Lies

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by EL FEROS, Jun 19, 2003.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. EL FEROS

    EL FEROS New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2003
    Messages:
    8
    Lies
    Cant Really Go On Like This
    My Life Cant Go On Like This
    I Hate This Shit.
    I Really Cant Take Shit
    I Just Snap For Anythin,i Hate It.
    Cant Really Go On Like This
    Lies Just Fuck It Up
    I Just Dont Like Bein Told Lies.
    When She Left Me It Was Really
    Fuck Up
    She Left Me For A Lie
    She Believed Them
    Not Me.
    What Did I Do Wrong
    For Her To Treat Me Like This.
    She Left Me
    And Could Never Get Her Back
    She's Long Gone
    And Can Never Catch Up
    I Loved Her,i Still Do.
    I Could Never Let Her Go.
    She'll Always Be In My Heart
    test
  2. Infonation

    Infonation Info for the Nation

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2003
    Messages:
    1,016
    This was an o.k. piece. No rhyme pattern, and there didn't have to be one. Your true feeling was expressed throught this written topic, and that's what made it good. *Stay up* ^One
    test
  3. skandelous_lala

    skandelous_lala back from the dead

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2000
    Messages:
    26,748
    i agree that it was a decent piece..and unlike infonation i don't think that every piece of poetry needs to have a rhyme pattern, some sourt of rythem is nice tho...and the way i was reading it i picked up a lil. once again tho...we're reading it here how we intrepret so its hard to say how the author intended it to be heard.

    anyways...this wasn't bad at all...in the beginning i read it in an angry way and then i sensed some resignation at the end. not too bad at all, keep droppin. :)
    test
  4. varentao

    varentao New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2003
    Messages:
    765
    Written with a certain amoutn of rawness. This had a to the point, from the heart like feel to it...

    simple, yet well put. I liked it...

    ..resp..
    test
  5. augee.ali

    augee.ali Lively Up Yourself...

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2003
    Messages:
    1,734
    I say you kick that lyin bitch in her stomach! LOl nah, on the real...this sounds like a rant you had to get off your chest...keep that shit comin'.
    test
  6. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2001
    Messages:
    17,331
    yeah seems like a lil keystyle you did to get something off ya chest. Nicely done

    one luv
    test
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page

Users Viewing Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 0)