Future

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by icedemond666, May 25, 2003.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. icedemond666

    icedemond666 §pilla illest killa

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2001
    Messages:
    336
    Just thinkin'

    hard to find as my words bend your mind

    Seemingly difficult as my verbs are of a stimulating kind

    Its a sign that what i speak is a vortex cyclone

    that i use my pen and paper as a shield and sword

    To hide whats "behind the mask" witch may seem horid

    but in re-ality its just a preposterous illusion

    the blood that runs thru my brain is acid fussion

    I can see thru your rhymes and designs like blind fury

    I dont preach all i do is speak.. to whoever listens

    I'm a new design of poetry

    My version is called floetry
    test
  2. TuNed RooT

    TuNed RooT Love is introduction ..

    Joined:
    May 25, 2003
    Messages:
    869
    "Its a sign that what i speak is a vortex cyclone

    that i use my pen and paper as a shield and sword

    To hide whats "behind the mask" witch may seem horid

    but in re-ality its just a preposterous illusion"


    Nice use of words and nice twist to make them work in what you wanted to say. Feeling the last line tremendously. I thought that this was a better Poem than your last one, which I dropped knowledge on. Other than that, nice simile with the "Blind fury" line, as well as the metaphorical trait within the line of "Pen and paper as a shield and sword" < very smooth. My blessings..
    test
  3. icedemond666

    icedemond666 §pilla illest killa

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2001
    Messages:
    336
    Thanx for the werds =D lol peace
    test
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page

Users Viewing Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 0)