Bad Deeds

Discussion in 'Open Mic' started by Tacky Jones, Nov 6, 2013.

  1. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones www.TaCsmassivecock.gov

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2008
    Messages:
    76,201
    No bad deed goes unpunished
    Like no bad headline goes unpublished
    Sometimes karmas too much to stomach
    You can sing along or you can hum it



    Driving home from work late one night
    Super bowl at Buffalo Wild Wings, sounds fun, right?
    Still sweating, exhausted, a beer is necessary
    Got the AC cranked in my truck in mid February
    Take the Alcosta ramp and swing a right on SRV
    two miles from home, two miles and then I’m free
    Two miles…red light
    A suburban turns in the intersection, a red type
    30 seconds then the light turns green and I go
    Fuck a beer, tonight I need like 4
    Half a mile down I see the suburban with their hazards
    A woman standing outside, when I get a good look at her
    Shes flagging me down, but I left her hooking
    Admittedly I prolly woulda stopped if she was better looking
    But fugs get no love and I’m ready to catch some Z’s
    Looking in my rear view, shes got a look like she cant believe
    As a light mist starts falling, that bitch better start crawling
    Or start calling AAA, I don’t care as I start hauling
    Turn right, stop sign, 2 lefts and I’m home
    Turn on Sportscenter with a Stella and I’m in my zone
    Whatta fuckin night, I close my eyes
    And start having this dream of where my soul might lie
    I see her face, tears rolling down her cheek
    I get up off the couch, kneel by my bed, “Now I lay me down to sleep”
    Laying down I found this dream surrounding me
    Her frowning round physique, these thoughts keep on hounding me
    I’m drowning, see her holding me down an clowning me
    Tied down to the ground, shes wearing a gown at sea
    Am I being baptized, is she making me no longer a bad guy
    I scream, “I swear I would have stopped if I had time”
    Time? I had nothing but but I’m so damn lazy
    Maybe she was an angel and this is a song from Brad Paisley
    All of a sudden she lets go and slowly starts to ascend
    Up to heaven, was she heaven sent and then…the end
    I wake up to birds chirping and sun on my face
    8 am, I jump up, I need coffee no time to waste
    Grandma riding her exercise bike watching the news
    and what happened next you’d say could not be the truth
    “Breaking news from San Ramon we have an update
    On the kidnapping we told you about late last night on Sunday
    The stolen red suburban has been found at Point Richmond
    With a young woman’s body but the suspect is missin’
    Another victim is believed to still be with him
    And connected to a carjacking in Berkeley, Mexico is the prediction
    Of where they’re headed, and this just in
    We believe this missing victims name is…”
    The name was so familiar, the last same as mine
    Grandma sobbing, knowing now I’ve paid the price
    It was my sister, falling to my knees, my head is hurtin
    As I put it together, her friend just bought a red suburban
    She got it yesterday, and they thought they were cooler so
    They went to go bowling instead of watch the super bowl
    How could I be so dumb, how could I be so cold
    How could I be such an asshole, how could I be so bold
    To leave someone in the cold off looks
    Now she’s dead and my sister got took
    Shook to the core, cant get my foot on the floor
    Cuz I cant get off my knees like Snook from the shore
    Staring at the tv but not watching, hours pass
    But I feel so stuck in the moment, I don’t notice how the cast
    Of the view came and replaced the news
    With this on my conscience, how do I face the mus-ic
    Just then the news is cutting back in, “Breaking
    We have the latest update on the kidnapping, this is heart breaking
    Lets just go to our correspondent at the border of Mexico
    Where theres a plice standoff, Jess, hello”
    “Yes, for the last 15 minutes police have had the car surrounded
    With the suspect locked up not coming out like he’s grounded
    And I just heard word in LA a victim has been found dead
    But right now those reports are still confounded
    As the gunman claims to have a hostage
    Along with a bomb in a pressure cooker straight out of Boston”
    All of a sudden the driver door opens and he climbs out
    With a female by his side and a 9 about
    2 inches from her ear, he yells but I cant hear
    He pulls her in front of him, she’s damn near
    A human shield “Anyone moves and she’s dead
    I have something to say and these words need to be said
    Bring the camera close because I know you’re watching
    Ronnie, im that guy you see at 711, you just watch me
    As I starve, begging, putting my pride aside
    As you wont make eye contact, you just try to hide
    Well now whos begging, whos in the position of power
    And I fully intend to kill this bitch in an hour
    If you aren’t here, hope your car can fly
    500 miles an hour, I know you cant drive
    Here in that time, hahaha, revenge is mine
    Nah, I’m just fuckin with you, I intend to find
    a way to toruture you more, taunin’ teasin’
    Cuz I’ve got what you want and I got this reason
    to make you suffer, and I’ve got this platform
    I took enough from you and I cant stand more”
    He clicks his hammer
    As his gat blasts, brains paint the camera
    That mental imagine in my thoughts forever
    And what happened next I cannot remember
    I don’t remember the rest of the day, tomorrow or next week
    Hell, I don’t even remember when I would next speak
    The planning passed, the memorial and funeral too
    Driving home from the burial, still don’t know what to do
    I lost my best friend, along with my armor
    No longer bullet proof, no protection from karma
    Swing a right on SRV, where I see a cars hazards
    And a woman outsider her car, I look at her…



    To be continued
    Last edited: Nov 6, 2013
    • +Rep +Rep x 3
    • Hot Thread Hot Thread x 2
    test
  2. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones www.TaCsmassivecock.gov

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2008
    Messages:
    76,201
    test
  3. mr.redeyez

    mr.redeyez Member

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2007
    Messages:
    932
    Probably one of the best open mics I read in awhile, good story telling from beginning to end, had my attention I was hopin it kept goin lol but yeah come out with a part 2 be easy my dude and keep spitting that real hiphop.
    • +Rep +Rep x 1
    test
  4. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones www.TaCsmassivecock.gov

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2008
    Messages:
    76,201
    thanks for reading, my dude.

    got some ideas im kicking around for pt 2. should be up soon.
    test
  5. xMetasiNx

    xMetasiNx Met-uh-siN

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2012
    Messages:
    172
    I enjoyed reading this, well done.
    • +Rep +Rep x 1
    test
  6. Tacky Jones

    Tacky Jones www.TaCsmassivecock.gov

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2008
    Messages:
    76,201
    thank you, man.

    are you the same Meta from the RBL a few years ago?
    test
  7. lyricalpriest

    lyricalpriest Rap Games Dawson Creek

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2000
    Messages:
    24,093
    thaaaat ill thunn
    • +Rep +Rep x 1
    test
  8. xMetasiNx

    xMetasiNx Met-uh-siN

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2012
    Messages:
    172
    No, I'm not.
    • +Rep +Rep x 1
    test
  9. JASON ANTHONY

    JASON ANTHONY White Devil

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2010
    Messages:
    18,487
    This was really good. Record it.
    • +Rep +Rep x 1
    test
  10. MrWil

    MrWil New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 7, 2013
    Messages:
    2
    The story was very very nice. I could picture it in my head as I was reading each part. You made me feel as if I were the one in the story. Your talent is incredible. If there were a way to put that into a video it would be amazing due the fact that its real life. Keep the good work up can't wait to read more.
    • +Rep +Rep x 1
    test

Share This Page

Users Viewing Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 0)