Her Corruption and Never-Blooming

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by McGirth, Oct 15, 2003.

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  1. McGirth

    McGirth New Member

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    they spoke subversively in undertones - puncturing her
    she was young and could not fight them off - beleiving in fairy tales of quixotic romance, entranced by they devious lies
    they fed them to her and she feasted on this phoney knowledged beleiving to better herself but instead bettering them
    habituating to this way of life she kept on living till she could no longer afford the corruption they were giving
    so she gave her body away in her early years -robbed of her soul as she became what she used to fear: a whore.

    still a child - but with a different ruler then before
    a daughter with many fathers that rule her tyrannycally by the hour
    and sometimes she even feels at peace when she overloads her senses by
    Trading away the tokens she received for her submission
    then she's empty - so she open's up her slot for their sadition
    she fills her soul with bought distractions for another minute
    she hopes she'll never have to think about reality again

    But one day it catches up to her as she glimpses in the mirror
    she sees herself bare and empty - her looks beginning to fade...
    her once luscious body sags she's turning grey
    the only thing she had: release. she can't get anymore
    those that fed her, bled her dry. There's no love: she's just a whore
    now she lays in her bed, empty, longing for death
    her mind is catatonic as she stares off into nothingness
    test
  2. illpoetical

    illpoetical raising the bar everyday

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    this is nice i liked the way it is written
    test
  3. Nebulaz

    Nebulaz fear God, not man

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    "habituating to this way of life she kept on living till she could no longer afford the corruption they were giving
    so she gave her body away in her early years -robbed of her soul as she became what she used to fear: a whore."

    "she sees herself bare and empty - her looks beginning to fade...
    her once luscious body sags she's turning grey"

    A story very nicely told. Glamoured in both imagery and vocabulary, to immerse me and devulge information.

    ^ were some of the lines that protray this.

    neb.
    test
  4. 49th Prophet

    49th Prophet Dark Magic Inferno

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    Imagery was off the hook in this one...
    very well written, Nebulaz took my quotes....
    really nice work

    much love

    peace
    test
  5. eatemup

    eatemup New Member

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    this was a very dope piece liked it
    test
  6. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

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    very nice story....imagery was flawless....I havent seen you around in a good minute. Glad to see you come around

    one luv
    test
  7. allnakey

    allnakey Sex is no fun by yourself

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    strong piece, Nice Job


    stay up, much love, peace
    test
  8. Feme Sole

    Feme Sole Mrs. _Evil

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    this is the second RAW piece ive read in here today and i must say that this is the shit i love to read.......this was beautifully written.....perfect


    peace and blessings
    test
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