***MOVED...THIS IS THE RIGHT FORUM NOW, CORRECT?*** I'd appreciate anyone's input on this...i'm putting it here becuase this is the most applicable place on this site.....figured I'd see what you poets have to say about this.... It's an idea for a novel, a satire of christianity somewhat....anyway, here's the basic plot outline i've developed: Characters: Mary (teenage daughter), Gabe (8-10 year old younger brother of Mary), Parents (as yet unnamed), Jude (love interest of Mary) CHAPTER LAYOUT: 1) Introduction of characters. Gabe remembers the first time he became conscious of religions, when he told his parents his friend didn’t say the pledge of allegiance with them because his parents told him not to. 2) Gabe discovers Mary is talking to a boy (Jude) when he listens outside the closed door of her room 3) Gabe tells their parents at the dinner table that Mary was talking to a boy, at first she denies it, then admits it and begs their permission to go on a date with him. She specifies she wants to go somewhere safe, maybe to a church-sponsored youth event. They say his family doesn’t go to church, and she’s too young to date anyway. She gets angry, Gabe is confused. 4) Gabe goes to church with his family. Mary isn’t speaking to her parents, and he sits uncomfortably between them, thinking about what God would say to Mary. He concludes his parents are right and zones out 5) Gabe and Mary’s parents go into the city one afternoon to get a part for their truck, Mary tries to distract Gabe by letting him watch movies he isn’t supposed to and invites Jude over. Gabe hears sounds of distress from the room they are in and comes, then watches through the crack in the door as Jude rapes Mary. 6) Jude has left and Mary takes a bath. Gabe can hear her crying in the bathroom. The parents come home and Mary refuses to come out of her room so after yelling at her, they interrogate Gabe over dinner as to why. He doesn’t tell them, so they spank him and send him to bed. 7) A few weeks later things have calmed down a little bit. Mary has returned to dinners and is attempting to seem normal. Gabe doesn’t know what to do. At school one day he passes the health office and sees Mary inside, crying and talking to someone. He gets angry and attacks Jude, who doesn’t even know who he is. He is taken home from school, lectured, beaten, and sent to his room. 8) Mary hears about Gabe attacking Jude, and and appears shocked and offended in front of her parents but then seeks him out after dinner and pours her heart out to him, he doesn’t understand everything she is saying but he understands her tears and he promises not to tell her parents anything. 9) Some time has passed. Mary calls Gabe into the bathroom teary eyed one evening and hands him a home pregnancy test. He doesn’t know what it is and she won’t explain, eventually he tells her what it says. She starts to cry. 10) Mary tells her parents what happened. They explode and forbid her to have an abortion, saying she’s already damned enough for having sex out of wedlock. She tries to explain she was raped, but they don’t care. 11) Gabe recalls Mary’s experience that night as she told it to him much later: She rushed upstairs crying and locked her door. She tried to destroy her child with a coat hanger and hurt herself badly. The baby lived. 12) Mary won’t talk to her parents and they won’t talk to Gabe because he lied to them about knowing what happened. They sit together in church on Black Friday and listen to how Jesus died. Gabe looks at the cross and wishes he could die like Jesus and go to heaven. It becomes clear he believes he is going to hell. 13) Mary refuses to go to church one Sunday. There is a screaming match outside her door, and after she is forcibly dragged to church they all sit down with the pastor, who explains to her why she has to have the child and why she shouldn’t have been dishonest and invited Jude over. 14) Several months later, Mary gives birth to the child. Her parents name it John. Her birth went badly because of the injuries caused by her unsuccessful abortion and the injuries sustained from the rape. The doctors say that both she and the child are lucky to have survived, she should not have given birth under those conditions. 15) When she finally returns from the hospital, her parents give her the baby and tell her she has to marry Jude. They have a long argument. She curses at them and runs away into the night with the baby. Gabe runs after her but is unable to keep up and has to go home. 16) Gabe wakes up the next day to find his parents crying at breakfast. They tell him that police found the baby drowned in a pond a few miles from their house. There is no sign of Mary. Gabe goes to church with them and gets angry at God for allowing all of this to happen. 17) Modern day: relations between gabe and mary, neither talks to their parents, no one mentions John. thoughts?