Discussion in 'The Rapmusic Storytelling/Topical League' started by Tacky Jones, Jul 18, 2011.
kaleidoscopes are gay.
KRS One and kids who still listen to him are gay. Nigga hasn't elevated his style since 1980.
You still watching a black & white tv nigga?
come on man, dont go the "nigga" route... plus you could learn alot about delivery from KRS One ... i heard some of your audios.
So GL? is Stone cold? Okay, I'm The Rock, then.
Give me a cool actor or something in that list, Shadow!
You're joking right?
Side note: @Shadow, please do something about all these newfags and their non-stop hate voting because their panties are twisted up over the fact that they can't write to save their lives.
once i read your work next week i can get a vibe of who you are
however....We'll see if you can measure up to
GL -Since i'm up against you, T.a.C will make decisions on our match up as far as hate votes go. Unless he sleeps lol
Another fucking no show?
Oh Nom....I'll give u feedback tomorrow....i have a feeling he'll show up late or something
When you take a line out of context it most times it won't make sense. Think of my writing as rings in a tree, that's how I try to build a verse, but not just outward, in 360 degrees.
It seems you are grammatical but your reading comprehension and creativity need further development.
Here is the passage you are referring to.
Not yet meant to be,
my inner being, seeing, something
more than this mortal scene's, schemes,
from day to day, kept me at bay,
from sensing satisfaction that simple pleasures generate
as worldly ways make men forsake their fate,
saturated placated placed dazed in a maze.
When I say "Saturated placated placed in dazed in a maze"
the subject would be
"Worldly ways make men forsake their fate"
Saturated doesn't just mean wet... lol... it means FULL.
So men get full on worldly pleasures... they are placated, their desires and hungers met...
in doing so they are "placed dazed in maze"... dazed as in they are not focused to see what lies beyond the here and now, which is the maze.
Now back it up even further and we see that the characters inner being doesn't allow him to gain the satisfaction that most people do from living such a basic existence. He sees with his soul not just his consciousness.
If you read the Lord of the Rings series, you would know Frodo (who is in the painting) is a Hobbit from the Shire, where all people want to do is eat and make merry. No adventuring no quests.
Frodo never fit in, he was destined for something more but he never knew what it was always felt peculiar, until he travelled in his uncles footsteps, and volunteered to go to the heart of the Dark Lords kingdom and destroy the One Ring.
So I'm tying it somewhat into the picture, but on a more broader spectrum..
it's basically a shout out to all the people who never felt quite right with what
society is selling, the vision marketed of what life is supposed to be about.
it's a reflection of what I feel sometimes, that I have a duty a cause to something greater than myself and that it's ok to think different than everyone around me.
Anyway, it's really hard to condense all that into a few lines, and then make the words rhyme, but also developing as a story with direction and an end focus...
So my apologies for any confusion... even as I create a realm beyond your understanding
but I will take pains to create better bridges.
lmao, I love when kids try to call out writers on what they wrote only to get cock slapped back to reality.
Well done Cigma.
damnit i post late, yet again. dsfbjsofs
my bad guys... but atleast it wasn't a no-show verse this week
apologies as well
i've been somewhat poetically brain clouded. my ability to articulate what i see has left me. it dosent mean i suck it just means i'm having writersblock. and just because you are able to explain what you meant to say doesnt mean you said it in the poem.
Obsent, he showed exactly how it was demonstrated in the verse so please go crawl back into your mother's womb because you're about as useful as a fetus. Just because you can't see the correlation doesn't mean it wasn't there when it was fed to you on a spoon.
dude obsent... he explained what he said IN the poem... so clearly it was there... =\ maybe if you give his explanation another read....
oh, and writers block has to do with you writing, not you understanding..
Ink, don't state such obvious things to obsent, he clearly doesn't get it.
thank's for the vote's champ's. get to my share of voting later when i get a better internet connection..
good job coup!
the metaphysics of Frodo, it's tight.
Separate names with a comma.