to the world from a cafe on u street

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by The Pharcyde, Aug 3, 2005.

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  1. The Pharcyde

    The Pharcyde Giovanni

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2000
    Messages:
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    inspired by Tim Seibles' “to the world from a restaurant”


    it’s almost empty inside Mocha Hut
    except for the folks on the couch
    and a pair of couples at a side table

    the crowd outside passes where
    i stood a week ago with Derrick
    & Fred, gawking at fleshy gourds
    squeezed into Hip-Huggers

    today, the lampposts sputter
    their glow across asphalt, i’m alone
    under low-lights as a man & woman
    leave Erico’s across the street

    clear skies this evening despite
    the storm cloud following me lately
    as i mope amongst love-sick addicts
    with their arms around one another

    the lady on the couch speaks
    softly in her man’s ear, my nerves
    kindle as i remember a lover’s
    whispers canvassing my earlobe

    or my tongue sucked into
    the whirlpool of a woman
    whose rye-colored
    skin glinted in any light

    i think of the week before
    with Derrick & Fred, checking
    the runway beauties, the three of us
    barely a pulse on their radar
    test
  2. twinkletoes

    twinkletoes New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 6, 2002
    Messages:
    118
    This is beautiful - it's what I try to get my students to do in everything they write --- See an ordinary experience in a new way...There's a simplicity about this piece that makes it something everyone can relate to, but a ³³³³³³³³³³ that makes it so highly readable. I love it.
    test
  3. RealMS

    RealMS Ne te quaesiveris extra

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2004
    Messages:
    5,023
    this may be the poem of the night for me that I've read so far, eloquent but so effortless seeming.

    or my tongue pulled into
    a kissing current by a woman
    whose rye-colored
    skin glinted in any light

    ^this line right here, is just quality to me. I agree with homegirl^ this was truly beautiful.
    Keep writing.

    -Much Love
    test
  4. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2001
    Messages:
    17,331
    ^I agree, it just seems like this came out of you so effortlessly. The imagery was on point. You could just see the whole story coming to life after each line. Everybody needs that someone in their live. It always seems like when you're not in a relationship, everybody around you is in one. Always good to see you around.

    One luv
    test
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