~ Eastern Finals ~ Pent Up -vs- Tali Rodriguez

Discussion in 'RSTL Grudge Matches and Tournaments' started by DiC GeTs GuLLy, Feb 14, 2007.

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  1. DiC GeTs GuLLy

    DiC GeTs GuLLy Hello

    Feb 26, 2005



    The Standard League Rules will still be Enforced

    • Check-in (Posting in your match to show that you are aware the match exists) is encouraged but not required.
    • Verses must incorporate at least one of the provided topics and must be at least 16 lines and must not exceed 64 lines.
    • Anyone who does not post at least 4 rap lines, incorporating at least one of the provided topics, is considered a no-show.
    • During check-in, you can ask your opponent to agree to a line limit (Minimum 16) and if your opponent agrees, Moderators will hold both participants to that limit.
    • Posting between 4-15 lines is considered a “show” but will not result in a match. If you post 4-15 lines, and your opponent posts between 16-64, you will lose the match but you will remain in the league. If you post 4-15 lines, and your opponent does not show, you will “Win by no-show”.

    • If you do not show you can’t vote in any matches. .
    • No bias votes! If you have a personal investment in wanting someone to lose, whether because that member voted against you once, or you just don’t like that person, whatever the reason, do not vote in the match. If have a personal investment in wanting someone to win, whether because they’re crew member, or because you want to face that person in the next week’s brackets, whatever the reason, do not vote in the match.
    • ”Bias” must be confirmed by a Moderator.
    • 3-ways are inevitable. In order to provide a tie-breaker in a 3-way, you are now required to indicate in what order the contestants finished (1st, 2nd, 3rd).
      anyone who does not show or vote is suspended one week and must sign-in again to be inserted the following week.

    Topics: http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread.php?t=1033783

    From now on if you don't vote in the tournament and win your match, you will be deducted a vote from your next match for every vote didn't give the previous week. If you show late and your partner allows the extension as long as it’s less than a day late, it can count, but you will be deducted 2 votes for showing late regardless.

    These rules will be put in effect starting now and won’t be modified again. I’m not bending or breaking anymore rules for anybody.

    Must READ: You must pick one of each topic to give your opponent some protection from choices and also so there isn't several verses written on the same topic that everyone has picked to be used.

    So pick one of the Title and Phrases, one of the Quotes and one of the Pics for your opponent.

    Thursday is the deadline for choosing topics or your opponent will get to pick their own topic. Topical choices must be posted in match threads by deadline.

    All other rules that are applied in the league will also be enforced for regulating the tournament. If you're not familiar with the rules of the RSTL, please read them.

    The only difference will be that in this tournament, your opponent will get to pick your topics for you. Topics must be picked and posted within the match thread within 1 day. If it's not posted, the opponent of the person that didn't pick a topic in time will get to choose his/her own topic. You must choose one of each kind of topic for some variety.

    So... topics will be up Wednesday 12am PST every week and topical choices are due Thursday 12am PST and verses are due Monday 12am PST, 3am EST, 8am Greenwich with votes due Wednesday 12 am PST, 3am EST, 8am Greenwich

    Also, there will be no recycling allowed. Nothing you've ever posted anywhere online will be allowed. The mods will be checking verses for authenticity with online search engines.

  2. TaLi RodrigueZ

    TaLi RodrigueZ Washed Up Rapper...

    Apr 5, 2002

    No problem...


    After the fact

    Laws are silent in times of war.

  3. ConstantFlows

    ConstantFlows New Member

    Nov 10, 2001

    Been busy all day, sorry couldn't get'em to u sooner
  4. TaLi RodrigueZ

    TaLi RodrigueZ Washed Up Rapper...

    Apr 5, 2002

    Atlanta, Georgia

    Toward the end of 1978, rape was the crime committed
    The jury deliberated, and soon, I was convicted
    Hit with 44 long years in a fed prison, my mother and wife
    Shuddered and cried, none of us envisioned
    The future that laid ahead of me, my infant son would never get
    To wrestle me, my spouse would never get to rest in bed with me
    The veteran team of lawyers did their best in defending me
    But in the end they couldn’t beat the evidence presented

    So I found myself embedded in an eight by ten dungeon
    With a bunk bed on the right and off to the left, a pungent
    Half-ass toilet that flushed when it chose, a faucet that leaked
    And a flickering light above in case I wanted to read
    All I could see was four walls of frozen chipped concrete
    With an iron door, no window to the outside, shit taught me
    To visualize things other than the beast I was trapped in
    Anything to ease the monotony and keep me from snappin’

    I pretty much managed to get past the first year of imprisonment
    Thanks to the fact that my family visited weekly
    All I could hope was that I could convince them that I was innocent
    So they wouldn’t think that I was totally wicked and leave me

    Cold showers and meals fit for a dog were daily occasions
    I felt angry and lazy; but still, it was mainly impatience
    That started making me crazy; I was in control of nothing
    And before I knew it, my wife and son only showed up monthly
    I knew something was wrong when my mom rolled up in tears
    With some papers, by this time, I had been holed up for years
    In a voice as sweet nectar but weathered from loads of crying
    She said that my wife was leaving me; there was no denying
    That I let her down, I never got the sense that she believed me
    When I told her of my blamelessness, still, I was completely
    Devastated, but I signed all of the papers without hesitation
    After I was sentenced I had very little expectation
    That they’d stay as long as they did, I was thankful for that
    But I never wanted my son to have to feel shameful of dad

    My 12th year rolled around, it had been 6 since I’d seen them
    The last I heard, she had met some man and moved up to Cleveland
    Mom passed during the eighth year and my visitations ceased
    All I knew beyond these walls was bits of information reaped

    From the cellmates that I had, every so often they’d switch it
    Some were young, some were old, some were bold, some were bitches
    But each taught me lessons about surviving the slammer
    Most were more or less detached but one was highly enamored
    With my case, twenty-some years in, I evaded those statements
    Cause’ the penitentiary was no safe place for a rapist
    Plus, even if I denied it, I knew that no one would buy it
    But he kept on trying anyway, so one day I decided
    To confide in him, I told him how my wife and I were fighting
    To avoid incident, I got the car and started driving
    Around town, anywhere but in that house was fine with me
    Little did I know, that some girl was being raped violently
    When I stopped at Arby’s to get some shit in my system
    The police picked me up and said that I fit the description
    The rest is history; the man told me how he lost his daughter
    After he’d gotten busted for vehicular manslaughter
    That he was in law school before he succumbed to this bane
    And said he had a friend who could help if I truly wasn’t to blame

    Toward the end of 2006, a judge granted my release
    Said the state was sorry and they'd get me planted on my feet
    All the while, they came off with a hint of pompousness
    Still they did continue to help me after the press conferences
    Too bad they didn't test for DNA back when my trial was up
    Maybe I'd still be with my ex, helping my child and stuff
    I'm getting back into the swing, only good to come, hopefully
    But nothing will erase the 28 years of freedom they stole from me

  5. Pent uP

    Pent uP I'd Like to Fight Ten Men

    Feb 17, 2001
    Laws are silent in times of war.

  6. DiC GeTs GuLLy

    DiC GeTs GuLLy Hello

    Feb 26, 2005
    Pent's Verse - having issues with his internet and his verse wouldn't post.

    Laws are silent in times of war.

    I’m privileged in war, impatient with lives that live to be scorned
    A general, born to take advantage of this system to score
    If needed additional force is given of course
    The rules are changed to shoot through brains with my permission and force
    Civilians to mourn, but my concern is on winning the fights
    I wish I could light up a nuclear missle in flight and end all their lives
    In a state of mass confusion, you may wonder my principals
    But my actions are for the freedoms of every US individual

    I pledge allegiance to the flag, the same as my father
    And my father before him so we’re the Navy’s armor
    Protecting the people, hectic and lethal, the dirtiest jobs
    While you watch TV and smoke refer, we service the probs
    People chose to hate what truly can’t understand
    Like the things at Guantanamo Bay and Iran
    These are sensitive matter that have my attention
    But I need you to stop trippin about my battle missions
    Everyone can’t be given the same set of right
    We have to torture fathers and sons til they say what I like
    Information needs to be leaked so if they have to leak first
    Then that’s what has to happen cuz their reactions are worst
    They’re willing to kill themselves just to kill some of us
    Do you truly understand that kind of commitment to love?

    so while the president worries about all you sensitive fucks
    Me and my men are living rough just to finish this stuff
    So please spare the hippy drag of you burning our flag
    In their country you don’t have the right to emerge as a fag
    Don’t you like the life you have and the rights to be dumb
    To lay on your fuckin ass and live your life as a bum?
    Who the hell you think supplies you that kind of security
    I’ll tell you who, it’s me and my choice to fight the impurities
    Give some credit where it’s due and show some love to your troops
    Because they’re the men and women giving their blood for your dues
    Huddled in groups without a toilet and sometimes not much food
    So when they come home, take off your clothes and make love to them too
    If you need someone to blame for them becoming insane
    Then just point the finger at me and put a gun to your brain
    If that’s your course of thoughts, you don’t deserve to think
    I still serve God, he created me to burn this beef
    And now that we’re in a crucial state of emergency
    I have to give my knowledge of murder so you’ll learn from me
    Rules are broken, truths aren’t spoken as we protect what’s left
    I’m stressing your lives so you need to stop stressing deaths
    Some people have to die in the process, but that’s done with honor
    To keep the safety you hold dearly for your sons and fathers
    Label me evil if you want, it doesn’t stop my duties
    Of killing everything in my view with a hostile cruelty
    There’s a purpose that’s more valuable than the lives you’re viewing
    Being taken and if I seem like Satan, stop watching movies
    I’m an angel here to kill the demons feared on the planet
    So next time you judge me, imagine if I wasn’t here to do damage
    All you envision is the horrible tasks I do for this cause
    Without understanding that war is what I do for my job

  7. SacriFICE

    SacriFICE TRUspeak

    Jul 13, 1999
    Tali: Damn man, very very well written story... Even though you seemed to have dumbed down your rhyming a BIT, it's still more efficient and well done as anything the league has to offer. No awkwardness, flow was excellent. Just a really well written descriptive story. Plus the actual story... crazy that this kind of shit happens... Not too much more I can say about this, very well done.

    Pent: Cool piece here... the topic was solid man, and the message was cool, and I agree very much so with what you're saying. The rhyming was very good in a few places and a little awkward in some cases. I felt the piece man, good enough to take out a lot of writers in the league right now.

    Where this match kind of takes it's turn from two solid pieces is the writing skill. Tali is, I'm afraid, at least from these two pieces, the better writer, with the much better written piece. Tali's piece was just completely solid all the way throughout, and this ultimately comes down to weaknesses, because you both are good writers. I don't feel Tali's piece had ANY weaknesses at all, where Pent's had a quite a few things that kind of turned me off to this piece. Pent, don't get me wrong man, a lot of your piece was dope. Tali was just on another level this time.

    VOTE: Tali...

    good match up guys.
  8. Camarac

    Camarac A Beautiful Flow

    Nov 2, 2002
    OoOoOoh - I didnt realise this was up.

    TaLi - I disagree with Sac on the whole 'sumbing down' of your rhyming. I actually like it like that, it was a fresh take in a league that seems to have gone mechanics crazy opf late. Lol. And you seemed to say so much more without the need of too many multies and such, so I actually preffered this simpler approach more than I thought I would. I too thought the flow was pretty sick to this, it reads smooth as butter right the way through my man, great transitions, and what a way to open it up! Ha! The suspense was killing me for a while as I read it. I cant say the ending threw me, I was a expecting a sudden twist at the end which never came, but regardless - This was phenominally well written. Wording was on point and you really got your writers voice on in this. Kinda a no-frills approach to the whole thing and I loved that. Well done.

    Pent - Well, this was almsot the opposite of TaLi's in a lot of respects. The first being the ••••••••••, you mixed up the mechanics to it real good, the scheme and wording were on point the whole way through, and while the topic and take you pulled off were good, I couldnt help but feel I wanted more. I couldnt help feeling that this type of idea has been approached before, and its true with a lot of topics like this that unless you have afresh take, or a new twist on it, then it wont get the props it deserves. This piece deserves every ounce of credit it gets, it was up there with the best in the league right now, BUT!

    I couldnt help but come away feeling TaLi took this man. Madd respect to both cats.

    Vote - TaLi
  9. Bull Dog

    Bull Dog ThaBulldog

    Jan 14, 2007
    Tali Rodriguez
    This was dope all over man... You showed you didn't need multis or constant rhymes to make a dope topical... And you did actually have a good flow because I was flowing & singing throughout you're verse... Mad props my dude.. Imagery was cool, & the topic was nice, & you let the topic out very well, And props on that.. It seems like you spent a lot of time on this, but I must agree with camarac on this.. You could have had a much better ending to make this peice perfect... If you did that I would give you a 10/10, but for now 9.5/10... Dope drop homie & I'm looking forward to peeping more of you verses... Stay Up...

    Pent Up
    Very nice drop as well... You had great multis, rhyme scheme and flow all throughout you're verse...But at times I had to pause, but thats okay.. I feel the topic you was trying to bring out, and you could have let it out a little better... Maybe planning it out? But I still like the message.... Don’t you like the life you have and the rights to be dumb...To lay on your fuckin ass and live your life as a bum? - I feel this all the way... Nice job homie & I enjoyed reading this a lot... This was a great verse but tali rodriguez just came perfect... I'm looking forward to reading more of you're drops & Tali Rod's.. Stay Up...

    Overall this was a very good battle, I'm pretty sure if Pent Up battle anyone else in this leage with that verse this week, he would have won... Dope drop both of you & I will be looking forward to peeping more of it... Stay Up & Stay in this league....

    Vote - Tali Rodriguez
  10. Kryptikal

    Kryptikal Soulstice.

    Aug 26, 2005
    tali - holy fucking shit, this story was beautifully written, the flow started off hard to catch on to, but once ig to it it was fluidily perfect, there ere about 2 or 3 very small syllable matching problems in the verse, and the story was just dope, it had no twist or anything, but you crafted it so well, and the i felt for the character thanks to the sorrow he felt for his son.... excellent job,

    pen tup -
    well excellent verse as well, but i think tali is gonna take it this time, you had some more multies and inners but i paused and stumbled more times at your verse then i did at tali;s , the topic you used needed a creative mind to fit into our verse, but i can see were you were going with it.. felling some of your metaphors, but overall tali had great flow and story so my

    vote goes to tali rodriquez
  11. DiC GeTs GuLLy

    DiC GeTs GuLLy Hello

    Feb 26, 2005
    Tali, nicely done. the content was well developed and the story was nicely executed. The flow had a unique scheme and the read was somewhat smooth with some awkward moments, but nice overall. The prison concept was eehh and there didn't really seem like much emotions in the narration... people in prison aren't allowed to be emotional bitch though, it was pretty enjoyable.

    Pent, this was nicely done man. The content flowed smoothly and I liked you taking an adverse point of view instead of the overly done view of why the war is wrong and saying why it's needed. The use of both topics seemed nice too and your flow was pretty strong for the most part. A few places had some long lines, but it was still easy to follow. Nice job man. Proud that you made it this far and you're on the plaque ninja

    Vote Tali
  12. Bull Dog

    Bull Dog ThaBulldog

    Jan 14, 2007
    Edited by me, Tali

    Reason, Could be construed as swaying..
  13. FórmÅl LôGíc

    FórmÅl LôGíc Black Listed

    Apr 3, 2001
    Tali - I love your rhyme scheme. Its real unique, but it works really well. Through you flow, rhyme scheme, and writers voice you let the reader see everything smoothly. Story was good, not necessarily overly original, but good none-the-less. Imagery was solid, you were creative in describing the man's life in and out of the cell. The story moved along really well, and you defiantly painted a great character. Mechanics were solid as always. If there's one thing Id have to criticize, it'd be the end, it came a bit abruptly and it didnt live up to the great writing before it.

    Pent - Very nice verse. It had a very real prose, and very real message. You managed to say, what every conservative person wants to say, and what every liberal deep down thinks, that being we dont hate a religion or culture, we dont like their character and extreme views. Your flow was good, writes voice allowed for a pretty smooth read, but the one thing I feel hinders you in terms of voting is Tali's whole scheme is so flawless it makes anything he writes look good and it overshadows a verse like yours, with so much emotion and thought.

    Its tough to decide these types of battles. Where one person has such a solid, flawless scheme but an average to above average story, and the other has this great topical approach, with so much to say, with so much emotion, but an average scheme. In the end I have to go with Pent, just because his verse was so strong and in my eyes moving.

    Vote - Pent Up
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