An old, but good, 'Dear Dr. Laura'

Discussion in 'The Sanctuary' started by AliceHouse, Aug 15, 2013.

  1. AliceHouse

    AliceHouse The House Always Wins

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    Dear Dr. Laura,

    Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

    When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. How should I deal with this?

    I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as it suggests in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

    I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

    Lev. 25:44 states that I may buy slaves from the nations that are around us. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans but not Canadians. Can you clarify?

    I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

    A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 10:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

    Lev. 20:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

    I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
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  2. TheBigPayback

    TheBigPayback God Particle

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    Dr larua must be a black hebrew israelite...
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  3. AliceHouse

    AliceHouse The House Always Wins

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    White Christian American. The story behind it was that it was a tongue in cheek backlash from a long time ago when Dr. Laura insisted on using the bible to enforce prejudice against homosexuals. The idea with this is that if you take one part of the bible literally and as an authority, then you must obey the rest of the bible.

    But if we could own Canadians, I'd buy Sir Busta. I'd make him massage me and tell me stories about trollops and plugtails.
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  4. FeedMeMore

    FeedMeMore Moderator

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    Who responded to this also doesn't know scripture very well so just pulls out random scripture takes them out of context to fail and prove a point.
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  5. AliceHouse

    AliceHouse The House Always Wins

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    I'm pretty fairly certain that anyone who works from sundown on friday to sundown on saturday should be put to death.

    If you don't agree, you're the one failing ot understand the bible.
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  6. TheBigPayback

    TheBigPayback God Particle

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    Unfortunately even many seasoned christians have little understanding of scripture and context, law and grace, tradition and command, old and new dispensations.
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  7. Sir Bustalot

    Sir Bustalot I am Jesus

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    MMMMM shoulder massages, can i be shirtless and wear a Centaur costume?
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  8. AliceHouse

    AliceHouse The House Always Wins

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    Which you would think a religion inspired by a god wouldn't have to be so convoluted.
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  9. AliceHouse

    AliceHouse The House Always Wins

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    By all means.
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  10. TheBigPayback

    TheBigPayback God Particle

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    It wasnt for everyone. it was for people forming a new society apart from the society they had been for decades.
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  11. AliceHouse

    AliceHouse The House Always Wins

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    Sounds like a pretty minor diety to rabble in the issues of a small enslaved tribe. Rather than, y'know... everyone.
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