" The Lucky "

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by fLaSh, Aug 23, 2004.

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  1. fLaSh

    fLaSh New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2000
    Messages:
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    Like to thank everyone thats read or giving me some pointer.
    I read alot of poems on here which gave me the idea of this poem..
    Enjoy


    If you believe in god
    then should know that there is no such thing as luck
    For all the times of plenty,
    And opportunities,
    That has been to you.
    Are blessings from god,
    And in this you should trust.
    So if you do not believe
    the paradox of our times will show you
    I'm just passing the buck!
    We have bigger houses and smaller families,
    More conveniences, but less time,
    We have more degrees, but less sense,
    More knowledge, But less judgment,
    More experts, but more problems
    We have multiplied our possessions,
    But reduced our values.
    We talk to much, love to seldom, and hate to often.
    We've learned how to make a living,
    But not a life;
    We've added years to life,
    not life to years
    We've cleaned up the air,
    but polluted the soul;
    We have higher incomes,
    but lower morals.
    So with all of this;
    It is time to bow before GOD and the atheist back his Luck.

    Thank You.
    test
  2. lpoet

    lpoet POET

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2002
    Messages:
    12,678
    welcome to the realm

    although i'm not really feeling the type of poem i can relate....sometimes u just wanna do something like this...

    We have multiplied our possessions,
    But reduced our values.

    ...very dope line..very true...

    keep dropin
    test
  3. TheDelusional1

    TheDelusional1 HOLYSHIT!

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2004
    Messages:
    39
    We've learned how to make a living,
    But not a life;
    We've added years to life,
    not life to years

    Those lines are excellent, you had a couple others that are most def. quotables.
    This is a different kind of poem structure, like a spoken word story or something ... but you did it good. Nice words.

    TD1
    test
  4. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    17,331
    You got three poems on the first page. You can only have 2. I closed one of your other ones.
    test
  5. RealMS

    RealMS Ne te quaesiveris extra

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2004
    Messages:
    5,023
    We've cleaned up the air,
    but polluted the soul;


    so many things put into this poem, could create millions of more. I don't have much else to say, except good things when I come to read poetry here, or anywhere for that matter. Continue to keep doin what you are. -Much Love
    test
  6. fLaSh

    fLaSh New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2000
    Messages:
    3,513
    OoOops... well i didn't know yawl had a 3 poem rule on the first page...


    Thank you everyone.... for reading an ur comments...
    I never really knew the differents between spoken word and poem..
    I thought they were pretty much the same thing...
    thanks you again
    test
  7. Natty LoCs

    Natty LoCs RIP "Pud"

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2004
    Messages:
    101
    this was nice it had alot of nice lines in it......it was hard for me to catch the feel
    but, it was still nice and i really liked


    We have more degrees, but less sense,
    More knowledge, But less judgment,
    More experts, but more problems



    nice work
    test
  8. quotive

    quotive 3

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2004
    Messages:
    13,751
    "If you believe in god
    then should know that there is no such thing as luck"

    I know exactly what you talkin' about here man..

    Good piece.. I'm uppin for you cuz you knew and this got SLEPT the fuck on.. so UPPP!
    test
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