Marching (pt 3-finale)

Discussion in 'Open Mic' started by Tacky Jones, Nov 18, 2013.

  1. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones

    Feb 25, 2008
    The light is so bright
    My eyes squint as I'm walking through what looks like a tunnel
    Towards the illuminated opening like a moon lighting up the whole night
    Nothing to the sides, so I cant go right
    Theres no left, so I just go forward
    Marching for what feels like miles
    Enough sweat to fill 5 viles
    This nights wild, as I keep pushing on
    With no other options, feeling this could be wrong
    No clue where I am, trusting instinct
    Noticing no heart rate like nothings in me
    But I keep marching...

    I dont know why I'm doing this, but then again does anyone
    We go through the motions of the day to day, whether you're 52 or 21
    You do what you need to, the tasks assigned
    But how often do you stop and ask em why?
    Or do you continue to chase pussy and a dollar
    Not giving a damn who you hurt and not taking the time to call her
    Not your grandma, aunt, and not your mom
    But believe you're gonna act like you loved her when she's gone
    And the house is being split up and you're about to cash in
    And your brothers getting his cut and you're askin why did she have him
    But I keep marching...

    As I get to the light, tired, walking at a burly pace
    I peak through and to my shock I see the pearly gates
    St Peter's eyes and mine lock, I'm shocked
    My minds lost in surprise as I've had my doubt that were life long
    But to see its real, I couldnt believe my eyes
    Unable to muster up anything better, I blurt, "see, I tried
    I tried to do right but only got a murder-suicide"
    "You tried? Lemme guess, you didnt mean to hurt her, you could try
    To lie, but we know whats inside and this is fake
    But before we send you to hell we'll hear your side in this quick debate
    But I keep marching...

    Is heaven for the good? is hell for the worst people
    Your soul can rest eternally in a paradise where God will disperse evil
    But who decides whats good and whats bad
    Is it by how one acts or whats inside? Fuck that
    Did i try to save that woman because I'm good?
    Nah, I wanted to be rewarded, my soul saved, I should
    Rot in hell, because I could give a fuck about mankind
    So bury me deep below so I can be a landmine
    But believe me when I tell you I've got a lot to say
    Cuz if I'm the only one in the wrong then dont let me walk away
    But I keep marching...

    St. Peter pulls a lever as the gate opens wide
    He tells me to wait, hopin' high
    That I've said the keyword or gave the right answer
    But what I saw next coulda killed me like cancer
    A familiar face belonging to someone I never met
    Come in to view, along with the silhouette
    It was Jesus, no way, I can't believe this
    He who gave me advice, but I'd never heed his
    Words of wisdom, I wrote them off, I thought I knew
    Now I'm pleading my case to him to save my soul, I'm doomed
    But I keep marching...

    Now I never lived how I was told to in the bible
    But I always figured in my life I'd have a while
    To make it right, take some time to make it fixed
    But its hard when those appointed to teach are raping kids
    Those supposedly sacred souls with this evil beast within
    And my grandpa donated so much time and money to the church, why did he get sick?
    Why do man made laws govern the land
    And why do those in charge cover the fact
    Is it because all the corruption runs deeper
    Than we can see, once a criminal but now you'll keep your
    Job safe, things need to be handled
    Cuz those in charge dont want the bad light of a scandal
    Man fucked up again and I hope in hell they'll all be buried
    Along with the notion that 2 men or women can't be married
    Did you see that transgender kid set on fire cuz in his heart
    He feels he's a girl, where do you think that ignorance starts?
    What about Laramie, do gays have this plan to hurt the nation?
    No, thats why I've refused to live by man's interpretation
    This damn determination that two mans an abomination
    Is ridiculous, so I stand and applaud the states in Obama's nation
    That have taken the steps to end disgrace
    Lord, you're a man of love but your people preach hate
    Thats why when I was young I was an atheist to the extreme
    Baptized Catholic but couldnt believe what they would preach
    Until I realized I could do things my own way
    And kneel besides my bed and pray to you my own way
    See, I wont join the Cult, but I still am a believer
    Like Common I'm a dreamer that one day we can see Earth
    At peace, but first we gotta see through the lame stuff
    Fighting over religion, think of who we're killingn in the name of
    God...a man who preached peace
    Do you think he wants you killing his children over YOUR beliefs
    Or are you a hypocrit just looking to click a clip
    With ya clique over a book like a simpleton
    Get a grip, I hope you all burn in hell
    I said I hope you all burn in hell, I hope you heard it well
    Because heaven and hell is a joke, so I dont care if you damn me
    Cuz frankly, Its like telling a kid if they're good they can have candy
    Are they good to be good or good for the reward?
    Good when someones looking then acting out when bored
    Behind closed doors a deviant, then ask you to fix em
    Are they good people or just good at working the system
    If my praying twice a day aint enough
    To get me in heaven, I never gave a fuck
    Because I'm going in the dirt and nowhere else
    But when I see the power abuse in religion, I hope theres hell
    Ya know, I started this pleading for my soul
    But now that I think about it, I dont care where I go
    I dont deserve mercy with all the blood on my hands
    So I put it entirely up to you to decide where I land
    But i appologize to my sister, my family
    The girl with the red suburban, her fam and finally
    I'm sorry to every girl I've cheated on, who I've hurt
    With my words or the frieds I've desert
    To all those I bullied, who in the park their moms would say that kids bad, or
    For those who've tried to get in to heaven, cuz none of that shit matters
    I love you Lord, but I dont belong in heaven
    I dont belong in heaven.

    All of a sudden everything goes black and I go back
    To where this all started, in a room so black
    With a bright light right in front of my eye sight
    Staring in to it, so bright I might blind
    This is when I realized I'm stuck in a dream
    Full of pitch black, I've got nothin to see
    Everything is on fuckin repeat, and I'm in casket
    Living eternity in this scene
    But I keep marching...
    • +Rep +Rep x 1
  2. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones

    Feb 25, 2008
  3. Nu'maaN

    Nu'maaN Anu'naki, Nuqqa.

    Aug 27, 2005
    nice, enjoyed this read.

    i reckon this is your most personal piece thus far.

  4. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones

    Feb 25, 2008
    thank you, Nu'qqa

    definitely the first time i've written about my look on religion. kinda expected to be struck dead that night hahaha
  5. Shadow

    Shadow Kotaro's Master

    Apr 11, 2004
    @Tacky Jones - So I loved the story, the only issue i had with this was the wording. There were things like "this nights wild" bothered me because of how elegant the story was being told.

    "Is heaven for the good? is hell for the worst people
    Your soul can rest eternally in a paradise where God will disperse evil"

    The rhyme here feels unnatural when reading. I think you could have said, 'the worst of people/disperse of evil' or "cursed people/paradise where God dispersed evil" kind of thing.

    Overall the story was great and i enjoyed the read despite how long it was :p. Good work son

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