisible holocaust
    Fifty people or so stuffed in an onion box
    Surrounded by vampires, witches, and warlocks
    I’m wishing I would of brought my garlic salt…
    On the wall there’s no holy cross
    Only an abstract collage of colors gone wrong
    Posters of babble supporting disorder chaos
    This hollow temple teardrop seemed false
    On the outside this small pancake building
    Looks like a compressed lighthouse
    They take offerings for the community
    I pass the basket with polite doubts

    that happened and i was trapped man it was like a lyrical rolling stone from then on i was just rolling with you. your word play was real fam. i could relate to this cause i remember when i was like 15 in church and i looked around and saw these same people out on the corners or drinking and fighting in the streets, creeping around on there husband or wife beating the living hell out of there children

    at that point i saw that religion wasn't about church but more about self and how you conduct your self rather then speak on it

    stay up fam
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  8. lpoet

    lpoet POET

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    i think this was outstanding..i absolutly love the perspective your coming from...i cant help but wonder what they were worshiping...i often tune into this athiest online new chanel and listen to their nonsense and wonder how one could be so lost..the only thing in my opinon in worshiping a fake god is not worshiping one at all..to think that there is nothing more grand than yourself in such a vast universe is just ignorent to me..but anyway

    the poem really drew me in..i pictured myself here and really felt the intensity of the poem...i cant say i've ever experienced anything like this in my life but i can only imagine the shock in which youp stood there..i would have felt ashamed and dirty amongst those people.....

    you have to pray for people like that b/c someone has them undercontrol.....its a sad world we live in...

    She gives me a cheerful smile
    Void of love
    ...

    excellent lines..i think that says so much..its sort of the underling thing in the poem.....sort of like robots....the smile was just an action it had not feeling just action

    ....damn man...i wish i wasnt at work or i'd write some good shit...

    thank you for the pm and thank you for the piece

    impressive....
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  9. Madnick

    Madnick Modern Laureate

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    Damn UFO...
    What I read was great. Everything with you seems to be a true story I want to stay at your house for one day to see how much of this shit actually goes on. But this was a good piece and I enjoyed it and I will check out the rest later.
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  10. Clarksvegas_Dan

    Clarksvegas_Dan Registered Voter

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    Okay Oddie, as much as I respect your opinion, this poem disturbs me, not because I believe it to be a "Satan Cult," but because that is what you thought it was. The individuals in that church teach tolerance and open-mindedness. Did they mention any of the biblical names of Satan at all? Satan-the persian name, Beelzebub-hebrew, Lucifer-latin....I doubt very seriously that they did. You should try reading a book called "The Origin of Satan," by Elaine Pagels. Also, quote me one line of scripture where Jesus himself mentions Satan. Do me another favor, go through the New Testament and count the number of times it mentions hell, then do the same for the Old Testament.
    You believe, if I may, that there is an eternal struggle between good and Evil. This is known as a dualism. The taoist religion is also dualist, but it doesn't use as harsh of terms as Evil. Good and Bad, perhaps. In Hinduism, they call the two forces Dharma, or duty/destiny, and Adharma, or that which diverts one's destiny or duty. In other words, the Hindu's do not fear evil in another. Nor did Christ. Do live a live of Dharma is to do the next right thing. To live a life of Adharma, is to subordinate God's will to your own. The path of Adharma is one of Selfish behavior. That is all that evil is.
    In any case, the Universalists do not really have a specific doctrine of their own. They merely open their doors so that individuals from any faith may come to worship side by side. You may go there to worship God as you understand him, and an Egyptian girl may go there to worship Allah as she understands him, or a Hindi may go there to Worship Vishnu, A wiccan may go there to worship the Earth. Your fear of the unknown hints at certain insecurities that you have yet to resolve. You have no need to fear the Universalists, their only goal is to promote peace among the differing religions. Believe it or not, they probably now more about the Christian scriptures than you do.
    "May those be angry with you who do not know with how much effort the truth is sought" ---St. Augustine of Hippo. 3rd cent. AD
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  11. Halloween Jack

    Halloween Jack Heavens Demon

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    yo this is ridiculous spaceman! you've got ill use of wordplay, its almost like im seeing what you saw man. maybe because i've had similar experiances, the crazy thing is that there are places like that everywhere, just unseen by the untrained eye. in my area there is an actual satanic church, the church of the original sin, that teaches crazy shit like this. and there's a cult that i kinda pissed off a while back and all types of disturbing things started happening to me and i wasn't as knowledgable in the scriptures and protected as you were so it was bad. glad nothing like that happened to you dog, things like that really exist and its unnerving to think about. you definitely stirred up some shishkabob with this one bro. keep it up. heal the world. 1.

    ps. have you heard about the new popes past dog?!?!?!?! its uncanny how this plays into the endtimes prophecy.
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  12. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

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    "The corner of her eyes judging me"

    ^That was a sick line there.

    This was an incredible piece. The flow was on point and the imagery you dispalyed made it seem like I was watching a movie of this. This was some disturbing shit also, I would have left that place before service was over from the way you was talking. But people have their beliefs you just got to let them be. I would go on but going back and forth over subjects like this, isnt just me.

    Great piece man

    ONe luv
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  13. RealMS

    RealMS Ne te quaesiveris extra

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    I did print this out last night btw lol (kinda starting a collection here. nah, jp) and first I read what you wrote after the poem and was thinking [help]

    not to sound hypocritical but I know it will, I don't mean judgmental or anything of that sort...BUT, from what you wrote of that experience I would have been scared too! Shoot when I first got saved I was scared {makes sense doesn't it? (Of course not!)} but from the descriptions of the women and just the word 'chant' it makes me think of The Crucible. Reading that play alone gave me an eerie feeling itself. The church I used to go to looks almost identical to the picture you posted, but that's completely off topic.

    In your poem you did say however they mean well; not everyone holds the same belief as you and I may. I know you're aware of that. A lot of talk about that in relation-but this war has been going on for how long now?
    I enjoyed reading this-keep up

    -Much Love
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  14. AlmostFamous

    AlmostFamous U got a problem?

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    lines that stood out to me... the most

    My chest holds my heart under arrest

    The strange Egyptian girl in front
    Gave me a blank look
    Wearing her Disney sweater
    She resembled a fairy tale princess
    Perhaps a demon Goldie-locks

    The final benediction is a quote from Bob Dylan
    May you all stay “Forever young”
    As they put out the candle next to the podium
    I speed walk tackling the exit in bewilderment
    By Jews who confess the remembrance of their people set free
    PASS OVER the fact, sightless to this new slavery………………………….



    damn man... i dont really know what to say for this one.,... wowzers


    first off Undercover Christain is that apply to the cult or you.... im thinking the cult.. lol

    there was a demon-like goldie locks there as welll.. oh shit.. you better lock yourself in your basement for the next month!! lol

    this was a very well read poem oddie

    thanks for sharing man...

    rep up
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  15. AlmostFamous

    AlmostFamous U got a problem?

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    hahah... acid trip like drawn cartoon feeling came over me too!! lol
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  16. UFO the Phoenix

    UFO the Phoenix I DONT BELIEVE IN ALIENS!

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    ^I just wrote what I saw....and used poetic word-play to describe the adnormal feeling

    Luther I didnt mean to offend you...but that Church gave me nightmares...and I couldnt sleep right....actually I havent been the same sense....spiritually shaken up

    the point of the matter is that people were all chanting and going with this maddness....all religions doesnt mean a good thing?....last days...end times mentions that there will be a one world religion concept...and if its anything like I experience the other day woe be to this world....its darker then I thought



    thanks everyone for the in depth heart felt feedback...I take it all serious...good and bad...

    madnick I write what I see...so almost all my poems are based on REAL experiences that have happen to me....I think that is what makes my best pieces....you can tell the difference

    Almostfamous...I was the CHRISTIAN UNDERCOVER...because I went in their dressed all in black and ghetto looking people thought I was a lost soul so they first wanted me to join their church once somebody touched my shoulder that was the end of that...and nobody talked to me anymore...I felt like I was the only sane person in the room and everyone else was under mind control or hypnotize....it was very errie....hard to explain....but yeah I was the one undercover....nobody knows what God has done for me....I'm on a higher spiritual level then others....and I still dont know everything...never will...but at first glance I might appear to be just a average black guy....if they only knew




    PLEASE ANY SAINTS....TRUE CHRISTIANS OR GOD BELIEVE BORN AGAIN JESUS LOVERS

    PRAY FOR ME.....I HAD NIGHTMARES LAST NIGHT AND I HAVENT BEEN THE SAME SINCE I WENT TO THAT UUbabylon-CHURCH

    I DONT KNOW WHAT DEMON IS NOW ON MY CASE BUT PLEASE IF YOU HAVE FAITH I COULD USE THE EXTRA PRAYERS


    THIS IS FOR REAL
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  17. Clarksvegas_Dan

    Clarksvegas_Dan Registered Voter

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    I don't believe in 'End Times' prophecy. The book of revelations was an eloquently written description of a scary dream that John had while in prison. It does have meaning, but it was only intended for him, just as your dreams are intended for you. All religions? Well, I gotta tell ya, I have little respect for the true Church of Satan. They wouldn't be welcome in my church.lol I also have little respect for the Church of Scientology, though I greatly appreciate the discoveries of science and I feel like there's a lot of good stuff coming from the Church of Christian Science. Besides that I really like most religions. There are core principles in the world's religions that teach essentially the same thing. The Christian religion has strayed so far from the actual message of Christ, that I believe that fundamentalist Christians will become the next terrorist threat. Indeed, they are already shooting up abortion clinics and brutalizing homosexuals. How far from the real is that? The teachings and actions of fundamentalist Christians actually negate the teachings of Jesus' sermon on the mount, which by the way is the core of Jesus actual message, at least withing the canonized gospels. Did you know that in Jesus' own time Mary Magdalene actually became the first Christian Priestess. Christianity has been distorted over time more than any other religion, because politics and power were always involved.
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  18. Clarksvegas_Dan

    Clarksvegas_Dan Registered Voter

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    In fact, from a historical perspective, what is commonly called Christianity today is actually various mutations of Christianity. The Christianity inspired by Jesus was more of a religious philosophy, inspired by philosophy and the various mystery religions, but deriving authority from Judaism. The Jewish faith actually does not believe in Hell or Satan, the Idea of an Evil counterpart to God comes from the dualist religion of Zoroastrianism, which began a few hundred years before Jesus' time, and borrowed heavily on the Cult of Mithras the Sun God. It became known to many of the apostles and their respective disciples as the Demiurge, which was a seperate God who controlled the illusion of the material world and enslaved mankind in the physical being. Again this just a dualist belief. Jesus did not teach us to eradicate evil. Hitler taught that. Jesus taught us to love our neighbors as ourselves and to pray for our enemies. Jesus did not teach us to point out the sins of others. He taught us to remove the plank from our own eye, before pointing out the splinter in another's. The core of Jesus' message was that we must change ourselves, not others. We must look within. We must be honest with ourselves before we can ever be honest with another.
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  19. UFO the Phoenix

    UFO the Phoenix I DONT BELIEVE IN ALIENS!

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    ^you getting to deep with it...I dont think its gotta be that complicated

    LOVE GOD

    I believe in JESUS CHRIST....I know many christian churchs arent perfect I've been to alot of corrupt christian churchs....no doubt some are messed up...those that dont have the foundation of Christ

    I'm not judging those people....I feel sorry for them....similar to what lpoet was saying...never did I point them out and call them sinners?....I felt under attack spiritually....you might not understand how deep that was

    that cult church thing I went to the other day was ANTI CHRIST...they didnt say "we worship satan...blah blah"...that would be ludicous...they simply were the oppisite of Jesus

    And the book of revelation is the real thing....woe be to the world...events are already taking place....things are being set in motion....are you blind?....most of scripture has ALREADY been fulfilled....its a fact....go do your homework

    I call it how I see it

    but yo I'm done with this issue....I had deep prayer with others about this and burned that progam paper that I brought home with me....and my nightmares are gone now

    problem solve

    I'm done with this...I dont wanna talk about it anymore

    thank you
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  20. AlmostFamous

    AlmostFamous U got a problem?

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    I'll put in a prayer for you oddie
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