Baby PLZ DON"T GOOO HOTTNESS FEEDBACKS PLZZZ

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by MisterEThoughts, Aug 13, 2003.

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  1. MisterEThoughts

    MisterEThoughts MysteryOfUntoldTruth

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2003
    Messages:
    1,990
    What are you saying?
    This just can not be…
    How can you just take your love away from me?

    This isn't very funny…
    I can't move on like that…
    You took my world,
    And threw it in the trash…

    Don't you know how much I loved you?
    Do you even care?
    It makes me have to wonder,
    What's going on up there…

    We spent a year together…
    A YEAR! Of heavenly bliss…
    If you leave me now…
    You'll forever be missed…

    Don't leave me baby…
    I love you so much…
    How can I move on,
    Without your gentle touch?

    Baby, baby please…
    I'm begging you please…
    Don't ever take your love away from me…

    Darling angel why…
    Please don't make me cry…
    Just take away my pain…
    There's nothing here to gain…

    Is there someone else?
    Baby I need to know…
    Otherwise baby..
    I can never let go….

    Why is it not important?
    It is so to me….
    Someone is taking my angel from me….

    Baby please just tell me…
    No baby please don't go….
    As long as we're here talking…
    I don't have to let go…

    Okay, until 10:30….
    I'll enjoy my final time…
    I'll tell you how much I love you…
    How I was so happy that you were mine….

    The time has come now darling?
    Remember this tonight…
    Forever and forever…
    Will I love you and hold you tight…..

    In my thoughts, and in my words….
    I will forever be so true…
    Because until the end of time…
    I will forever love you 'baby Boo'…..



    i miss her
    test
  2. 49th Prophet

    49th Prophet Dark Magic Inferno

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2003
    Messages:
    1,110
    Know how you feel, shit bro I feel for ya believe me,... love is just a word and emotion thought up by a master illusionist to lead us into the greatest pain possible...but speaking from experience Im gonna tell you to keep your head up, its hard, I know, but if you dont you'll jus spiral down til you cant go no further than its that much harder to get back up....as for the piece felt it was sincerely genuine...nice work

    much love

    peace
    test
  3. Dark_Angel

    Dark_Angel Dark_Angel

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2003
    Messages:
    798
    yeah i have to agree with 49th Prophet, love just leads to a pain thats hard to deal with and so hard to face when you lose it. but as said, keep your head and the peice was full of emotion, kept it intense the whole way through. nice peice
    test
  4. *Princess*

    *Princess* skantless bitch

    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2003
    Messages:
    591
    full of raw emotion....great piece keep your head up
    test
  5. Brown_Menace

    Brown_Menace Honey Hitta

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2003
    Messages:
    1,184
    nice. that piece was interesting but ill at the same time.
    test
  6. lpoet

    lpoet POET

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2002
    Messages:
    12,678
    i like this....kinda seemed like your were begging to me...and i dont like that...lol

    but it was a dope piece...nice and clean structed poem..i always gotta give love to pieces like this...cause i never can seem to write them...lol

    glad to see u outta that block

    keep dropin
    test
  7. MisterEThoughts

    MisterEThoughts MysteryOfUntoldTruth

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2003
    Messages:
    1,990
    thanks everyone thanks ipote hope to talk to u soon kid thanks everyone thanks a lot
    test
  8. Nebulaz

    Nebulaz fear God, not man

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2001
    Messages:
    950
    Poet, you cant write them, but you full of hate...j/k =) lol, you know i love your shit.

    back to the topic, i really dug this but the only problem i had with it was this part didnt share the same pattern of your rhyme scheme as everything else:

    Darling angel why…
    Please don't make me cry…
    Just take away my pain…
    There's nothing here to gain…
    test
  9. eatemup

    eatemup New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2002
    Messages:
    2,805
    well what can i say that hasn't been said already this was full of emotion and like 49th Prophet said love is something that will make you do some crazy things just keep your head up stay on track and you'll be alright , nice peice all in all
    test
  10. disciplestylez

    disciplestylez Broken Soul

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2003
    Messages:
    88
    this was a great piece....i was really feelin it.....

    stay up and GOD bless
    test
  11. MisterEThoughts

    MisterEThoughts MysteryOfUntoldTruth

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    1,990
    hey thanks all uppin
    test
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