7. Wisdom 8-2 Vs 8. Propetional 9-2

Discussion in 'The Rapmusic Storytelling/Topical League' started by Nebz, Oct 5, 2003.

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  1. Nebz

    Nebz R.I.P. Point Game

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    VERSES DUE Wednesday 10:00pm PACIFIC/1:00am EST
    VOTES DUE Saturday 10:00am PACIFIC/1:00pm EST


    VOTING RULES
    No beef votes
    No payback votes
    No 2nd Chance Votes, Once and Done


    VOTE ON 6 BATTLES!!!!!


    FAILURE TO DO SO RESULTS IN 3 VOTE SUBTRACTION!!!
    This week and following we will enforce this rule



    4 lines - NO SHOWS
    12 lines - MIN
    60 lines - MAX


    Fail to Post URL's all those votes will not count

    Your Topics are here
    http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread.php?threadid=646828


    if you win by no-show u are encouraged to vote still in other matches!!!!!


    NEW RULE: Voting On a No-show Verse does not Count as your vote, Both Competitors must show.

    Go Forth And Produce​
    test
  2. WiSDoM

    WiSDoM I t0k yer wifes virginity

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    im here
    test
  3. prophetional

    prophetional hokey muh-fuckin' pokey

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    test
  4. WiSDoM

    WiSDoM I t0k yer wifes virginity

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    no doubt..u 2 kid..
    test
  5. prophetional

    prophetional hokey muh-fuckin' pokey

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    1.You are a stray bullet used in a 8murder, tell your story-Camber


    split seconds are weeks, breaths equivalate to years
    blood trickles like the peak of life, pour in your tears.
    the climax, hit in seconds and the leaks reveal fears.
    cri-sis has been created, 'for you knew what you hear.
    not even midlife, 20 something, life of a shell.
    a modern day sickle, reapor, send ya heaven or hell.
    often tell by the final words heard when they yell.
    lemme re-evaluate and leave it clear as a bell.
    before he fell, "SHOT!" echos off the concrete and glass
    in slow-mo, mother labors, through her womb i do pass
    head first, fast, furious, fin'lly to bask
    out in the sunlight, baby born, anger unmasked.
    no-one's worthy of the breath that they have, it may be rash
    but no-body asked and honestly regret if they had.
    cat was mad about a bag, guess this other cat grabbed,
    snuck him hard with gat upside his se'n and a half (7 1/2)
    fitted cap. so he prayed to the god of his wrath
    retaliation was the motivation more then a tad.
    seen the sucker, so he fucked her. had my mom in his pants.
    fingered her a lil more, and 9 seconds had passed.
    like 9 months, term, fire broke, litter of 6.
    three older brothers. me. baby brother and sis.
    our adolescence hissed, pissed, my oldest brother had missed,
    the next two hit violently one right in the lips.
    i whistleld over head, hit the bricks, chip on my tooth.
    busted loose, off a sign post and back in his ribs.
    sissy hit his sack of kids, i just stopped where i did.
    then set up shop and locked, grid style, not to be rid.
    the kid slid, tests suggest with beef you stick wit the vest.
    i gave him death and fealt a quake shake me right where i rest.
    i cannot take life, only help progress to the next,
    though nothing less, kept on livin', birds we fly from the nest.
    could have a clue about my family but wish 'em the best.
    history explains the rest, by now they're prolly all gone.
    'cept i bet that thorough duke still reproducin' wit moms.
    me and this uncle tom sucker, yeah he lived through the storm.
    they called him wis-dom, but the kid is constantly calm
    in bullet years i'm near 11 now, millenium's spawned.
    retired in his spinal chord, bored, just writin' these songs.
    test
  6. WiSDoM

    WiSDoM I t0k yer wifes virginity

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    damn, already dropped the bomb on me lol..didnt even come around to start writing yet...but imma do the same topic..dope verse man..good luck
    test
  7. WiSDoM

    WiSDoM I t0k yer wifes virginity

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    writing it now..in the process...wasn't trying to feed of ur verse, just had some shit to do..
    test
  8. WiSDoM

    WiSDoM I t0k yer wifes virginity

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    sorry ta keep u waiting..



    10.You have been, seeing this girl for 2 weeks. U guys havent had sex but on that one special night you guys finally have intercourse.....You roll over the Next morning and shes Gone....and Left u a Note, Saying what? expand, explain the evening-Mr Rstl

    *Explaning the night on how I met my girlfriend of 2 weeks*

    This night was special, had an occassion I must attend
    It was the going away party for Mike, the man was my best friend
    I've known him since I was ten, and I hated to see him depart
    Noone was like this guy, he held a special place in my heart
    The party would soon start, quickly I hopped into the shower
    Got myself ready, figured I would be there in about an hour
    Arrived before most people, I thought I would try and help
    I noticed a beautiful girl at the table, approached and introduced myself
    Said my name was John, and I was Mike's best friend
    She spoke with a heavy accent, at first it was hard to comprehend
    We spent some time talking, understanding each others needs
    I was kinda falling for this girl, but I didn't wanna believe
    I pushed it away with ease, moved along, meeting new people
    She followed me around that nite, something about her smile seemed so evil
    She seemed to innocent to be deceitfuL, but im clueless to her past
    Her emotional history, whos shes been with, seemed to early to ask
    I was up for the task, winning her heart became my goal
    To have her in my arms, and be the one I hug and console
    I got a hold of her, right when she was about to leave
    Said Id love to see her again, and I only live up the street
    She gave me a kiss on the cheek, and we exchanged numbers
    As soon as I placed it in my pocket, the sky opened up with thunder...

    *The Date with Amanda, Saturday Nite*

    (Amanda = Girlfriend)
    RiverLady = Restraunt out on the water...


    The sky burned a crimson red, there was nothing lacking
    I knew tonight would be it, we would make love with undying passion
    We stayed laughin that night, not once did I see a frown
    Got dinner out on the RiverLady, and spent some time uptown
    There was no need to slow down, everything was moving at good pace
    We would get a couple drinks, and then rest back at my place
    But in that case, the night was young and was far from bland
    Walked hand and hand on the beach, our toes sunk into the sand
    I jumped at her command, carressed her body and rubbed her face
    Locked our lips together, as Im loving the way she taste
    We would head back to my place, I put the music on a soft tone
    Started kissing each other, felt the chill down my backbone
    We were finally alone, the moment I've been waiting for
    She was the one of my dreams, the girl Id love and adore
    As she tore my shirt off, she was quick to jump on top
    Ran her finger nails down my chest, until she reached my cock
    I kissed her non stop, understood her needs by the notion
    I even held her hand tight, as we progressed with every motion
    The bed rippled like oceans, and we were heading into high-tide
    I busted while inside, grabbed her and hugged her so tight
    Spoke the words I love you, while I kissed her goodnight...

    *Woke up that morning, and found a letter on my nightstand*

    Dear John,

    I've never went thru this before, and theres a reason
    Im a cold hearted bitch John, and I shouldn't be breathing
    Im leaving you this note, and Im sorry you were betrayed
    But about 3 years ago, I happend to be diagonised with AIDS
    I didn't mean for you to be played, you didn't deserve this from me
    I hated my own life, and I brought others down among me
    Im beyond sickly, wake up in the mornings hoping to die
    Especially now, considering I just ruined your life
    My problems dont give me the right, to hurt others as well
    Theres no way to even say sorry, trust me I'll burn in hell
    I can tell thats what your thinking, as your reading this letter
    Medications won't help, I wont lie and say it gets better
    You'll remember me forever, all because I wanted sex
    I'll deal with this sorrow, and live life full of regret...
    Im sorry...

    Love Always,
    Amanda...

    *edited to fix some bolding*
    test
  9. Nebz

    Nebz R.I.P. Point Game

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    Over No Shows
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  10. Dah Alpha Male

    Dah Alpha Male New Member

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    ouch...

    GOOD FUCKING BATTLE FELLAS..

    props to the both of you...


    proph-
    that was some great writing man... opened smoothly.. had me a bit confused around the middle a bit... but still.. some good shit..

    wisdom-
    damn fluent story telling skills... that was also some good shit... had me engaged in that verse which is rare.....

    overall I felt wisdom came better on this one.. but proph man, you still came dope as fuck...

    VOTE= WISDOM
    test
  11. SamGoodY

    SamGoodY trully inspired...

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    two verses that were pretty ill... good battle here... pro's verse i thought was better, not taking anything at all away from wisdoms... it's just, i used the same topic as wisdom, and the verse he wrote is the most predictable story line for the topic he chose. although it was constructed quite nicely, told a good story, smooth, etc. i honestly thought the idea behind it was too simple for anyone to actually use on that topic. (it's why i didn't do it that way)
    1.we met,
    2.we liked each other,
    3.we fucked,
    4.she bounced
    5.why? because she gave me aids...
    pro's verse was more abstract, constructed just as nicely as wisdom's, and though his ending wasn't "mindblowing" or "WOW" by any means, it was enough to make me say "haha"....

    vote=proph.
    big ups to both though.
    test
  12. WiSDoM

    WiSDoM I t0k yer wifes virginity

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    test
  13. Den-S

    Den-S .:.The Chosen One.:.

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    wow this was a damn good battle...

    pro= loved your style, had some nice multis and a sick flow and you developed your topic more creatively and more complex, IMO...liked the ending, but felt your strongest points were at the beginning...

    Wisdom- really dope verse...told perfectly, but I thought it lacked creativity and it wasnt as complex or innovative...you're a fuckin master at story-tellin, but thought you could've been more creative...

    vote= pro...just by a hair...
    test
  14. prophetional

    prophetional hokey muh-fuckin' pokey

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    2-1, no doubt sun, back atcha. glad you came strong.
    test
  15. SIN2

    SIN2 as we speak

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    DAMN....lol....

    THIS was VERY hard to choose from...

    first off...
    Pro i'm feelin ya wordplay....ya story was well constructed...but it failed to keep me readin tword tha end....u slacked....ya closer wasnt as good as ya opener....

    Wis....came wit nice images ways to let me into tha relationship between the 2...tho i kinda figured it would be the Aids thing....u pulled it off....kept me readin 4 sure...

    vote=Wisdom
    test
  16. Gummo

    Gummo New Member

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    yooooooo illl battle.. love'n the comp.

    pro, you got my style down pat, i loved the read, very serious writing here, wisdom, same to you.. both had great verses and was def. worthy of top10 status, there was really no flaws except for flow at some points but thats just the way i read it so no points deducted for that, it just comes down to which i read twice!!.. and thats pro's.. i loved the verse man, a def great piece... no downplay to wisdom, but i liked pro's better.. great battle yall,... look forward to compete'n next week.. pz

    vote: pro
    test
  17. Richard Corey

    Richard Corey battle like a savage

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    Yeah, pro takes this one easy for me. His verse was just full of philosophy and metaphor! It was incredible to be so short. And although the "I gave you power" Nas-ish topic is getting tired, I love it when people can flip it to do something even the originator, Nas didn't do. I loved the personification of the bullet and his "family." I also loved how you added the element of a battle verse in your piece, having the cat who got shot be named "wisdom." lol. aight, I got you man.

    Wisdom, lol, was wisdom was nice too...but someone's going to have to figure a way to flip this concept without the man/woman at the end having AIDS. I've seen this story so many times. Everytime this topic comes up, this is what people come up with, "she had AIDS." I don't know if you've read as many pieces as I have, so I'm not blaming you or anything, I"m just saying I've seen it so much...so it doesn't impress me...

    Pro just had the better ability. With the metaphors and the lyrics, his verse was also just written better.

    vote: prophetional.
    test
  18. prophetional

    prophetional hokey muh-fuckin' pokey

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    4-2... ayo wise.... had me worried after i read your verse, not sure which ways cats votes would sway... big ups sun... we'll cross again probably.
    test
  19. WiSDoM

    WiSDoM I t0k yer wifes virginity

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    test
  20. WHITETRASH

    WHITETRASH New Member

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    vote= wisdom.....

    he actually told a story but props only just rymed cool words together and i couldn't/didn't wanna follow his story till the end
    test
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