Something I'm working with...

Discussion in 'Open Mic' started by nO gOoD!, Dec 28, 2011.

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  1. nO gOoD!

    nO gOoD! Life Music :: Press Play

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    I stop to write a verse,
    Grab a pad and a pen.
    It started as a curse
    But what's worse,
    I'm at it again.
    It ain't a fad or a trend son,
    I'm living the words,
    And it don't matter where I'm from,
    Just a kid from the burbs.
    I just so happen to have a passion for rappin.
    So when I grab the mic,
    It's lights, camera, action..
    test
  2. Kuja

    Kuja Jack Skellington

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    Short n sweet, =) flowed great .
    test
  3. Spoken~Silence

    Spoken~Silence New Member

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    lol shoulda kept going! haha


    just right to the point, short n simple.....nice work dude
    test
  4. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

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    simple, but not too dynamic really. Efficient but not a trend setter as the lyrics claim.


    Keep working on new ways to say what every wanna be says...
    test
  5. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

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    also I know on paper is different because you can translate the lyrics to sound more dynamic like you do NoGoOD ...not trying to knock you as an MC.

    just dynamic lyrics on paper go a long way IMO
    test
  6. nO gOoD!

    nO gOoD! Life Music :: Press Play

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    I know exactly what you're saying dude, and I'm working on that with this. Because I'm making this onto an audio, however this was just some rough thoughts that I jotted down. Thank you for your feedback, I really appreciate it
    test
  7. nO gOoD!

    nO gOoD! Life Music :: Press Play

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    I'm reworking this verse to have more wordplay and better rhymes. thanks for the feedback everyone
    test
  8. Arsenic P

    Arsenic P A.K.A. PROPOSITION P

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    Yeah I see what you mean but this shit right here aint no where near the shit I've seen from you# just sayin
    test
  9. TheInkwell

    TheInkwell New Member

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    were you experimenting with your style? or were you just referring to working on this piece..

    anyways, it was a real quick one. was there any significance to the way you broke up your lines other than the words rhyming? With shorter pieces, I tend to expect a a lot to be crammed in that shorter amount of space.. It was a nice read, but I didn't get that feeling.. though that kid from the burbs line was pretty nice, imo.
    test
  10. nO gOoD!

    nO gOoD! Life Music :: Press Play

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    thanks inkwell. yeah I was just fuckin around. usually im the type to drop insightful verses with an emotional tone to them. I appreciate the feedback dude
    Biotch! You wish you had a phone like mine...
    test
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