Same mindframe

Discussion in 'Open Mic' started by Bloody Red, Nov 25, 2012.

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  1. Bloody Red

    Bloody Red New Member

    Joined:
    May 21, 2003
    Messages:
    804
    Its been over 3 years since I recorded and roughly 5 years since I'v written a text open mic.. bare with me , give me some feedback , good or bad .. I open eyes to all of it ..



    It’s the lyrical one the only one to be so lyrical son
    No miracles done got this from staying true till Im done
    No emcee before nor after can stand the slasher
    No matter what factors you mathematically add
    Its actually sad these young cats practically trash
    Bags tied soaked in gas toasted ash roasted
    My devotion plus indulgence cause for promotion
    The closest to the top focused like bifocals
    I don’t meditate the currency but levitate urgently
    Not a feather weight but you hesitate and I’ll set you ‘strait’
    Permanently
    I know about purp hash mollys halves
    Who don’t know about tossing back shots and crack
    So why often cats drop the same topics that
    Don’t have one positive influence on optics fact
    Have no purpose but feeding worthless copy cats
    Following each others cracks down a rocky path
    But let me halt the negative imagery simply because
    I don’t agree mentally with these industry thugs
    I’d rather preach to the ministry about chemistry of
    Flowing and wordplay that instrumentally buzzed
    Feels good to mimic me then do so instantly
    Just be sure to mention pre say I’m nice like strippers be
    But I’m never no bitch so watch your mouth or it could be
    Some ass wipen like koshcheck go down in history
    Sending jabs physically to your abs and kid-ney
    I’m like some hard tissue your ass will remember me
    But don’t get mislead life I love dearly
    Don’t get confused about the hate I read verses clearly
    Trying to figure where peers be
    What type of mood sincerely I could put they ears B







    http://board.rapmusic.com/open-mic/1339500-chase-murda-scroll-files-u-wish-i.html

    http://board.rapmusic.com/open-mic/1341230-happy-veteran-day-burn-wax-my-candle-got-ax.html

    http://board.rapmusic.com/open-mic/1340065-chase-murda-scroll-files-parental-advisory.html

    http://board.rapmusic.com/open-mic/1341425-l-kross-presents-ransom.html
    test
  2. Bloody Red

    Bloody Red New Member

    Joined:
    May 21, 2003
    Messages:
    804
    give me a second .. already be replying to people just getting some linkage
    test
  3. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    4,096
    I'm just a fly on the wall when it comes to what this piece is talking bout and to who and why, but I'm OK with that because the flow was beautiful and on point, and that is for real; making this written interesting to read. Well written, and I suspect flow and rhyme were a focus here, and it paid off well. It had personal feel to it...It feels unique.

    One gripe is the actual content. 90% of verses cover the same thing. To me , this was a swag and flow piece and it, content wise, felt generic and unspecific...this was a blanket statement, covering all the cliches. then again, everything is a cliche, and you hit this out of box into fresh air.

    the skill of the writing left me shaking my head in a positive way.

    Drop some more, keep it up friend.
    test
  4. MrFlux001

    MrFlux001 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 31, 2012
    Messages:
    205
    I really enjoyed that segment. The rest kind of dwindled to nothing for me.
    test
  5. Exxxxis

    Exxxxis .......................

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2013
    Messages:
    30
    What Flux quoted was your best section, I also thought this line was slick:

    No matter what factors you mathematically add

    However the remainder was hmm...how should I put it, quite bland in comparison.

    ...Stay upwards.
    test
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