UGH...sensitive ass boyfriends...(for the ladies)

Discussion in 'Ladies Lounge' started by samii so sexii, Jun 27, 2005.

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  1. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    ladies, have you ever been in a situation where you had a boyfriend, or SO that took the things that you say in jest waaay out of context, or blew it out of proportion??

    For example [my bf is prolly gonna get all up in my ass bout this once he reads it, but w/e]: you have a boyfriend, and you're both talkin, and joking around, and you call him a 'sissy'. He then orders that you take it back or he has nothing else to say to you for the rest of the night. you're sort of surprised at his reaction, and it strikes you as incredibly petty that he would even take it there. you ask if he's serious, and he says yes, because that calling him a sissy is rude, disrespectful, and it's an 'unwritten rule' that you don't call men sissies. wth?? now, he does stuff like this all the time, and you don't feel you should have to appologize everytime his ego is damaged by a joke especially when he was joking too. Let's take it further, a few weeks earlier, he calls you a 'punk bitch'. You know he was joking, so you come back with a retort. You don't take it up the ass, or demand that he kiss your ass to make you feel better. Speaking of taking shit up the ass...you can't even use that figure of speach toward him, because again, that's not something you say to a man.
    So, you refuse to take it back, and he actually gets off the phone and doesn't call you back...How hypocritical, he can call me a punk bitch [while joking of course] with no sort of recourse, but I call him a sissy, and he has nothing else to say to me.........are you serious?

    That type shit pisses me off so much. It's like a dichotomy of extreme masculinity, and sensitivity. And to me, he's actin like a weenie. but what do you think? Was I being rude? If I was, then I have no problem appologizing. But I feel like I'm ALWAYS appologizing for some joke that I shouldn't have said to him. Have you ever encountered a male that was so contradictive
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  2. skandelous_lala

    skandelous_lala back from the dead

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    Sounds like he has severe ego issues.

    I always wondered why some guys just could not take a joke. Especially when it's obvious that you're messing around.

    A part of me says that if he really hates that then to knock it off but that would mean he would need to knock it off on his end as well even if his joking around doesn't bother you. But then again I'm the way as you. I'll joke around and stuff like that and I hate it when people take it serious b/c it's like you would know if I was serious...... BITCH. lol
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  3. Putting a straight face on the tail end of a joke can kill the mood thats for sure.lol

    To me its an attention seeking thing. He wants you to see him as the man. Men's insecurities lie mainly in what we 'think' women think of us and how me match up to other men. However, what I have found is most times women do not 'weigh up' men how we sometimes think they do, but this misunderstanding leads men to be touchy at things such as 'sissy' etc. The ironic thing is women don't tend to be as petty about things like masculinity as men often appear to be about their own and other peoples perceptions of it. Its like how men are often concerned wherther they are big enough, but women do not tend to care about that. It's the man's obsession, and thats why a small joke can effect the ego of a guy in a big way. I think he is being touchy, but you need to understand that the heart of most mens insecurities are formed in roles of masculinity and the fear of not living up to this role, and women being present when it happens. Why not Let him know that you dont expect him to be 'the man' the whole time, reassure him, that you just want him to be himself, cus believe me, its not natural for a man to act masuline ALL the time, and its unreasonable for women to expect men to be that way. These expectations cause men to bottle up feelings, be emotionally unavailable with their partners and kids, all the things women say they don't want a man to be, yet they whether knowingly of unknowingly push them into these roles that they can't physically live upto. A man who is constantly masculine, has to pretend, and that is the heart of the problem, because then you have to lie to yourself and your partner, and everyone else in your life so you can live upto an image of what you believe a man should be. The solution I believe is to simply be yourself. Be with a woman who doesn't expect you to be anything but that, its much easier facing the world knowing you can be completely you, than going out with a mask on and trying not to put a foot wrong.

    Men always fear coming up against a man who is stronger than them. Being antagonized in the street infront of our girlfriends by a group of men etc. Thats probably one of the worst. Now, the worst thing a woman can do is expect their man to fight for them in the street, his ego will demand he does it, even if he is likely to be killed, he will fight. Thats the demand of being masculine at its most controlling and dangerous. Now a woman who is sensible will not let her man fight, she will pull him away, she will do whatever it takes to help avoid this confrontation, but some women, will expect him to fight, and want him to fight and be the man, but they dont realise what they are doing and what they perpetuate.
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  4. LikeWise3001

    LikeWise3001 I crush alot

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    maybe he blew it ouf of porportion but still...

    you shouldnt call your man a sissy... even in a joking manner BECAUSE... we all know SOMETIMES jokes are a SAFE way to say what you might really be feeling about somebody else....

    we're men, that's us.... we HAVE to be strong and masculine, thats how we are raised... so deal with it and respect it...


    if a guy called your dude a sissy he would probably fight him.... so if you call him a sissy, of course he is gonna get upset...


    he could have handled the situation better though and just told you to not call him a sissy even if you were joking around.
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  5. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    ^^ ok, i see your point...but do you not see the contradiction when he called me a punk bitch?? that was rude, was it not?? but he was joking, so i didn't take offense...how can he just losely throw that at me, but when i call him sumthin very minute in comparison to punk bitch, he takes it to the 20th degree??

    im just not cool with double standards...and if he wants respect from me, he has to give it at the same time. and I do respect him, and his manly-ness...this is just ONE incident I've given you...there's plenty more:

    for example the times when I was rooting for a team other than the Pistons and he got mad, and was really gonna hang up on me b/c the Pistons are his favorite team. He does shit like that all the time. And it's gotten to the point where I dun think I can joke with him sometimes. I dunno wheater he's gonna laugh or trip. And I'm a funny girl, I have a sense of humor, and I love to laugh...it's like, I swear he be PMS'in some days [ugh...he gets mad when I say that too]

    **update**
    he called me at 6 in the mornin to get me to appologize. *rolls eyes* i swear....
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  6. He sounds like the overly competitive kid at school who was so easy to wind up. always taking things that didnt matter to everyone else so unbelievably serious and because of it people played on it because its annoying and funny to see someone get all over wraught for such a petty reason.

    You are acting in a pretty normal way towards someone acting like that because when someone annoys you by being childish its makes you wanna be childish back. Tell him to chill out and take a joke. If he really says he gonna hang up on you cus you cheer for another team jokingly (and he is serious), then I dunno....lol thas on another level right there.....
    .
    .
    ....
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  7. urban_tactics

    urban_tactics aka johnny cockram

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    sounds like it aint gonna last..........communication problems?

    classic person that can dish it out but cant take it.......hmmm......yeah, usually when lil dumb shit like this starts botherin u, must mean your relationship is headed to hell

    better fix it quick...or its a wrap.....
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  8. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

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    A grown man can't take a woman callin him a sissy in a jokingly way? Mothafuckas don't even use the word sissy anymore. I probably would have joked on your ass for even using th word instead of getting mad and shit. Dude sounds insecure
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  9. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    exactly!! i use words that no one says anymore, or that are dorky just for kicks, like "fiddle sticks!", "Rats!", "Geez oh man", "great googamooga", "humungo" stupid stuff like that. and so, i call him a sissy, and he really gets mad like I just shot his dog or sumthin.

    on the Pistons thing...game 7, Horry was hittin 3's like woah...and i'm from cali, and he used to play for the lakers, so everytime Horry made one, i'd be like "woo". that was when he was like "Man i'm gonna leave, if you're gonna be doin that shit, i dun wanna hear that shit, you're gonna piss me off"...My cuzzin was rootin for the Spurs, and she's in the background [not even aware of our conversation] and she roots for the Spurs when they score, and he heard her [since she was plainly in the bg] and he was gonna hang up cuz of that too! he was like "if yur cuzzin gon be talkin shit, i dun wanna hear it" it's like, c'mon man...dang...i wasn't rooting for another team just to annoy him, and it wasn't like i was wearin a Suprs jersey...i dun even like the Spurs...I'm jst telling you this to illustrate how he blows things outta proportion alot. and this list could go on...

    I love my bf to death...but you're right, we always get sucked into these childish back and forth arguments, and they're usually over something that is blown outta proportion. Now, I'm not saying I'm perfect...and i'm not tryin to make him seem like he's a horrible guy...i guess im just venting cuz we argue so much. But cot damn...even tho i know after the other day, dun joke about callin him a sissy, i just wanna be like "stop actin like a sissy!!" lol

    but, i've just reached an epiphany....i'll be back soon....
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  10. x - calibur

    x - calibur Guest

    yeah sounds like he cant take a joke and is too sensitive

    if u want revenge bring him to rm, people on here will make him smash his comp
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  11. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    lol...he already posts on here...he was here b4 i was...and i doubt what ppl on here say will affect him that much lol...

    but again, im not tryin to paint him as a bad guy...there are two sides to every story
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  12. MCLEOD

    MCLEOD licenced provider

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    Muthafucker needs to grow up sounds like he is a sissy gettin upset over what team you go for that sounds like he tryin to control ya and shit
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  13. Fire Cracka

    Fire Cracka New Member

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    Your boyfriends a faggot pussy hahaha.
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  14. -[InfaMouz]-

    -[InfaMouz]- || M.Maestro ||

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    I would laugh if a niggga actually had the courage to say the word sissy.


    Not even at the fact that he called me one.. just at the fact that the word was in his mental dictionary.


    Wtf.. you look like calling another man a sissy? lol


    BUt still..if a chick dont like me callin her a bitch in a joking manner, dont call a niggga a sissy.

    Simple as that.
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  15. AllOrNothinEnt

    AllOrNothinEnt Retired from Rapmusic.com

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    He sounds like a bitch.
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  16. Jaye Mesa

    Jaye Mesa He Won't Stop

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    get over it, women arent the only people with emotions.
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  17. -[InfaMouz]-

    -[InfaMouz]- || M.Maestro ||

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    Let's use Chris Rock's Logic


    You get a sensitive man: " Why you so sensitive.. cant you take a fuckin' joke? I was just playing. I need me a hard rock.. you always gettin mad for lil shit.. I HATE THIS SHIT!!


    You get a insensitve man: " Why you never epress no feelings.. I don't feel any bond... Theres not communication, how you expect a relatiohship to last.. I cant get in your mind! I HATE THIS SHIT!!!!!


    ANd this applies to women finding the 'good' man as well.


    Just shut the fuck up and compromise..
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  18. Da New Kid

    Da New Kid New

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    I once smacked one of my ex's for callin' me a ''fag''... Y'all shoulda seen the look in the bitch's face before she started cryin'...
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  19. Xtr3m3lif3

    Xtr3m3lif3 Lost in Poetry

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    You just have to be careful what you say to a man. They are sensitive (most of them) and at least he let you know he was upset..some men won't say they are and you won't know and he'll hold it in. Your man seems to have a double standard. Its cool for him but not cool for you. But again you just have to suck it up because a relationship is all about compromise and just tell him how you feel and hopefully he'll stop and listen and you both can resolve it


    X
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  20. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    first of all, you must not have read, b/c I said that I appologized.

    second, that "shut the fuck up" shit don't fly wit me...so you can take that shit to a bitch that that gives a fuck about your existence.

    Lastly, for all you men up in my post, fuckin it up with your soapbox psychology, and rudeness, incase you hadn't noticed, the subject line says FOR THE LADIES...so you, and your penis, can just be the fuck out.

    you are dismissed.

    as for this thread....FREE POST...it no longer serves a purpose....

    p.s. good response @ Xtr3m3lif3
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