child discipline

Discussion in 'Ladies Lounge' started by Shit with corn in it IRM'S BITCH, May 31, 2005.

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  1. here's one that comes up every once in awhile:

    Do you think its ok/beneficial to give your child a smack, slap, tap? or does this just have a detrimental effect on the child?

    As a kid I got smacked occasionally and I don't really look back and see it as something that was out of order. In my personal experience with children I have found that reasoning with the child is the best method if he/she is mature enough. I think you have to be consistent and use all the methods at your disposal in moderation. If you are a person with short patience and shout and shout, it doesn't work and the child builds up a quick immunity to this so when you really do need to get the child's attention, shouting isn't enough. On the other hand, if you try and be as patient with your child as possible and persuasive with it, raising your voice rarely but authoritively works best.

    So what about hitting? I think hitting should always be the last resort and then it depends on the circumstance. I don't think excessive physical discipline helps matters at all and is likely to cause some psychological problems along with resentment for the parent. I think that If the child can grow up to appreciate why the parent physically disciplined them and can see by their own reasoning that it was perhaps for their own good then I am inclined to believe that the parent did right by the child. I think physical discipline can be done responsibly and irresponsibly. responsibly is with the childs' best interests at heart moderated and balanced according to the age/maturity of the child and situation. Irresponsible is punishment without any thought in sight to better the child in the long run or have them learn some kind of value from the discipline. Therfore you shouldn't let correction turn into cruelty. If you do, you crossed the line.
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  2. Gotti23

    Gotti23 Come 2 the darkness

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    I don't think it's ok to smack a kid I think it's better just to punch them so they toughen up and become school yard bullies.
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  3. Hidden_Poetry

    Hidden_Poetry New Member

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    My boys are soon to be 6 and just turned 3. They are still to young to actually use a "smacking" method as a last resort. However I do have a short fuse and I will tap them if it comes down to it. But RARELY does it come down to that. They are good with just a time out in their bedroom. That works best in this house. :eek:)

    I was hit as a child and I can say because of it I made sure I didn't repeat that with my children.
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  4. Short2003

    Short2003 AbsoluteHotness

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    I got spanked every once in awhile when I was a kid and it had no life-long effect on me or my sister so I chose it as a form of discipline but only as a last resort.. Most of the time smacking the spoon on the counter is enough but not all the time so he gets a spank on his ass and sent back to his room when he's misbehaving.. Honestly I feel really bad after but I know it has to be done...
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  5. PimpetteRah!

    PimpetteRah! ehrjwhrwejkhr!

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    Damn its like you read my mind!
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  6. LaDy

    LaDy *Divalicous*

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    I don't think there is anything wrong with giving your child a spanking or showing discipline to help your child develop good behavior. Spanking & Disciplining your child does not mean that you are abusing or beating your child. In todays society children lack the proper discipline, respect, and loving fear for their parents. Talking to kids and saying stop is useless if you haven't shown them the consequences of their actions. Children learn through reinforcement. I feel that parents should be given the right to discipline their children.

    Now what I don't condone is beating your children and giving excessive woopings and abuse. This is totally different from a spanking. I feel that parents should be able to give there child taps on the hand and on the backside to discipline their kids when they are acting out of hand. Kids today are so bad because parents are afraid to properly discipline their children for fear that they may tap their childrens on the hand and be labeled and unfit parent, and bussed to jail. That's why we got these bad little demons who bring guns to school, bully, act out of control because the govement has taken the parents right to discipline.
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  7. H20_Dirty

    H20_Dirty New Member

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    spanking is stupid i will elaborate later but I'll say this I got woopings all my young life and I still did what the fuck i wanted and it put no fear in me so what's the point now I see my younger cousins see it as the same way............your kids are going to learn from expierence not justs dont do it cause u said so
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  8. LaDy

    LaDy *Divalicous*

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    Spanking is only stupid if a child is spanked and the parent does not "explain" to the child why they were spanked.

    Well if you know the nature of human beings, you know that it is in our nature to rebel, that is a given. But, Children who are properly disciplined tend to be better behaved, and there always lie the possibility that they may "rebel". Rebellion is a thing that children and teenagers go through. There are also some kids that are just bad period whether they are disciplined or not. Oh and as far as children not getting woopens, alot of those kids are bad as H*ll. Talking does nothing for them. So what is it you suppose a parent do, cause talking does not work. They will just look at you and do whatever they want.

    But the way children respond to discipline from parents also depends on the family structure- meaning whether the parents are married, single parent families, family disfunction, and the level of neglect, or attention. Children who lack fathers or have weak fathers tend to have behavioral problems disciplined or not.
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  9. kingjafaar

    kingjafaar New Member

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    Smacking can have a profound effect on a person's life. I know from personal experience, that the discipline that my mother gave me when I was young ensured I didn't become no trouble making mothafucka who didn't care about education etc etc. Everyone who I know that got beat as a kid turned out on the straight and narrow. I don't mean beating as in, everyday the kid gets a fist in the jaw for no reason, but when the kid steps REALLY out of line, throwing tantrums in public etc, some physical discipline is needed.

    You people complaining about 'smacking' etc are the reason why your kids will be tearaways.
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  10. kingjafaar

    kingjafaar New Member

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    Nail on the head.



    Aaaah, I remember the days I used to get a slipper launched from across the room after doing bad shit in nursery.
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  11. MiSt_Of_CoNfUsIoN

    MiSt_Of_CoNfUsIoN Ray of Sunshine

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    I spank my neice and nephew.. I will do the same with my own children.
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  12. I don't think I would feel comfortable physically disciplining my neices, I don't feel its my place to do that, instead I just raise my voice on occasion. I think its a delicate situation because parents can easily become offended when people step in and take the responsibilty for discipline. Even if it is agreed that everyone has the right to discipline, there is always going to be more and less severe spankings etc and this can cause problems.
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  13. H20_Dirty

    H20_Dirty New Member

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    Being spanked has no scientific results that it makes u less prone to get into trouble it's all about your mindset...........like i said some stupid ass remedy...........kinda like havin kids to be slaves i'd say because when us blacks were slaves the whippings were to keep us in check........same difference there's no curve or favortism towards disiplining your kids it's the same fuckin thing your tryin to instill fear..........and i'm living prof that shit dont work........people as a whole are goin to do what the fuck they want..........period whipping or not............people learn from expierence that'll instill the fear itself and that dont gotta do wit whippings..........if tell a little kid that can comprehend then when u tell em verbally not to do sumin then they understand if they do it then get hurt they'll chalk it up to expierence next time they'll listen...........
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  14. Hidden_Poetry

    Hidden_Poetry New Member

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    I couldn't agree more. Everyone around me knows NOT to discipline my children. Of course, if they were way outta line and what not, then I'd expect someone to give them a time out or something along the lines. But someone else (family or not) will not hit my boys. I don't even do it, I don't think I'd allow someone else to lol.

    But the way I see it, is if my child is acting out, and I'm there. Tell me. Don't yell at my child. If I'm sitting there and doing shit about it, then you can say something to them.

    See, I have a friend who's son is just TERRIBLE. He dosen't listen for shit at all (He's 4). It's like, she'll yell (yes she only yells) at him and shit. but she's gotten to the point where she doesn't care any more and he just does whatever. Well, at my home he's not allowed to do just whatever. If his mother is sitting there and not doing a damn thing when her child is acting in a behaviour that isn't tolorated in my home, then yeah, I will kindly ask him to behave. If he doesn't, then yeah I get stern with him. She hasn't told me not to, she doesn't do it herself. So in that type of situation I feel it's alright. But not to hit another person's child.
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  15. skandelous_lala

    skandelous_lala back from the dead

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    I agree with the things that Lady said.

    I won't be afraid to spank my kids if they are really acting up. I don't think you should spank a kid to physically hurt them. I remember the worst spanking I ever got and my mom did it and I cried and cried..not b/c it hurt me physically but b/c my feelings were hurt lol It was such a RARE thing for it to happen but she told me why what I did was wrong and believe me I never did it again.

    There's a big difference between disciplining your child and just being abusive towards them.

    Kids run wild these days..I think something is certainly missing in the realms of how people are raising them and disciplining them...not necessarily just giving them a good beating every once in a while either lol
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  16. urban_tactics

    urban_tactics aka johnny cockram

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    WHOOP they ass....it teaches them respect........

    i came out just fine.....

    sorry to say....but these lil children, runnin up in schools, shootin shit up.....or killin they own parents...is a resort of horrible discipline

    its SIMPLE physcology......children are born with only primitive problem solving techniques....their logical thinking hasnt quite developed....so u have to teach them the illogical way...by effecting their emotions........ action + pain = dont do it again

    its too simple.....
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  17. justachick

    justachick New Member

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    oOOOoOo spank me Urb..................hmmmmmmmmm now that would be interesting...lol
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  18. IF@KINGHATEU

    IF@KINGHATEU i h8 u

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    is it ok if your dad punches you and your mom uses hangers.. cause thats how they use to beat me, but when I was in a crib my dad use to hit me with the news paper once when i was like two he through me against a door it was crazy but now i could beat him up i fight him all the time hes a pussy now i own him
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  19. urban_tactics

    urban_tactics aka johnny cockram

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    just wait til i get there....talk to u tonight...lol
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  20. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

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    I havent spanked my little girl yet, she'll be turning five in August. She really don't be doing anything bad though. But when she does and needs to be popped I always punk out for some reason. Her mother be whooping that ass though. So usually when she does something bad I'll just say, "i'ma tell your mama" and she'll calm her happy ass down.

    Yeah but I dont see nothing wrong with an ass whipping. I got a plenty of them when I was coming up and I came out just fine. Literally.

    -walks out
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