A man's rights in the case of abortion

Discussion in 'Ladies Lounge' started by Shit with corn in it IRM'S BITCH, Mar 4, 2006.

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  1. E. Fate

    E. Fate Guest


    And it's that mindstate that has alot of fathers not wanting anything to do with their kids.

    To have a child (wanted or unwanted), and KNOWING that neither of you are not ready for it, either emotionally or finanacially? That is only trouble and problems waiting to happen.
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  2. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

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    I think you read what I was saying wrong. I'm the father of a 5 year old little girl. With the exception of her first year with me being in and out of the hopsital and my mother dying I've been there for her everyday of her life.

    When I first found out that I was going to be a father, I wasn't too happy about it to be honest. Me and the mother sat down and talked it out and I told her, whatever she decides to do I'm going to roll with it. I knew we wasn't ready financially, shit we was still in highschool. I wasn't going to force her to keep it or get rid of it. I knew for a fact to her it didn't matter what I was thinking. And I'm being real with it, that's how it is for a lot of people. I've seen a lot of cases where the father really has no say...Regardless if he wants the baby or not. That final choice is the females choice.

    Nonetheless, that mindstate aint kept me from my child though. Honestly I think a nigga should be nominated for father of the year or something.

    And it's never really a right time to have a baby
    Regardless of how set you are in life.
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  3. Skrybe

    Skrybe ConnectedthruaForeignExch

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    ^
    So you basically gave up whatever choice you may have had in the matter, whether hypothetical or realistically. Which is how you feel that all men should do. Correct?
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  4. Mind~$oul

    Mind~$oul I'm Pretty

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    Like I said man.

    I gave up my choice because I knew I didnt' have a say in the decision. Regardless of if I wanted the baby or not. That's why I told her whatever she decided to do, I'm going to roll with it. I wasn't on no, "if you keep the baby I'm not fucking with you anymore" type shit. I didn't say anything about all men giving up their choice.

    I was simply stating that majority of the time, from my personal experience and from others I know of. The men usually doesn't have a fair say so in the decision. If they want the baby or don't want to the baby.
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  5. ~S*T*A*R*M~

    ~S*T*A*R*M~ Goddess

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    You make it sound so simple and uncomplicated, as though women are just storage units. Once the cargo-baby is out, just close up shop and move on? When is life ever that basic and uninvolved?

    I'll agree in saying that what you're suggesting makes sense logically. But when human beings are created, there is no logic. Ask any woman who has been pregnant, and I'm sure they'll say that pregnancy is an emotional experience (and arguably a psychological one), but it is not always a logical one, if ever.

    I'm not an advocate for abortion, but I can definitely empathise and argue against black & white viewpoints like yours. Imagine feeling completely imprisoned by your own body, and relenquishing all control over what happens to you for someone (a man) that will never truly understand. Where is the logic in that? The greater good theory is not always applicable. The experience goes far beyond just the 9 months; it is an unreversible commitment and connection for the rest of her life. Whether it is emotionally, physically, spiritually, or mentally, she will be affected for life. As dramatic & cliche as this may sound, everything will have changed forever. It really will.. in a big and unforgettable way. How do you propose a woman should just hand over her baby and still remain stable and relatively unchanged?

    Even after pregnancy, her wish of not becoming a parent will never be fulfilled if she gives birth. Like I said, what you suggested makes good sense, but when it comes to giving birth or not, the woman has the upper hand. Law or no law, if she wants to keep that baby, she will. If not, you are guaranteed that she will find a way to terminate it. Bottom line, as long as she is pregnant, that baby is still a part of her body, and who amongst us has any right to dictate what another person should or should not do w/ the one thing we can lay an unequivocal and unwavering claim to?
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  6. I'm not saying women are merely 'storage units', nor do I think the topic of abortion is simple and uncomplicated. I am saying that in the case where a woman does not want the baby but the man does, is does not seem out of the question to expect her to have it.

    I have to disagree. When human beings are created often logic comes into play. People make decisions all the time about whether they want to have children. Birth control for example is a logical choice for people who dont want to have babies. I think what you are trying to say though, is that pregnancy is an emotive and complicated subject and I agree with you.


    Imagine being a man who has made a child and that child is aborted and there is nothing he can do about it.E ven if he is man enough to take care of the child on his own. A good reflex defense is always to state that he or she could never understand. But it is not about understanding the plight, its about doing what's right, and this is what I am trying to figure out.

    Um, did you read the post? This is a hypothetical situation where the man wants the baby and the woman does not. If she wants the baby then she does not have to hand it over. Stay wit me now.

    I'm not sure that because the woman carries the baby, she is wholly responsible for the child when a man made the child too. She is certainly not wholly responsible for the child after the child is born. No, if a man is around he will be paying something towards the child whether he wanted the child or not, and rightly so, unless he has no money, or she has plenty. I do agree with your argument of emotional investment that a woman would develop into her pregnancy and beyond, though. I do not think that hardly any women after carrying a baby for 9 mnths would still at the end of it, not want the child.
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  7. VishTaphney

    VishTaphney Guest


    lets make it simple

    What would you rather live with?

    The guilt of eliminate life because you couldnt handle it or other reasons.

    or

    having a baby and handing it over to someone who can take care of it, and after having the baby learn your mistake and get the tubes tied?

    myabe your right humans lack logic ....I know a couple of women who get abortions like candy and break mens hearts and have no remorse or guilt but I guess karma will come back at them one day...
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  8. ~S*T*A*R*M~

    ~S*T*A*R*M~ Goddess

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    The argument of it being a "reflex defense" is neither here nor there. What's important to point out is that is it not just about the baby's well-being. There are grown adults with progressing lives that are affected by the pregnancy and the birth of the child. No, no man (and fairly, no woman who has not been through abortion) could truly appreciate the depth of the after-effect this could have on person's well-being. And, yes actually, it has everything to do with understanding the plight. Whether it be the man's, the woman's or even the baby's, there are people involved. It is far-removed from just "handing over the responsibility." There are lives at stake, literally and figuratively.

    It's about doing what's "right?" Right for whom? As I said, the greater good theory is not always rational or applicable.





    Yes, I most definitely did. Did you read mine? If not, I'll understand why you seem to have missed the crux of my argument, but I will restate it: This situation reaches far beyond handing over a baby. It's not about the act, it is about the continuing effects after the act. This is what makes it a sticky situation, and not as cut and dry as simply giving birth and giving the baby to the daddy. It has very little with just giving birth. There are much larger and more important issues at hand.





    Yes, responsibility should inherently lie with both parents. Good point, and you are probably correct. But don't you see the problem? If a woman says she does not want anything to do with the baby, but yet is forced to carry, bond, deliver, and possibly even name her child, she will be connected with that baby forever. And more often than not, a woman will want to keep her child after birth, but this in direct conflict with her original wishes of not wanting to be involved, not wanting to endure the ordeal, and most importantly, not ready or wanting to be a parent. But yet, there she'll be with a baby in hand, and no way to say no; "No" to becoming a parent, and "no" to giving her child away either. Therein lies the dilemma she may have been trying to avoid from the beginning.
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  9. ~S*T*A*R*M~

    ~S*T*A*R*M~ Goddess

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    It's not about what I would want to live with. It is not my situation to live with, nor will it ever be. I know what my decision would be. Regardless, as I've said, it's not just about having a baby. The act of having the baby is arguably the least worrisome issue to deal with.
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  10. VishTaphney

    VishTaphney Guest


    ets make it simple

    What would you rather live with?

    The guilt of eliminate life because you couldnt handle it or other reasons.

    or

    having a baby and handing it over to someone who can take care of it, and after having the baby learn your mistake and get the tubes tied?
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  11. ~S*T*A*R*M~

    ~S*T*A*R*M~ Goddess

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    lol.. ok. Let's make it simple, then: Your question is too loaded for me to answer because of the reasons that I've already replied to you with.
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  12. VishTaphney

    VishTaphney Guest


    cop out.
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  13. LiveFromThe781

    LiveFromThe781 Don Of The Den

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    ^ just because someone gives up a baby doesnt make them "guilty" or mean they made a mistake. Youre a fool. Which do YOU think is worse having an abortion on a child that isnt conscious or having a baby that grows up in a broken home, making the mother quit whatever job she was working/work a dead end job cause she has to take care of the kid thus ruining 2 lives or more if it ends up being twins.
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  14. VishTaphney

    VishTaphney Guest



    cop out by not answering the questions bro lol.

    to answer your questions then she would have controlled her legs people who dont know about the consequences of sex shouldnt be having it in the first place...tough luck get the tubes tied is what I will tell the lady, until then take responsibility for your actions more people should do that you know how many great individuals were born to single moms? in our life today people are selfish women dont know sacrifice anymore oh well thats the downfall of life irresponsible selfish people.
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  15. ~S*T*A*R*M~

    ~S*T*A*R*M~ Goddess

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    I've given more than enough information on the topic, so take from it what you will. If you want a more direct answer, then you'll have to ask a more fair question.
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  16. LiveFromThe781

    LiveFromThe781 Don Of The Den

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    yes i know things can still work out if the woman doesnt get an abortion. but you have to realize sometimes its the only logical choice, and sometimes shit happens and plans get fucked up when your pregnant. if a girl is pregnant and something unexpected comes up that would make it near impossible to raise a child and support herself do you still think its wrong to have an abortion? i dont mean to toot my own horn, but my policy on abortion is the best one out.
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  17. VishTaphney

    VishTaphney Guest


    like I said tough luck....its 2006 women are no longer able to fool people with there mistakes and then crying afterwards...if anyone is fooled by that they are morons.

    I really dont feel sad for a chick who has a kid, unless it was by rape or incest...then id understand the abortion,,,if a woman just keeps having an abortion she is low scum to me...with no concious, just get the tubes tied best answer.

    I believe in equality.

    men deserve the right to keep the child...and women need to stop manipulating people with there emotional act to get their ways.
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  18. LiveFromThe781

    LiveFromThe781 Don Of The Den

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    i didnt say anything about manipulation, i said sometimes plans get fucked up and the situation can go from great to hell. maybe you've never heard the expression "it was all good just a week ago".Sometimes an abortion is apporpiate, just like sometimes war is appropriate. Theyre last resorts and should hope to be avioided but if thats the only reasonable way of making something work out better in the long run.

    ps -whats the difference between using a condom/masturbating and an abortion?
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