Breathe In Breathe Out

Discussion in 'Post Ya Audios & Videos Here! - feedback forum' started by D M H, Jun 29, 2005.

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  1. D M H

    D M H The G.O.D.

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2005
    Messages:
    85
    It's called 'Breathe In Breathe Out,' I used Kanye West's beat for the track. It's 3:14 long. Tell me what you think, the link is below:

    Breathe In Breathe Out

    Leave feed either in here or on my message board on soundclick. The lyrics are on soundclick also.

    Peace ::cool::
    test
  2. Taiyamo Denku

    Taiyamo Denku W.A.S.T.E.L.A.N.D.S.

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2000
    Messages:
    9,756
    Your sound quality is very bad, that hissing sound in ya vocals makes me almost not want to listen. Your flow is real simple, sounds like you reading right off the paper. The delivery is not real stand out either, no real good mic presence. The lyrics are kinda weak. madd simple, no real creativity. This sounds very amature. it is coo if you doing this for a hobby, but you need to elevate your skills if you want to take this serious. Just keeping it real with you.

    Overall this needs alot of work. mixing is very bad. like I said alot of work is needed. there is potential there but got along way to go.

    peep my newest track plz..

    Ohh and the chorus is very very bad, double the chorus it would stand out more. Plus it is very simple and weak.

    peep this plz

    http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread.php?t=902814
    test
  3. D M H

    D M H The G.O.D.

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2005
    Messages:
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    Just a hobby....and yes I do realize my mic sucks ass and I wish I could get rid of that annoying hissing sound in the background. Amature??....more like Beginner. This is only my 3rd audio and I'm still tryin to find my style with it. Thanks for the honest feed though, it helps me when I write my next song.

    I'll peep your track in a little bit.

    Peace
    test
  4. D M H

    D M H The G.O.D.

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2005
    Messages:
    85
    Still Uppin...
    test
  5. D M H

    D M H The G.O.D.

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2005
    Messages:
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    To be real honest..I don't even like this track anymore..uppin
    test
  6. kyILL

    kyILL Mister ILL

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2005
    Messages:
    166

    my thoughts as well.. keep working at it though.. don't try to take a hobby and make it anything more than a hobby though.. my advice..
    test
  7. D M H

    D M H The G.O.D.

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2005
    Messages:
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    ^Yep, uppin...
    test
  8. NoxOnline

    NoxOnline Producer/Rapper

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    60
    Your quality is off, too much hissin' and shit....your delivery needs work. Put a little bit of emotion into it, you're a little monotone. You don't have much prescence. Calling yourself King ...is somewhat ludacris.. You're off beat on your hook....Your lyrics are really basic...Definitely need to up your game. I would try maybe taking a long time to write stuff, think about wordplay and metaphors instead of just putting anything down..and memorize what you write, and then get on the mic with emotion. keep tryin', you'll get there eventually.

    Check mines - http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread.php?t=915204
    test
  9. D M H

    D M H The G.O.D.

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2005
    Messages:
    85
    ^Thanks for feed..uppin....

    Damn...#65 on new school charts and #670 overall on hip hop, that's the highest my shits ever been on soundclick...and even I think this song could've been better.
    test
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