45. Pharaohe Def 0-0 vs. 46. Text 0-0

Discussion in 'The Rapmusic Storytelling/Topical League' started by Omen, Jul 12, 2003.

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  1. Omen

    Omen O Luh Da Kids

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    [​IMG]


    VERSES DUE Wednesday 10:00pm PACIFIC/1:00am EST
    VOTES DUE Saturday 10:00am PACIFIC/1:00pm EST


    Choose 1 topic here:
    http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread.php?postid=6724312#post6724312


    and write your story for your match in this thread!


    LINE LIMIT:
    4 lines - NO SHOWS
    16 lines - MINIMAL
    52 lines - MAXIMAL


    VOTING:
    No crew votes
    No payback votes
    No 2nd Chance Votes


    YOU MUST MUST MUST -- POST YOUR URL'S OF ALL THE BATTLES YOU VOTED ON HERE IN YOUR OWN THREAD..

    VOTE ON 6 BATTLES!!!!!

    FAILURE TO DO SO RESULTS IN 3 VOTE SUBTRACTION!!!


    if you win by no-show u are encouraged to vote still in other matches!!!!!



    GO FOR IT!!!
    test
  2. Pharaohe Def

    Pharaohe Def Take a Swing

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    test
  3. Text

    Text Dot Dash

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    Im in, g'luck
    test
  4. Text

    Text Dot Dash

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    Topic:you wake up, make sum breakfast, when theres a knock at the door, you look outside and the police are waitin impatiently outside.


    ....All was calm, but then my tranquilty was broke by my alarm
    I rose my arm & shut out the sound with one strike of my palm
    My neck hurts, as i arose from my bed, i started to stretch first
    Before dragging my tiredness body, to go serve up breakfast..
    All seemed normal,i finished my flake's,then went back for more
    & as i stared into the morning daylight,i heard a knock at the door
    I peered out, It was the police.

    The Night Before.

    watching out of my window, to make sure my wife had set off
    I had business to atend to, it was time to knock the debt off,
    My head was filled with fear's, the thought of getting caught
    But the image of my wife's face,when i tell her what i've bought..
    Kept me going, but still the tear's kept on flowing..&
    The guilt ill have to live though, without her even knowing
    But i managed to hold my own, as i set out from hiding..
    & I started the car without realising i was banned from driving
    I drove slowly down a statly road, picking out my first home
    & it took me about an hour, to steal all but a garden gnome
    Aferward's, i felt overwhelmed, i'd commited a crime without violence
    Everthing seemed so peacefull But then the silence turned to siren's
    My heart increased, my stomach fell down into my shoe's
    I'd entered a game of cat & mouse, which i could not lose
    The sweat started pouring down my head, this was insane
    I could hear the siren's closing in, i needed to change the terrain
    Taking a hard left, i felt my bone's jump, this was'nt gonna work
    But i managed to reach the road again, but i ran over an office cleak
    This was all too crazy, a nightmare from which i could'nt wake
    Was i a murderer? i can't stay to find out this mistake..
    Though all the chaos, i suddenly realised the siren's had stopped,
    I stopped the car, & jumped out, just as my tire had popped,
    & i stood there, my breathing heavy, as i listened
    Then i turned, and ran as much as i could into the distance.
    I had made it.

    Presant time.

    I broke free of my day dream, there's no where to run
    I guess im going to jail & my wife's pregnaut with my son
    The freight filled me as slowly i opened the door..
    I could'nt look them in the face, my eye's stared at the floor
    Shaking violently, i asked them the problem, have they got me?
    But instead was told to come with them to identfiy my wife's body

    Hour's later

    This was beyond my worst fear, this was more than god's strife
    The office clerk i killed last night, turned out to be my wife...
    This is worst than jail.....
    test
  5. Pharaohe Def

    Pharaohe Def Take a Swing

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    i just wanted to let you & the mods know that i plan to post... but i've been very busy this week with a class, and family problems along with other verses for other sites...

    so if i don't post until the morning... plz allow it.

    thanks.
    test
  6. Text

    Text Dot Dash

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2003
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    299
    its aight dawg no problem
    test
  7. Pharaohe Def

    Pharaohe Def Take a Swing

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    Topic : You've been murdered. After death you have a chance to come back and do what you feel needs done..so what would that be? Tell someone or do something yourself? Room for creativity...

    Burdens left on my family, my mother’s heart burning a wide load
    Trying to figure out… why her baby was found dead on a side road
    For her recently life’s slowed… & her pain is ever burning deeper
    But there’s a message I must convey… as her same returning reaper
    She raised me as a keeper, never showed anger… never asked respect
    So now it’s my duty… to show her I’m alright in this life after death
    You always put me ahead of others… so I never felt like second rate
    I reckon fate will bring us together, once I make it thru heaven’s gates
    On my way, back to Earth… I will crack a curse, leaving ur chest raveled
    It won’t take me long to arrive… I’ll take the course less traveled

    * Arrives from Heaven … and returns to his old neighborhood as a ghost*

    Seems that things aren’t just the same… it’s changed, these streets were violent
    They’ve estranged from noisy corners… & now for weeks they’ve just been silent
    Step into my old house, family’s gathered… & I arrive to see
    Everybody crying, because of my death… my legacy, they strive to be
    A surprise to me… perhaps I was to blind to see why people were there
    Weeks after my death, they’re still suffering … guess it proves that they care
    Un-aware … that I’m in there presence … not knowing nor believing
    That they can’t see me… yet that doesn’t mean I’m not a witness to their grieving
    Some don’t show emotions, or cry… that’s just what others choose
    I find my sisters & brothers together.. inside of my mothers room
    It’s hard to do, being around people… that you care for so much
    But not being able to communicate… except through prayer n’ such
    I must find my crutch, my mother… she’s such a loving & smart lady
    Keep in touch through the heart lately, after all she in part… made me
    Might sound a bit crazy… but I need to let her know I’m doing well
    & that I’m not pursuing hell but more or less renewing self
    So I’m choosing to tell … my mother, through a symbol I’ll give her message
    That as a spirit I must return to heaven… so I’m going to deliver a presage
    She must know, she has to… that her baby’s alright & doing fine
    & that through her she’s going to help.. be my backbone, my living spine
    So as she leaves the house… unlocks, opens… & shuts the door
    I shall open it once again… as I had done so much before
    She stops, & begins to think… what just happened, her skin gets pink
    In her mind, she knows I’m fine… & her pain begins to shrink
    Her eyes towards me they wink, letting me know her tore heart now can mend
    The pain & agony she once suffered… as she shuts the door once again
    test
  8. Resilient.

    Resilient. .. . ..

    Joined:
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    29,663
    .. ^ Over No Shows
    test
  9. ILLMC0615

    ILLMC0615 The Eminent Lyricist

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    582
    vote= Text

    had better multis and flow and also a very well developed plot...PD had a nice drop too, but I thought that Text's flow and content won this over
    test
  10. MC4SiGHT

    MC4SiGHT JOE COMMiSSO

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    Text- this was a very nice verse you had some nice imagery, a good structureand rhyme scheme but the actual story you came through with just started gettin a little boring to me towards the end, and then when i read the ending part i just kinda didn't like the verse, the way u explained the end...i just think it could have came out better...

    Pharaohe Def- real nice verse here, i like the dark type stuff, a lot of great imagery, a good flow, good story, and a fairly good ending, those last few lines about the whole door concept were pretty nice, couple little things here and their i wasn't feelin but overall i felt you had the better verse...

    Vote-Pharoahe Def
    test
  11. Pharaohe Def

    Pharaohe Def Take a Swing

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    test
  12. Pharaohe Def

    Pharaohe Def Take a Swing

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    test
  13. Pharaohe Def

    Pharaohe Def Take a Swing

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    test
  14. Resilient.

    Resilient. .. . ..

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    I'll be the deciding vote like it or not..

    Phizzle Def - Great story with some decent imagery. Stayed with your story, and it was a good read. Ended it off quite nicely as well. I especially enjoyed how you approached the topic, and you told the story. Didn't let it tell itself. That got you the win.

    Text - You didn't come that bad though, I'll admit. Good verse, with little imagery, and a decent storyline

    Good job both ofyou..




    Winner: Pharoah Def 1-0
    Loser: Text 0-1

    -Weez
    test
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