Sleeping Giants

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by Coup d'état, Dec 9, 2010.

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  1. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

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    a lil short. feed back welcome ;)
    -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-


    As a kid I had thoughts
    about sleeping giants
    and thick green leafy stalks

    I wondered a lot too
    as a teenager kid
    thought maybe, perhaps I
    could climb atop one too
    wake them up, to talk things
    ask them knowledge and such
    how they felt about me
    becoming a giant too

    as a grown up big kid
    I gave up and walked
    off to safer places
    and that was that, of course
    I was too old to dream

    as a very old kid
    my walking cane agreed
    until the clouds parted
    and out came two pillars
    of heavy nimbleness
    up I went to a court
    of rumbling giants

    they were the sleeping greats
    so I thought at least then
    the truth, they soon told me
    was that I slept on them



    -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
    test
  2. CrookCity

    CrookCity Member

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    ill poem Coup you are the oracle of wordplay
    test
  3. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

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    well, damn, thanks for reading CrookCity
    test
  4. DethStryque

    DethStryque DethStryque theInvincible

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    DAMN!! The symbolism in this piece is MIGHTY...and its impressive how you narrated your entire cycle of life,from childhood to ascending to heaven...and never once had to descend into plebiean explanations or resort to cliched phrases.I absolutely love how you never stopped describing yourself as a "kid". And this was my favorite poart:

    "as a very old kid
    my walking cane agreed
    until the clouds parted
    and out came two pillars
    of heavy nimbleness
    up I went to a court
    of rumbling giants

    they were the sleeping greats
    so I thought at least then
    the truth, they soon told me
    was that I slept on them"

    Blazin,Coup.
    test
  5. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

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    thank you very much for your feed back and insights.

    did you notice that every line is six syllables?


    anyhow, much gratitude to you.
    test
  6. the omega man

    the omega man so, it goes

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    ofcourse I noticed the syllables

    I also noticed the sexual overtones
    test
  7. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

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    sexual overtones? lol
    test
  8. the omega man

    the omega man so, it goes

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    As a kid you thought about boobs (sleeping giants)
    and your dick would get hard (thick stalks)

    As a teenager you actually thought about what it would be like to touch them and stroke them and ask them questions

    as a grown up you've experienced boobs, but know that you can get in trouble for looking at them directly (either by your wife or your employer) hence, you are too old to dream

    as an old man you no longer give a shit. "Clouds parted.....Two pillars...heavy nimbleness" you ran into a bunch of boobs..."court of rumbling giants"

    then you come to the conclusion that you should have been caressing these boobs your whole life

    You can't tell me there are no sexual overtones in this. Its like "The Rocking Horse Winner" by DH Lawrence....its all about sex...

    Now basically what I get out of your poem is...."don't let no pussy pass u up...u'll regret it later on in life"
    test
  9. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

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    Wow, my mind is blown. I did not do that on purpose but damn, I see what you mean. It's definitely there. The subconscious mind is powerful.

    This poem does mean what you want it to apparently.

    thanks a milli for the break down
    test
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