best punchlines of all time...

Discussion in 'Battle Video Archives' started by lpsmind, Jan 7, 2009.

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  1. Sensei Sounds

    Sensei Sounds Certified Brappee

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    But you can't beat me with them Ronald McDonald boots.

    You gotta do the full quote for the maximum comedy [funny]. Especially since it was right after Rheteric was like "WHAT THE FUCK DID CUM DO A FACE OF A FIVE YEAR OLD?!"

    "...it made him a tacky geek...with a fuckin' bloated belly and scabby cheeks.
    You look like a decomposing body on the Iraqi streets...
    After a tank parade and an apache sweep.
    You need stem cell treatment, fuck acne cream. "
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  2. Amishstad

    Amishstad New Member

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    oh yea..
    sorry man, stoner memory.
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  3. Amishstad

    Amishstad New Member

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    y'all cannon ball running with the burt reynolds mustashce
    marv to illmac

    and all those acne jokes you thought were sick as hell apply to him as well
    you look like chritian bale, with sickle cell who's freakin frail and survived the bombin of the british rail.
    the saurus to possessed

    i hope i got that one right


    and what ever dizaster said about just some faggots on a couch eating grapes was classic
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  4. Credintials

    Credintials IRS can suck my books

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    As dope and on point as that line was, I attribute that single moment in hip hop for the influx of the modern horrible multi-syllabic battle "rapper". After that 10,000 fratboys with webcams became "battlers" overnight trying to base a whole style off of one pattern.
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  5. mapleleaf

    mapleleaf bumpin onyx in the jag

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    you look like you had a seizure in art class- critical to piff james
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  6. Drect

    Drect Elite Battling Association CEO

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    thats the punchline that made me want to rap. Also:

    Illmac's "eddie g tekken 3" to parable
    Illmac's "macy gray shave wit razor blade" to swann
    Swann " u so wack u could battle 3 people and still come in 5th" lmaoooo

    Mook's line about Jordan vs AI

    Serius Jones whole battle vs Jin

    Jin's "game recognize game"

    Eyetel "ur head look like a double scoop on a ice cream cone" lmaooo
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  7. mapleleaf

    mapleleaf bumpin onyx in the jag

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    I'll jam move and slump ya
    Leave your body in ranch cuckamonga with ants moving under

    Forget holla for help
    I make you wanna pull ya lip over ya head and just swallow ya self
    Ya not on my level, not on my shelf
    But you can and you will be just another notch on my belt

    juelz santana baby
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  8. mapleleaf

    mapleleaf bumpin onyx in the jag

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    yeah that Mook jordan/ai shit was the best
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  9. Lush One

    Lush One MR. CALIFORNIA

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    Run you ovah like a buuuus

    takes the proverbial cake you hoez
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  10. Everybody Knows

    Everybody Knows piss in tha basket

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    haha wow!
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  11. ICE8102

    ICE8102 New Member

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    ...he looks like the kool-aid man in grape flavor-
    saurus to marv

    how you gonna make your weight decrease, all you eats steaks and keish, eggs and cheese, and milkshakes of bacon grease
    illmac to kodyack

    face homeboy yo health is fucked, looks like your bellybuttons bought to self destruct
    swann to deuce leader
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  12. EmceeGoddess

    EmceeGoddess Disgruntled Man

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    i credit this line for creating the downfall of battles
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  13. DDDDD

    DDDDD AKA ENLISH

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    haha, yeah mang, they were the days. those old audio battles were jokes. was it scribe tribe? the text mcs who didnt have the balls to record audio? haha

    yeah im working on getting my album out, got the usual suspects, stig, syntax, sonnyjim, got a verse from sean p on there and also hines and clev cleverly....remember them? we're all still on it.

    and eurgh is getting me back into battling again, the rusty cogs still whir a bit. i got a couple joints at myspace.com/enlish and theres audio of a recent battle at Slip Jam:B on MySpace Music - Free Streaming MP3s, Pictures & Music Downloads

    i heard scribble was cancelled this year? was going to trip out with some of the boys, sucks if so

    anyways holla 1

    oh good punchlines = anything by presence
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  14. Amishstad

    Amishstad New Member

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    ..nobody can budge Rise,
    I was hit by a bus.. ten people on that bus died

    your girl will bend backwards for you but forewards for me

    -Rise - The Wickedest Flow


    i dont care if thats battle shit or not. they're fuckin dope
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  15. Gwame

    Gwame no luckycharms in ireland

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    piff james is funny as hell.

    "yo whole style dirty rotten like puerto-rican store apples"
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  16. jayoo

    jayoo new york representative

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    yooooooo rise is fuckin SICK... that whole song is CRAZY

    "rise, my indian name is touchs ya girl"

    "writin is tough ya friends likin my stuff
    now after hearin me rhyme they wont like you as much"

    "hate when wack rappers say they hate wack rappers"

    "if i hear one more rapper thats as sick as the flu
    i cant be held accountable for the shit ima do"

    "keep kickin the lamest raps where you blazin tracks
    but at shows, only the cats that you came with clap"


    oh an yo when mad illz said to marvwon somethin like "if you joined bone thugs an harmony your name would be thigh bone" LOL that bodied me
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  17. deezenutsbiatch

    deezenutsbiatch New Member

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    is that the same rise as the "your on my fuck you list with checks next to your name"

    "in this rap game iam nobody(why?)nobody's perfect"

    "if i get all mad and pissed, you couldnt be saved if cops came with formatted disks"

    if so, i been lookin for albums from that dude for a minute with no luck. anybody know where i can find some more of his shit?
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  18. jayoo

    jayoo new york representative

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    im bout to hit up classes till later in the day but i got a best of rise album i think i can find the link to or re-upload, dude is nasty
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  19. Ayod2k6

    Ayod2k6 New Member

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    "look at your team givin me the hawk all crazy .. tellem stop the stares or get popped all crazy... " - reed dollaz

    (tongue snap) " I swear this big nigga apple jacks!" - hollow da don

    lol
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  20. deezenutsbiatch

    deezenutsbiatch New Member

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    sounds good, let me know
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