Who believes and practices this statement? Because I don't. My wife says this a lot, but what she really means is, "I have a problem forgiving people because I can't get over the pain that easily, so I need time to think about whether they deserve my forgiveness." I say that if forgiveness is a process, then so is apology. If a transgressor has to wait 2-3 weeks or 2-3 years to be forgiven for a transgression, then the transgressed should expect to wait just as long for an apology. What these people don't realize is that forgiveness frees YOU, not the transgressor. You're only hurting yourself by holding onto that bitterness and anger. You're taking away years from your life and adding wrinkle lines and gray hair. Besides, grudges kill relationships, not the mistakes. Mistakes can be mended and trust can be restored with true remorse expressed by the transgressor and true forgiveness extended by the transgressed. Basically, when a transgression is made, the transgressed has 3 options: 1) Remove the person from his/her life... ie., break up with them 2) Seek revenge 3) Forgive and move on The transgressor has 2 options: 1) Ignore his/her mistake and act like they did no wrong 2) Apologize and make amends When the transgressor has done his/her part, which is option #2, then the transgressed has a responsibility to forgive, IF he/she wants the relationship to continue. If you're a Christian, you're supposed to forgive whether you receive an apology or not, because you have to do that in order to maintain your relationship with Christ. There is nothing in the Bible that says anything remotely similar to "forgiveness is a process" or that you seek revenge or that you wait an indefinite amount of time to forgive. That's just a man-made supposition. If you can't get over the transgression, then you need to end the relationship. It's really that simple. To me, at least. Since I realize that we're all fallible human beings, I don't have that big of a problem with forgiveness. I read an article once that said, "love is something you do, not something you feel." And that sums it up perfectly. For people who only feel love and base all of their actions on feelings, then I can see how forgiveness can be so difficult. However, if you're spiritual, wise and maintain the proper perspective of love and relationships, then forgiveness should be easy. What say you?