"Again I Miss u"

Discussion in 'Poetry Realm' started by iLL Script., Apr 14, 2004.

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  1. iLL Script.

    iLL Script. ~Poetic~

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2002
    Messages:
    15,884
    Missing u
    Sitting in a crowded room,
    but seeing no one,
    or hearing tha throbbing noise,
    just missing u and feeling alone.
    In a world so over populated,
    u feel so alone without that certain someone,
    beautiful, caring, and ambitious,
    sweet, smart, adn loving.
    Im always thinking of u,
    even in my unconsciencousness,
    where thoughts have little meaning,
    unless tha meanings are of being with u.
    without u I'd be lost,
    not knowing what to do,
    but as long as I have u,
    I know I'm sane and alive.
    I miss u every single moment,
    we are not together,
    missing your sweet smile,
    missing your beautiful face,
    and everything else about u.
    u have everything I want and more.
    God took special care in making u,
    and granting me tha pleasure of u presence,
    In my life body and soul.
    I would like to let u know,
    from tha very bottom of my heart,
    that I love u.
    test
  2. MarQuise*

    MarQuise* Can You Hear Me*

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2004
    Messages:
    5,268
    You know wha made this for me?

    I miss u every single moment,
    we are not together,
    missing your sweet smile,
    missing your beautiful face,
    and everything else about u.
    u have everything I want and more.
    God took special care in making u,
    and granting me tha pleasure of u presence,
    In my life body and soul.
    I would like to let u know,
    from tha very bottom of my heart,
    that I love u.


    That rite there, it did it for me, i enjoyed the whole drop, but for some reason, this bit really jus seemed like it stuck out, i liked this, i could feel emotion in it.
    Much Lv
    test
  3. allnakey

    allnakey Sex is no fun by yourself

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2003
    Messages:
    2,938
    "Im always thinking of u,
    even in my unconsciencousness,
    where thoughts have little meaning,
    unless tha meanings are of being with u. "


    I like how you put all of that, this definatly was the best part of the piece to me

    This was just an ok piece, ya know. I wasn't realy feeling it all to much cause it's all been said like this before beside the one part I pointed out. This piece still had a lot of good in it, but it just didn't seem to have that emotion in it that drives a lot of your pieces. Anyways just stay up and keep writing, This is a piece I think a lot of people can feel cause they can easily relate to it.


    Stay Up, Much Love, Peace
    test
  4. RealMS

    RealMS Ne te quaesiveris extra

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2004
    Messages:
    5,023
    damn, its no sudden surprise that I can def. feel this one. I can imagine this piece bein read on a hallmark card. Makes it feel like the days are strollin on by, takin its precious time-when the one time in your life you wish it weren't. Keep writing as always.
    -Peace & Love
    test
  5. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2001
    Messages:
    17,331
    Not one of your better pieces, but I still enjoyed the read. The beginning kinda reminded of that video wyclef had awhile ago for the song called "Gone Till November". Everybody was moving in regular motion, while he was moving in slow motion. Keep it up dude.

    one luv
    test
  6. illpoetical

    illpoetical raising the bar everyday

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    Messages:
    1,533
    tight piece, i liked it
    test
  7. lpoet

    lpoet POET

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2002
    Messages:
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    i dont know if this is a straight vent or what..but it seems real emotional.....couldnt really get into the piece though..just seemed to be missing something to me...not a bad piece though

    Upin for you tony
    test
  8. yea alot of emotion in this piece tony

    "even in my unconsciencousness,
    where thoughts have little meaning" very thought provoking..

    You outlined the bond of love and hope and gave a genuine sense of release from an unbalanced world when confronted with love, very inspiring..

    take care
    test
  9. Craccer_Jacc

    Craccer_Jacc SudAnillyst

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2003
    Messages:
    252
    nice piece yo very very felt i know what it's like to be longen for something or someone good emotion in this ...
    test
  10. snook546

    snook546 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 19, 2004
    Messages:
    39
    yo this piece is tight i am feeling this it shows alot of emmotion.... keep it up man peace
    test
  11. MANchyld

    MANchyld Guest

    This peace was very passionate... I can feel this and the emotion it expressed....

    makes me think of my daughter...

    anyways.. this was nice... you a put a real piece of you in there man... Keep up wit dat shit
    test
  12. Janitor

    Janitor Guest

    very nice
    test
  13. misspimp

    misspimp a.k.a KATURAH

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    1,308
    even in my unconsciencousness,
    where thoughts have little meaning,
    unless tha meanings are of being with u.

    alot of people have already qouted these lines but they are the truth....thas what i love about your writing most of all...its alwys so truthful...great piece!

    mad love
    test
  14. InTheStars

    InTheStars Reflective

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2004
    Messages:
    510
    This was a great piece by you. I know that I have felt that way about someone...always missing them and nothing else in the world matters. I agree with misspimp on those lines.

    much luv
    test
  15. Psycho69

    Psycho69 A Soul Born In Verse

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    Mar 17, 2002
    Messages:
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    Im always thinking of u,
    even in my unconsciencousness,
    where thoughts have little meaning,
    unless tha meanings are of being with u.
    without u I'd be lost,
    not knowing what to do,
    but as long as I have u,
    I know I'm sane and alive.
    I miss u every single moment,
    we are not together,


    Decent piece.. I can relate to this alot. Simple, but still nice.
    test
  16. x_M@miChul@_x

    x_M@miChul@_x Just Do It

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    Jan 22, 2004
    Messages:
    3,565
    very beautiful, u are very talented pa! Love this one [kissu]
    test
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