K-i-s-s-i-n-g...

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by MarQuise*, Dec 16, 2004.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. MarQuise*

    MarQuise* Can You Hear Me*

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2004
    Messages:
    5,268
    So, this was posted a long time ago, but im re-posting it because i just recently came across a song which i adore, and it jus reminded me of my poem...

    Theres also another few stanza's to this, and thats because i asked Allnakey to collabo wit me, but this time i thought i wud post up jus MY work...

    Its a lil bit of me, and the way i like to do certain things...

    Eyes close in
    Lips draw closer
    We breathe each others air
    We close our eyes
    Our lips collide
    My lips entwine with yours
    We are but one
    My tongue plays with your senses
    A shiver down my spine
    Your hand on mine
    Playing with your hair
    While you gently pull at mine
    This kiss leaves me in ecstasy
    Desperate for me
    I tug at your bottom lip
    A gentle bite
    I hear you moan
    I pull away for a second
    You pull me back in
    Your heart beats faster
    The kiss becomes so intense
    I yearn for more
    Of these kisses that I adore
    Your hands trace my hips
    I work my way down using my lips
    Kissing every inch of your neck
    From your cheeks
    Your taste, so amazing, so sweet…*
    test
  2. nathedawg

    nathedawg New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2003
    Messages:
    1,804
    Eyes close in
    Lips draw closer
    We breathe each others air
    We close our eyes
    Our lips collide
    My lips entwine with yours
    We are but one
    My tongue plays with your senses
    A shiver down my spine
    Your hand on mine
    Playing with your hair
    While you gently pull at mine
    This kiss leaves me in ecstasy
    Desperate for me
    I tug at your bottom lip
    A gentle bite
    I hear you moan
    I pull away for a second
    You pull me back in
    Your heart beats faster
    The kiss becomes so intense
    I yearn for more
    Of these kisses that I adore
    Your hands trace my hips
    I work my way down using my lips
    Kissing every inch of your neck
    From your cheeks
    Your taste, so amazing, so sweet…*

    yo, this was some mad heavy love shit... I love reading these kind of poems, especially from a female, I think its mainly because females know more about love, yeah that's right, I said it, females have got their shit together from time to time...

    love the imagery you exposed in the poem, this is mos def gonna be one of those poems I read from time to time... thank you for the read marquise

    and i really mean that!!.... peace rep up
    test
  3. Catch TWENTY 2

    Catch TWENTY 2 Poet Extrodinaire

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2003
    Messages:
    569
    This reminds me of me and the most beautiful woman in the world, my fiance! Sounds like us when we kiss. Thought you were writing this for us.

    My tongue plays with your senses
    A shiver down my spine

    Damn, she does it to me every time!
    This was a great way to describe a kiss and the things that go along with it. Good read!
    Ja Bless!
    test
  4. mr nitty

    mr nitty A registered user

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2001
    Messages:
    1,405
    this was so descriptive. I am saving this.
    test
  5. MarQuise*

    MarQuise* Can You Hear Me*

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2004
    Messages:
    5,268
    aww, thanx Mr.Nitty, CAtch Twenty2, and TooShort21...

    Im glad ya'll like it, an to 'CAtch Twenty2', it touched me that you could be reminded of how it feels when you kiss your own girlfriend, althou i hope its slighty diff lol, coz this is MY way of kissin hehe =)


    awww thanx again peoples, and TooShort, touchin wha you said =)

    Much Lv to ya'll =)

    *S*
    test
  6. Novaman: RaWKiLLa

    Novaman: RaWKiLLa New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2001
    Messages:
    2,253
    This was some nice writing. Made me think back to when I use to slob the girls down. Keep it up.
    test
  7. NYCE©2004

    NYCE©2004 I Swallow for posts

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2004
    Messages:
    2,337
    the part that stood out to me the most was this below..

    My tongue plays with your senses
    A shiver down my spine
    Your hand on mine
    Playing with your hair
    While you gently pull at mine


    and my fav. prt from the whole skeme is this below

    This kiss leaves me in ecstasy
    Desperate for me
    I tug at your bottom lip
    A gentle bite


    this wuz goo'shit...

    we should collab on audio..
    test
  8. lpoet

    lpoet POET

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2002
    Messages:
    12,678
    this was beautiful

    just one beautiful expierence

    very captivating..really drew me in and gave me a great pic of the situation

    Upin for the sleepers
    test
  9. MC_Paste

    MC_Paste

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2004
    Messages:
    2,727
    wow this cnat be imaginative for sure.. u wrote it one night after sharing a kiss wit hte man of ur dreams

    beautiful shit
    test
  10. kyza soza

    kyza soza This way up.

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    Messages:
    16,576
    Captured the essence of the first moments in a few imagery driven words.

    Beautiful.
    test
  11. ARCHITECT

    ARCHITECT New Member

    Joined:
    May 20, 2000
    Messages:
    11,043
    this was real deep i like how you express yourself
    test
  12. _REAPAH_

    _REAPAH_ Mello Dee

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2001
    Messages:
    22,422
    Wow... Amazing with the detail, i love this one... Great.
    test
  13. This reminded me of a piece I have been working on, it was beautifully sensual, the tracing of the hips, the sweet kisses, all believable, all concievable.

    keep it up.
    test
  14. hebrew_thuglife

    hebrew_thuglife New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2003
    Messages:
    735
    this isn't poetry, your just telling it as it is. you need poetic context, in other wprds be more indepth, poetry is more complex! but anyways its okay not bad, wasn;t really feeling this my frend be good.
    test
  15. MarQuise*

    MarQuise* Can You Hear Me*

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2004
    Messages:
    5,268
    Poetry isnt all about havin poetic content, its about feeling and emotion my friend, i take wha you say, and i appreciate your feedback, but it doesnt need to be more in depth, i write from my heart, and write to what is true to me, so whether or not i put my all in to it, or jus a little bit of of me in to it, is different...

    How can u say this isnt poetry? it doesnt NEED poetic context...

    This is me, this is the way i like to do things, so to me it was an in-depth poem, talkin about my kissing, my feelings...

    *S*
    test
  16. hebrew_thuglife

    hebrew_thuglife New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2003
    Messages:
    735
    then its lyrics. not poetry. although every lyric is poetry, the poetry realm is a diff. kind of poetry
    test
  17. MarQuise*

    MarQuise* Can You Hear Me*

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2004
    Messages:
    5,268
    lol, plz....

    wha you on about? they not lyrics, this is MY poetry, My feelings, My emotions, why must i repeat myself? Especially to some like you?

    And you think this is the first time ive ever posted in the realm? Comin in here and tellin me 'the realm is different' hahaha...

    In future if you dont mind, plz dont comment on my poetry, i didnt mind what you said first, but now you jus str8 annoyin the fuk outta me...
    test
  18. hebrew_thuglife

    hebrew_thuglife New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2003
    Messages:
    735
    ^ temper temper

    all i said was it should be in the open mic, instead of here. okay my friend its not a good peice for here, it was not on line on here. it was not poetry, but mere lyrics for audio my friend.
    test
  19. MarQuise*

    MarQuise* Can You Hear Me*

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2004
    Messages:
    5,268
    test
  20. hebrew_thuglife

    hebrew_thuglife New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2003
    Messages:
    735
    ^ k-i-s-s-i-n-g- jada KISS












































    Mariah? hmmmmmmmm........
    test
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page

Users Viewing Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 0)