I washed the paint off with more paint

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by billy nomates., Mar 19, 2012.

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  1. billy nomates.

    billy nomates. rain cancels play.

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    Messages:
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    I was still peeling wallpaper
    Trying to find who lived here before
    When the sun came up
    Yellowed by the years

    Leaving marks on the paper
    That came off on my hands
    And lined my skin
    With someone else's

    So I crafted my own wallpaper
    From paintings I'd made
    My smile outlined in gold leaf
    My face like a child's

    The day before summer
    • Hot Thread Hot Thread x 1
    test
  2. L u c y

    L u c y (Administrator) SWERVE

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    25,550
    gorgeous, I dont know how you do it just using words & I know its a huge cliche but you really do paint a picture with your use of language.

    clever lad
    test
  3. Coup d'état

    Coup d'état Don't believe the hype

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    this is a very nostalgic peice...it's sunny and reflective bro...nice punch to the chin
    test
  4. patrown

    patrown student for life

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    ... I am now officially, a fan.

    may i please have your autograph?
    test
  5. ~Eloquent

    ~Eloquent Narcissistic....

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    hmm no matter how much you try to limit certain memories youll never be able to forget what happened with what which made you,you today
    test
  6. Brit Boi Gee

    Brit Boi Gee raison d'être

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    52,338
    This was a beauty, Nom. While I read it I wondered if this would read even better if it was structured in iambic lines instead of an irregular structure. So I took the liberty to see what it would look like structured this way. See what you think.

    I was still peeling wallpaper trying to
    find who lived here before, when the sun came up.
    Yellowed by the years

    Leaving marks on paper
    That came off on my hands and lined my skin
    with someone else's.

    So I crafted my own wallpaper from
    paintings I'd made, my smile outlined in gold leaf
    My face like a child's. The day before summer.
    test
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