I just got a REALLY sad mental image..

Discussion in 'The Alley' started by RM Legend, Dec 23, 2007.

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  1. RM Legend

    RM Legend New Member

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    Christmas eve,

    .

    .

    .

    .

    .

    Double ML sitting at his table eating dinner by himself with one of those paper party hats on and and one of those things two people pull from both ends and it makes that crack! sound sitting next to his plate..the house is dead silent.He scoffs down his last bit of brocherly,sips his water then get's up walks to the door..he jams one end of the cracker thing in it and pulls it.A little toy falls out and a piece of paper with a joke written on it..He picks up the toy and sits it back on the table then sits down and reads the joke..The joke is something along the lines of:

    Q.What has a huge mouth but is tiny?

    A.A hypopoti-mouse

    Double cracks up histerically and slaps his knee.The neighbors wonder what the hell is so funny next door.Still laughing,he gets up and puts his dinner plate in the sink then goes and turns on the tv..whilst still wearing his red party hat.The Suns are on tv and they are winning by 5 points.Half way through the third quater Nash and Marion are both injured in a freak collision of heads.They are taken off the court on stretchers only to later find out,they will not return to the game of basketball.

    Poor Double.

    He had already arranged a sex worker to his house a couple of hours earlier,since it is this time of year he got a discount which he really needed because he dosn't get paid very much.he notices she left her pantys on the floor.Double picks up the pantys and sniffs them untill he notices dried semen on them.He quickly throws them back on the ground.

    He wonders what to do and he wonders what the rest of society must do on Christmas eve.Double then begins to shake and a cold sweat begins,he is having withdrawles.He quickly runs to his computer and turns it on.He is shaking uncontrollibly now and rips the party hat off his head with a sudden burst of anger.He begins franticly biting his nails untill the computer has booted up.He types in rapmusic.com as quick as possible on internet explorer and goes into Lipstick Alley..still shaking he looks for a name,much like a lion stalks it's prey.He sees the name Verb as the last post to one of his threads.Double begins smiling and his eyes light up as if he was just presented a million dollar cheque.He almost lunges forward so his eyes are about 3 inches from his monitor and begins typing..

    "lmao@Fidel not realizin' Double is the smartest alpha male on the planet :D"

    "I am the most heterosexual man on the plant muh' fucker"

    "You have just been sonned by the truth"

    He waits for the reply but everyone on RM has better things to do than sit on the computer.He is now hugely disapointed and feels how it feels after you masterbate..that dirty,ashamed feeling.

    "Fuck it" he says.He then goes and puts a present for himself under his plastic miniture Christmas tree,it's a new pair of Timbs.He then calls it a night and goes to bed..He can hardly sleep the night off..He is excited about waking up in the morning and finding his present.After tossing and turning all night he finally get's to sleep..He has a nightmare about terrorists taking out his position.It feels real and he sweats prefusely.He wakes up 2 hours later and runs to the Christmas tree..He sees his present,a huge grin appears on his face.He opens the present and sees what he got himself.

    "Wooooooo!" he says,much like Rick Flair.

    "Thank you Double your the most alpha male on the planet!"

    He takes the boots out of the box and envisions putting them on and going for a walk..much like when a kid gets a new toy they have to show off.He tries the boots on..

    Two sizes too small.
    test
  2. Tacit

    Tacit Devourer of Funny

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    What is the point of this?
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  3. RM Legend

    RM Legend New Member

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    What was the point of replying?
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  4. DannyC

    DannyC Stay golden, pony boy.

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    im sorry but that was, from start to finish, fucking hilarious.





    and this gem:

    "brocherly".

    classic.
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  5. DannyC

    DannyC Stay golden, pony boy.

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    i want to quote the best part of that but its too hard to pick just one.
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  6. kingjafaar

    kingjafaar New Member

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    Horrible thread.
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  7. RM Legend

    RM Legend New Member

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    Frankly I've never written the word before in my life so yea it's probly spelt wrong.
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  8. RM Legend

    RM Legend New Member

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    Unlike the rest in this forum,yea.
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  9. Look im Gangsta

    Look im Gangsta New Member

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    I dont read long threads unless its Teq, Riz or Pyro.
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  10. RM Legend

    RM Legend New Member

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    Thanks for letting me know because I really want you reading my threads!

    Go find your shoe scumbag.
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  11. Look im Gangsta

    Look im Gangsta New Member

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    I'm exactly the type of person you want a 'lol' from.
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  12. Tacit

    Tacit Devourer of Funny

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    I wanted an answer.
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  13. RM Legend

    RM Legend New Member

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    I've never thought your funny actually.Your threads seem kind of pointless to me most of the time.
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  14. RM Legend

    RM Legend New Member

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    But I don't respect you on here.
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  15. Look im Gangsta

    Look im Gangsta New Member

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    Like I said...
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  16. Riz

    Riz Well-Known Member

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    [funny]

    How'd you remember that name, MIZARI?
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  17. Tacit

    Tacit Devourer of Funny

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    :O
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  18. RM Legend

    RM Legend New Member

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    Cause he said it yesterday,Riz.
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  19. kingjafaar

    kingjafaar New Member

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    No, you and your threads fit in perfectly with the rest of this forum, believe me.
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  20. reciprocity

    reciprocity just a baby

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    I love Riz and Pyro
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