Question for the ladies

Discussion in 'Ladies Lounge' started by SeeSon, Jan 7, 2010.

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  1. SeeSon

    SeeSon New Member

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    Can anyone give me insight as to why some women get upset at their man watching porn and/or going to strip clubs?
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  2. Imperial1

    Imperial1 For pressed ones only

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    Because it gets to a point were it takes away a lot of the attention that we want from them. They start making it seem as if they are no longer interested in us and therefore pushing us away. So if that happens, we're going to end up finding someone else who will give us the attention that you are giving to the strippers and that pornstars.

    And I don't see how anyone gets addicted to porn. I learned what I needed to learn from it, now when I see it, I get bored.

    Imperial1
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  3. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    most likely jealousy...not that females are jealous of the pornstars and strippers...but the thought of their man getting pleasure or being turned on by anyone other than them is not something they'd be keen on. insecurity plays a part too.

    i used to feel that way. but now that i've matured i use porn and the strip club as a tool. my man has done a good job of makin me feel wanted in secure in our relationship so i know he doesn't want to take those girls home. so we watch the porn together and then he gives it to me. it works out [cooljoe]
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  4. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    oh! but i will say, ANYTHING in excess is unhealthy. so if my man made it a HABIT of going to the strip club and was trickin off major money on another woman or porn there would be a problem. that shit would get shut down stat.
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  5. SeeSon

    SeeSon New Member

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    Thanks for the replies, I appreciate them
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  6. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    Did you mean to write "ASAP?"


    Strip clubs are really a waste of money... I don't go as much as I used to.

    I still like porn, though.

    I think men are just wired to like variety and to be with many different women... strip clubs and porn provide that fantasy... safely.

    I mean, would you rather your man go out and fuck many different women or stay at home and jerk to many different women?

    The current state of affairs is some serious imprisonment on our natural urges.
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  7. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    no. i meant STAT.

    it is derived from the Latin "Statim"
    in medical settings it's used to mean "immediately or without delay."
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  8. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    Hey, are you in the medical field?
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  9. ANNE CAMERON

    ANNE CAMERON New Member

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    A woman doesn't give a man her phone number so he can text her.

    Look, you're lucky you got a phone number at all doing something so indirect and lacking-in-confidence as "talking" on Facebook. Please don't screw it up by continuing to contact her indirectly.
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  10. Joro

    Joro New Member

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    ^^^good advice Anne. When a chatroom girl slides you the digits you KNOW she wants the dick. No need to play around anymore.
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  11. Joro

    Joro New Member

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    In my experience girls I've had relationships with only get mad at my watching porn when they realize my dirty talk to the screen is nastier and more passionate than when I'm actually fucking.
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  12. samii so sexii

    samii so sexii ..sunkist siren..

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    pursuing my nursing degree [cooljoe]
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  13. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    Some women feel that pornography sets their men up with unrealistic expectations regarding female sexuality... expectations that leave their men frustrated and upset, once they are not able to fulfill them.

    I could say the same about women and romance novels.
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  14. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    The wife is a nurse practitioner... as soon as you explained that definition, I do remember hearing that from her.... everytime she talks her jargon, I talk mine... gosh darn showoff!!
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  15. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    What percentage of women would you say actually feel that way?

    I think it's more of them feeling like they aren't enough... I mean, women get insecurity thrown into their faces ever since pre-school... who has longer hair?, who's prettier?, who's thinner?... and then when you get to junior high and high school, it's who has the bigger boobs? and if you're black, who has the bigger butt?, who has the hottest boyfriend?, who gets the flyest valentine and b-day gifts?, who wears the hottest clothes?

    Men... I don't know... it's all about height, muscles and dick size... oh, and later on, it's about money and cars.
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  16. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    Those unrealistic expectations set by porn (among other things) are what lead to those insecurities.

    Porn is all about Mens' fantasies, not reality; the women have perfect bodies, dont require foreplay or any emotional connection, never get their period, never too tired from a hard days work to have sex, never too upset by their partners disrespect or neglect to perform, always have earth-shattering orgasms and absolutely LOVE and cherish spunk being spewn in their eyes by random awkward strangers who just so happen to show up at their doors to cut the cable on. Women are basically sex objects, there for mens pleasure, who expect nothing in return.

    Repeated viewing of this kinda material does have an effect on the dynamics of male/female relationships IRL.
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  17. NwThtUKnwMe

    NwThtUKnwMe NAIVE

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    I can't say that I feel insecure when finding out my husband is watching porn, its how he reacts to me finding out. What I find most annoying is the lying.

    The first time I found out my husband watches porn, I came home from work and he was asleep and forgot to close the window to the movie he was watching. So when I asked him about it, of course, "I don't watch porn, I don't know what your talking about." Even when he saw the shit on the computer, he continued to lie. Its been 3 years since and he really wants me to believe that he doesn't watch porn (rolling my eyes).

    I guess I just don't see the point in jacking off, when you can have sex instead. Especially if you feel you have to lie and sneak around like a fucking 12 year old.

    Tight eyes is right, this does effect the dynamics of relationships to the point where you just don't feel like trying.
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  18. h.wood

    h.wood IMAGINATION SUPER STAR

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    how stupid are guys that some girl wiggles without a shirt and guys hand over their hard earned money like mindless nubs. "she smiled bc she likes you-lol" idiots. besides its gross.
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  19. Ignorant

    Ignorant Village Idiot

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    I feel you... but I feel that we're all sex objects and there is nothing wrong with that, because sex is a necessary impulse.

    I don't feel threatened or insecure by Tyson Beckford, Brad Pitt or any Chippendale model, stripper... Mr. Marcus, Wesley Pipes or Lexington Steele doesn't make me feel like any less than a man, either.

    I don't know... my confidence is healthy and my perspective is realistic and proportioned to the circumstance.
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  20. tight-eyes

    tight-eyes Such a F*cking Lady!

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    Yes, sexuality is natural, but its only one of multiple dimensions that make up our existence. To try to reduce a human being to an "object" is problematic in that it fails to acknowledge that human beings are much more complex than an inanimate blow-up doll, whose sole function is to provide sexual gratification. We humans are not one-way streets. We have other layers and needs that need to be satisfied and engaged in order maintain healthy relationship.

    Like I said, porn is about fantasy. The characters are typically portrayed as one-dimensional objects... their spiritual, emotional, financial realities are completely ignored (see Maslows heirarchy of needs). Its not realistic. But some get caught up and forget that real life isnt like that. Its when you start comparing your real life to that fantasy and become dissatisfied that leads to problems. Espcially when you start holding your partner to that unrealistic standard.

    It doesnt matter how secure you are with yourself... yourself isnt the only person in the relationship. And as long as your partner is displeased with the fact that you dont live up to the unrealistic standards they have set up for you in their mind, you're gonna have problems.
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