The book opens...

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by kyza soza, Dec 7, 2004.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    Been a minute since i been here.

    Anyways this is about giving your heart to someone, i know y'all get the metaphor.


    The book opens...

    Never was opened before
    Closed for 17 years an a day
    Coz that special someone came along
    An hte book shed tears everyday

    Some days the page melted
    The bind's now broken, tattered and torn
    Thinking of finally closing the book
    An sending it back where it came from

    Smudging the print with my tears
    Will it be better again?
    The edges are torn now
    But re-issues are never the same

    A book is a gift
    To be cherished, held and cared for
    Now thrown when a new one comes
    Thats not what they're there for

    Now the words are getting blurry
    I can't find what i'm after
    We're not even close the end
    But will this be the final chapter?


    ...The book closes?​



    30 minute key, if you can call that a key.
    Iuno the rules around here and replying an shiiiiiit, so holla at me, i already fed realms.
    test
  2. -RC-

    -RC- Wordsman

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2004
    Messages:
    123
    A book is a gift
    To be cherished, held and cared for
    Now thrown when a new one comes
    Thats not what they're there for

    awesome way to talk about love, i totally feel you on that...if you love someone you don't forget, no matter what happens, and those memories last forever...that's what love is

    uppin this
    test
  3. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    Thanks man, much luv and thanks.
    test
  4. Sole Sovereign

    Sole Sovereign Hungry But Never Starving

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2001
    Messages:
    2,931
    rough delivery, tired message, not a very original flip on the message at that, with broken descriptions.. really didn't get much from this poem.
    test
  5. quotive

    quotive 3

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2004
    Messages:
    13,755
    ^ I have to disagree.

    I thought it was good, homie.

    "Some days the page melted
    The bind's now broken, tattered and torn
    Thinking of finally closing the book
    An sending it back where it came from"

    Loved this stanza. It isn't original.. but you held this nicely. Liked the metaphor..
    test
  6. akqrate

    akqrate Ear-candy

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2001
    Messages:
    401
    Some days the page melted
    The bind's now broken, tattered and torn
    Thinking of finally closing the book
    An sending it back where it came from

    I FELT THIS STANZA A LOT HOMEBOY, THE REST OF IT WAS COOL, BUT THIS STANZA WAS NICER.
    test
  7. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    Thanks dudes.


    Appreciate the honesty sole.
    test
  8. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    Fly, my lovely's... FLY.
    test
  9. absolute zero

    absolute zero Among the living

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2004
    Messages:
    11,770
    lol.......yeah man i thought it was good too....that font was ill too.....what kind is that?

    anyways, good shit man

    God Bless
    test
  10. Madnick

    Madnick Modern Laureate

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2004
    Messages:
    1,111
    I liked it kyza. I can relate to this piece somewhat but I liked it alot.
    test
  11. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    Uhhh, it was just arial with one of the colors and size one *shrugs*

    Thanks dudes, i'll get at some of your poems when the server isn't lagging.
    test
  12. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    Uppin, please.
    test
  13. Clarksvegas_Dan

    Clarksvegas_Dan Registered Voter

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2004
    Messages:
    767
    It's the neverending story...
    test
  14. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    hahaha, good feed.. thats truth.
    test
  15. ManMadeofAshes

    ManMadeofAshes *DREAMER

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2004
    Messages:
    635
    nice drop. very easy read and great rhythm. as with all good books, the final chapter is always over before you want it to be. The sad said, especially when correlated to love is that it leaves you wanting more.
    test
  16. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    Wise words homie.

    True.. i'll get at your drop, if you did one shortly, rest assured.
    test
  17. MarQuise*

    MarQuise* Can You Hear Me*

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2004
    Messages:
    5,268
    you never told me you wrote anything recently...

    This is beautiful, and im sowie that you had to write this, i know how much shit hurts, and i know that the girl prolly dont deserve you...

    It was simple, delivery was simple, a subject that has been played on b4, but you added your own thing to it...

    I liked this, it touched me, keep writing, you speak the truth...

    *S*
    test
  18. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    The one person is maybe should have touched.
    test
  19. RealMS

    RealMS Ne te quaesiveris extra

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2004
    Messages:
    5,023
    Well, I shared my feedback with you on this one. It's hard to explain what makes one write-unless you put your reason in a simple but explanatory response.
    On the flip side, I'm glad you've resurrected and decided to UN-retire lol. There is so much to write about like it's been said already. This time, keep writing and add on to what may seem "broken thoughts."

    P.S. Your crib is not the graveyard man!!!
    -Much Love
    test
  20. InTheStars

    InTheStars Reflective

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2004
    Messages:
    510
    I thought that this was good, all except the last line...I know it goes with the title, but it just seemed a bit out of place to me anyways. The rest was nice though..
    Much Luv
    STARS
    test
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page

Users Viewing Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 0)